Avoid Obsessing over a Guy
Even if you really like a guy, you don't want your relationship with (or crush on) him to rule your life. If you want to keep your distance, here are some ways to keep from obsessing over a guy.
Contents
Steps
- Don't tell your friends about your crush. If you tell them, they will encourage this influence. For example, they often will nudge you when he walks by or spread newly acquired gossip about him. If you want to get over a guy, it's best not to have your friends constantly pushing you in his direction.
- Forgive yourself and him for not liking you and you for falling for him.
- Don't try to follow him everywhere. he'll think you're a stalker.
- Try to imagine actually spending a life with your guy. Is it really worth it?
- Make friends with lots of other guys. Not to make him jealous, but to meet other people.
- Take up a hobby, Something else to occupy your mind. You have a life outside of this guy, so explore it! Get to know the world around you.
- Keep your perspective. He is not the start or the end of the world.
- Make a list of your ideal guy and visualize the first meeting of your husband.
- Play matchmaker and set up dates for your friends.
- Get a diary and write about your obsession to get it out of your mind.
- Find a responsible adult or a non-gossipy friend to talk about things with.
- If you ask him/her out and you get rejected, remember that if he/her had said yes than it would have hurt more as a break-up than just rejection.
- Get off the computer. Although looking through the boy's Myspace or Facebook profile may seem harmless, this just increases the obsession and becomes a habit. Do not get in the habit of 'cyber-stalking' as it can lead to more problems than it started with. Healthy relationships do not revolve around computers and social networking sites, they begin with face to face interaction.
- Try not to think about them as much. It may be hard to not think about him/her, but not thinking about them helps. Every time you think about them your obsession remains. Instead of thinking about them, think about other things and if you absolutely can't stop, then think about their flaws.
- If you keep on blushing, try your best to breathe slowly. Tell yourself in your head that his/her jokes aren't that funny, and analyse every detail about him/her. Does their breath stink? Are his/her sneakers filthy? Focus on all the negative things.
Tips
- Don't call or text the guy too much, it'll scare him off and it makes you look needy and insecure.
- But also be careful, some guys will take advantage of seeing how much you like them to get you in bed. A guy will tell you everything you want to hear and promise you exactly the same things that you are indirectly telling him you want to hear. Then if you are extremely physically attracted to him he will play you like a fiddle. That will be the beginning of your downfall once he gets what he wanted it, you will be blaming yourself for why he doesn't like you anymore and you will see he is a real jerk.
- Enjoy being yourself and be around people that used to make you happy. If it was him, then talk to your friends about it. Stay positive because he might not be the right one for you after all.
- Try not to talk to him a lot in class or lunch there's are more people out there for you to talk to. Don't give the guy a reason to think you like him. Just get over it and focus to your studies and the people who you love.
- Avoid making eye contact when you're not in conversation.
- Avoiding bumping into him. If you know he'd be at a certain place or walking through a certain hallway then avoid those places.
- Talk to your friends. Interacting with them might help you forget about him.
- If the one above doesn't work, try politely avoiding him and telling a friend you are no longer obsessed with him. Eventually you won't be.
- Not to mention avoid him if possible, and if he's not your friend and just some guy you had a crush on, then move on. As well as avoiding and or ignoring him, but DON'T if he's your friend. Sometimes this will help but not always. It's hard at first but once you start and all, you'll be better off and might have succeeded in getting over him. Don't talk to him stay, only to him if it is absolutely necessary
- Think about all the times he made you cry in comparison to how he made you laugh. Did you really forget about how he hit you, cheated on you, betrayed you, than abandoned you? Think about it, and that gives you a view of what your future would have been with him.
- Try obsessing with a hot guy celebrity instead. This will be healthier than obsessing with a guy you see every day.
- It is not his fault he doesn't like you. Don't take it out on him.
- If none of the above works and you find yourself desperate to stop liking him, then here is a tough, foolproof plan: Go up to him and tell him that you like him. If he doesn’t like you back, then hopefully your infatuation will eventually go away with time. If he does like you then you will live happily ever after.(well maybe not happily ever after, but at least try it! Trust me it'll work!)
- Try not to talk about him too much to your friends or avoid observing what he does when you see him.
- Don't avoid him completely. Just don't be over the top and be everywhere he is. Could b a chance he likes you and if you ignore him he might lose interest in you. Find creative things to do to help keep your mind off him. Give him space, but not too much space.
- Don't text him. Let him text you first so you don't sound like you are obsessed with him. If you see him, just smile or say hi and walk away.
- Don't try to get too much attention from him especially when he's around his friends. It might push him away or may just be too much for him to handle.
- Avoid listening to songs and watching movies that make you think of him, like any romantic movies or songs.
Warnings
- Rejection is hard, but it's not the end of the world.
- Though many people think that "getting a new crush will help" it really doesn't. It just gives you someone else to like and need to stop liking again next month. Nobody really wants that now do they?
- Don't become one of those girls who is always obsessing over boys, no guy wants to hang around that kind of girl, it's not attractive. What is attractive is a girl who has her own life and doesn't mope over boys. This doesn't mean you can't be excited, hurt or upset, just don't base your whole life around them!
