Be a Good Talker

In every relation the most important role is the way through which people respond and communicate with each other. There are two basic ways of face-to-face communication: body language and verbal communication. Both are interconnected and interdependent, but verbal expressions are always assisted by one's body language. If your vocabulary, purpose and style of speaking are good, then you can be a successful person in every aspect of life. Here are a`few steps on how to be successful through communicating well.

Steps

  1. Put forth an appropriate body presentation: that is a "must" for a good talker. Are you convincing someone -- if so, your words become more effective with a nice smile. You can not afford any bad gesture or weak logic at that time. If you do not have a natural smile on your face, then assume that, "I am playing a role in a particular kind of movie or drama." You should act like a professional actor/actress would do, by bringing the right gestures on your face and body for your situation. A stony, seemingly uncaring face is boring, confusing and self-defeating.
  2. Use well chosen words to make a good sentence at the right place and exact time needed; well timed responses make it work. It is only possible by reading the situation instantly, using your automatic senses -- not like some autopilot, or robot, but being natural and fitting. For this purpose, to read the situation, you should be a good observer, or become a good observer/listener, and make a special effort to show a good kind and degree of response.
  3. Make brief breaks in your sentences. Pause, momentarily where it seems natural. This means that you should give a little time to the other to absorb the words of your sentence. Allow questions, objections and remarks. Here once again you will need a strong observation about the surroundings and the interests of the person to whom you are talking. If you feel that he/she has little interest in your talk, then try to wind up your topic or intermix with another topic and bend your perspective in a connective manner.
  4. Never unnecessarily confront someone directly through your words, if he/she is wrong, or you feel them wrong. If you do so, you may have lost the value of your sentences by inducing negative feelings. Be kind to one another.
  5. Regard the topic and your surroundings to always choose the better type of physical contact. If you are discussing business deals in an office or in some other rather formal places then just a confident measure in your voice and smiling is enough to support your words, and then an appropriate firm handshake, bowing if appropriate, on greeting and parting may be welcome and impressive. But, if you are in a garden with someone on a walk, then it may be good to walk hand in hand, if that is appropriate for the persons involved.
  6. To be an impressive and good talker avoid too much explanation of each and every thing without a demand such as "Tell me what you mean!" or a question like, "What do you mean?" Over-doing your talk may bore, or insult the listener, lose the person's attention and the value and importance of the matter which you are discussing.
  7. Listen to your partner with complete patience as another critical mode for a good talker. If you are not willing to listen to him/her, then assume that, "I am listening to a radio DJ, that I must listen to on how to win a prize, or to get very important news and information." While listening to your partner, it is must that you to respond actively with your body language (normally smile, nod with agreement) and use brief expressions spaced throughout like "Yes.", "I agree.", "You are right.", etc, etc. This step will assure him/her that you are fully interested to listen, talk or discuss, and obviously your partner will give you a reward (such as accepting your plan or buying your product) in the end of your discussion.
  8. Always keep your tone according to the meaning of the sentence. You should not say an aggressive sentence with a polite tone -- or vice versa. That would seem sarcastic or as "reverse logic". If you do so, it will hurt your chances of a good result in your relationship with your partner a lot.
  9. Use a well fitting volume of your speaking voice. It must not be so loud that passing people can understand you easily but not so low that it brings difficulty to your partner in hearing. In both cases your partner will feel an insult or uneasiness about what is spoken.
  10. If you feel that your partner is not getting you due to some reason, or doesn't want to agree with you -- in this case you should not stick with that topic. But it is also a bad idea to change your topic very suddenly, or all at once. So, link your continuing sentences with the other topic to flow onward with purpose, not breaking the spirit of the relationship for communicating successfully.

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