Get Everything You Want in Life

What do you want in life? Do you have a cherished goal or ambition? A good job, a fancy car, a nice house? While you can’t get literally everything in life, it is certainly possible to aim high, dream, and achieve a lot. You will have to form a clear plan, act, and show commitment, discipline, and a sense of purpose, though. Your dreams won’t come true through wishful thinking.

Steps

Crafting a Plan

  1. Assess your wants and desires. The first step is to know what you want in life. We’re not just talking about material objects but goals, achievements, and feelings. Look inside and ask yourself what it is that you most desire.[1]
    • Ask what it is that you want in life and what is most important to you. Try writing down your answers as they come, without assessing them.
    • Be as specific as possible in your stating what you want. “I want a lot of money” is a start, but “I want to be financially secure and retire by age 50” is more specific and better.
    • Are your desires achievable? Are they realistic? Are they about you? They will need to be. You might have a good job, but can you manage to retire early? How would you do so?
  2. Focus on what is most important and attainable. Let’s be real: you probably cannot achieve everything that you want in life. Cars, clothes, fabulous riches, luxuries – it would simply take too much effort and divide your energies. Focus on what is most important to you, giving that your full effort.
    • Look again at your list of wants and desires and reassess it. What is at the top? Is your desire for financial security and to retire early really what you want most out of life?
    • Ask yourself again whether it is doable. Are you sure that you can manage this goal or are you simply setting yourself up for failure?
    • Try to be realistic and open-minded. Don’t embark on an overly ambitious dream if you doubt that it can be done.
  3. Set a long-term goal. Having a long-term goal will give focus to your ambitions, give you a sense of purpose, and make you aware of possible obstacles. For instance, where and how to you envision your life in the future? What lifestyle do you expect? What things to do want to do?[2]
    • Identify a long-term goal. Try, again, writing it down and be as specific as possible. “I want to retire at 50” is not as specific and achievable as a goal as saying “I want to be debt-free, own my own home, and be able to retire at 50 on an annual income of at least $50,000.” The latter sets concrete benchmarks for success.
    • Start to brainstorm pathways to success. How can you get there? What sort of job will you need? How much will you need to save every year?
  4. Formulate a plan. A long-term goal needs long-term vision. You will have to have a clear idea of how you want to get from Point A in your life to Point B, keeping in mind that you might have to take unexpected detours through Points C and D. You will also need a timetable and benchmarks.
    • Consider breaking up your ambition into smaller parts. This will make the plan less daunting and help to keep you motivated, working toward smaller, incremental goals.[3]
    • Be specific again about timelines and what you want to achieve within a given time. For example, rather than just saying “Retire at 50,” think in terms of “By age 30 I want to have $200,000 in stable and growing investments. By age 40 I want to be 75% of the way to my financial goal.” Ambitious? Yes, but concrete.
    • You can even break steps into substeps, each with its own plan. For example, how do you intend to invest $200,000 before age 30? You’ll need to set aside enough money, talk to a financial adviser, and develop an investment plan. [2]

Carrying Out Your Plan

  1. Put your plan into action. Now is the time to take the first step. Put the plan into action. Consult with people who can help you, find resources, and begin to work toward your long-term goal. It is all up to you now.
    • Seek expert help. For instance, if you’re interested in getting in shape, talk to a personal trainer. If your goal is financial, talk to a financial adviser.
    • Inform yourself and utilize resources. You can teach yourself a lot about investment, for example, through personal research or by taking a financial planning course.
    • Most importantly, be proactive. Your goals will not come true through wishful thinking.
  2. Develop willpower. Stay focused on your long-term vision. You may have to make some sacrifices on the way, and for this you will need to discipline – willpower. Willpower is the ability to resist short-term temptations in order to achieve larger goals.[4] You practice it by going to the gym when you feel like sleeping in or by doing an extra hour of work while your favorite show is on.
    • Cultivate discipline. Studies show that students, for example, who exhibit more willpower generally perform better. Avoid procrastination, as well, as you are prioritizing short-term satisfaction.
    • Get into a routine that helps you make progress toward your desires. For example, it will be easier to be physically healthy if you stick to an exercise schedule. If your goals are financial, sticking to a budget can do the same.
    • Develop habits that keep you on track while avoiding ones that derail your progress. For example, avoid going to the mall if you tend to make impulsive purchases. Make a habit of immediately depositing part of each paycheck so that you can meet your savings goals.
  3. Keep an eye on progress. As you work toward your dreams and aspirations, keep an eye on how things are going. Have you met benchmarks? Are you still following your timeline? What short-term goals have you met? Recognizing how far you have come is important to carrying out your plan and to staying motivated.[5]
    • For one thing, taking stock of progress will allow you to make necessary adjustments. What if you failed to meet one of your benchmarks? You tried hard but only saved $100,000 by age 30. You might need to tweak your long-term goal, either by moving retirement age back or by committing to save more.
    • You may find that your plan needs to be changed. Maybe your original goal was too ambitious. A house, insurance, and a family cost more than you ever planned and might mean that an early retirement is impractical.
    • Progress is also a very powerful motivator. By seeing how far you have moved toward a short-term or long-term goal, you will normally get a mental boost.[6]
  4. Celebrate little wins. The road to your dream in life will be long. As you trace your progress, take pride in passing all the milestones. Celebrate when you meet short-term or long-term goals and you should find yourself refreshed and re-energized. [5]
    • Recognize what you have accomplished by pausing, reflecting, and treating yourself. Did you finally run a full marathon? This calls for a toast! Or perhaps you got a long-desired promotion? Go out for a special dinner in celebration.
    • These small wins show progress. They show you moving slowly but steadily toward your desire, which will help you to stay focused on the long-term.

Overcoming Obstacles

  1. Identify obstacles as they arise. Reviewing your progress should make you aware of any minor or major obstacles to meeting your long-term goals. What's important to realize what the underlying cause is and to address it. Inaction will only set back your efforts.
    • Try to get to the bottom of any issues. What is the cause? Be honest with yourself. Say that you have not been saving enough. Is it an income issue – are you not making enough money? Or are you spending too much? Maybe it is an issue of time, and you need to put in more hours.
    • Resolve to do what it takes to accomplish your goals. If you are facing a major obstacle, re-evaluate your plan and try to adjust.
    • Some things are beyond our control. You may face illness, job trouble, or family issues that hamper your long-term vision. Focus instead on what you can control.
  2. Be adaptable. There is a good chance that you’ll have setbacks on the road to your dreams. While discouraging, you shouldn’t let this derail you. It is important to be flexible and to adjust. Adaptable people are able to take control, find alternatives, and to move past setbacks.[7]
    • First of all, don’t panic. Failure may be difficult but it is not the end of the world. Remember to have reasonable expectations and try to look for the opportunities that arise from a setback.
    • Adjust accordingly. Say that your original dream did not pan out. You don’t have enough money to retire early at 50. But can you compromise? Can you work part-time for ten or fifteen more years, saving more money? By then you’ll still be well-off and at a normal retirement age.
    • Keeping a backup plan is a good idea. Hopefully you will have worked out different scenarios and tried to anticipate setbacks. Having a clear Plan B in place is smart. Can you continue to work? Will a career change help you to meet your goal?
  3. Learn from failures. Consider a setback a way to learn. Highly motivated people are able to use failures to learn, to adjust, to grow, and to move forward. Try to do likewise and to take the most out of your setbacks.[8]
    • Assess what went wrong. Look first at your planning.[9] Did you not anticipate an obstacle? Did you not give yourself enough time? Was it a failure on your part or something outside of your control?
    • Look at your preparation. Say that you lost ground on your financial planning because you had to dip into your investments because of an emergency. Was this setback unavoidable? Or did you not have enough of an emergency fund set aside?
    • Evaluate your execution. Try to honestly judge your effort. Was it consistent? Did you take missteps or did the setback have to do with external factors?[9]
    • After you have assessed your effort, try to use what you have learned from it. Going forward, make sure not to repeat the same errors or to anticipate similar problems.

Warnings

  • Realize that not all things happen overnight. It may take some time, but nothing is outside your grasp if you're determined to do it.

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Sources and Citations

  1. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/notes-self/201308/how-set-goals
  2. ↑ 2.0 2.1 http://www.goal-setting-guide.com/long-term-goals/
  3. ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/glassheel/2013/03/14/6-ways-to-achieve-any-goal/
  4. ↑ http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/willpower.aspx
  5. ↑ 5.0 5.1 https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/long-term-focus.htm
  6. ↑ https://hbr.org/2011/05/the-power-of-small-wins/
  7. ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/24/adaptable-people-habits_n_5508678.html
  8. ↑ http://www.inc.com/peter-economy/12-habits-of-extraordinarily-motivated-people.html</ref
  9. ↑ 9.0 9.1 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/guy-winch-phd/learning-from-failure_b_4037147.html
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