Juggle a Girlfriend and Video Gaming

Are you tired of being nagged by your girlfriend when you're trying to play video games? Don't despair, there are plenty of ways to get your girlfriend to accept your "addiction". Maybe you can even get her to embrace it!

Steps

  1. Try the procedure outlined in How to Get Your Girlfriend to Play Video Games. You might end up fighting over who gets to play their favorite video game, but that's a much better problem to have than arguing over not spending enough time together.
  2. Help find activities that she can do whilst you are gaming. This could be a new hobby that she's always wanted to try, or regular meet-ups with her friends. That way, she has something fulfilling to do, while you play video games. Stay away from hobbies like dancing though - she might just sucker you into joining her!
  3. See if there is something she can do around you while you play video games. If she loves to read, maybe she can submerge herself in her favorite book while you indulge in your video games. There are also activities like knitting, crochet, and painting that will keep her busy, but you can still feel like you're spending some time together by being in the same room. Be encouraging with whatever she chooses - after you finish your game, ask her how her book/knitting/painting is going. Another idea is to have a second TV in the room that she can watch while you play.
  4. Make sure you're spending enough time with her, in general. If all you want to do is play video games, even if it means spending little or no time with her, that's not enough for most girls, and your relationship might be on thin ice. If you give her enough attention and reassurance when you're not playing video games, however, she might not feel the need to fight to regain the time you devote to video games.
  5. Include your girlfriend in "game-time" decisions. Relationships benefit from honesty and inclusion. Talk with your girlfriend about why playing video games is important to you. If you play online games with your friends, explain that this is your way of connecting and sharing an interest with your friends. If you play games on your own, this is your way of relaxing and enjoying yourself, just as she has her relaxation time doing things she enjoys. It's okay to have different interests.
  6. Make a plan together of when you can both do activities that you enjoy apart. Plan when you can spend time apart, that works well for both of you. For example, if she goes to Yoga on Monday and Thursday nights, this would be an ideal time for you to plan ahead and arrange game-time by yourself or with friends.
  7. Plan time to spend together. Be sure to include time doing something together in your plan, so that you can both look forward to times when you can connect with each other. When you've agreed times to spend together, you can both be much more present together, knowing that any self-relaxation time is already catered for.
  8. Honor your agreement. Sticking to these boundaries will help you both achieve regular time apart doing what you enjoy. Compromise is also important in any relationship, so make sure that you're not asking for what you both agree may be too much game-time. Honoring the agreement shows respect for the relationship, and for your girlfriend.



Tips

  • Find a gamer girlfriend. They do exist.
  • Remember, good hygiene and daily exercise are part of maintaining a girlfriend too. Make sure you haven't dropped your character from when you've first started dating.
  • Don't constantly discuss gaming. Your GF might not like you gaming all the time, but she'll like your talking about it when you're not gaming even less. Reminding her how much you enjoy gaming when you're not might make her feel like you're not enjoying your time with her.
  • Consider that you may actually need to ease up on the gaming. It's a hard pill to swallow for a hardcore gamer, but if you feel the pull to sit at the keyboard stronger than the pull to spend time with loved ones, you may have a problem. Gaming can be as bad an addiction as nearly any other, and can have many of the same bad side effects (like losing girlfriends or wives). Do what you have to do, but in the end, games won't offer the fulfillment you can get from human relationships.
  • Try to say something like "I love you" (along with a nice, affectionate hug) before she goes anywhere that she may encounter other women. This will ensure she leaves with a smile, and the claws don't come out when she starts complaining about you to all her friends.
  • Be honest. Tell your girlfriend how much time you (reasonably) would like to spend playing video games. Explain how much you enjoy playing, and that you want to play at certain times for certain reasons. Outline a schedule of the times you'd like to play, so that you can make plans with her for the times you're not. Then, STICK TO IT!

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Sources and Citations

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