Relax Without Relaxation Techniques

Often, the inability to relax stems from a racing brain. Getting control of "mind chatter" is more than half the battle. Here's what I do.

Steps

Lie down on your back somewhere where you are unobstructed
Completely relax all of your muscles. Let your arms and legs sink into the surface beneath them.
Close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing. Regulate it with slow breaths in through your nose and hold for a second, and then slowly exhale out of your mouth.
Listen to your "mind chatter" for a moment. Are there a billion things running around in there?
One by one, let your thoughts go. Tell yourself you can take up those thoughts later on.
Try to clear your mind, especially of negative "mind chatter" and concentrate on your breathing.
Bring up a thought that makes you feel relaxed, such as floating on a lake on a warm summer's day with the sun beating down on you, and a gentle breeze blowing across you.
Think to yourself that you are perfectly calm and relaxed, totally healthy, and happy. Let your "mind chatter" focus on those thoughts and nothing else.
Continue the slow breathing... in through the nose, out through the mouth.

Keep your eyes closed while breathing and keep saying I am calm and your mind and body will follow. Do not focus on what is around you just focus on your relaxation and nothing else.
If you are having trouble keeping thoughts out of your mind, it may help to count your breaths. By focusing attention on your breathing, you become more aware of your body naturally. This may help it to calm down and settle into a slow rhythm. Breathe slowly, and say to yourself: "I am relaxed. I am calm."
When in the midst of a busy day, you can still do this. If you are sitting at your desk, take a minute and close your eyes. Do the slow breathing and repeat your thoughts that you are perfectly calm and relaxed. Picture yourself in that place where you were the most calm and relaxed.
If you can't relax because you have many things to do the next day that you might forget, write them down and put it somewhere you know you'll see it the next day.
Something else that can help if you are having trouble relaxing enough to do anything calmly is to accept whatever you are feeling. Instead of trying to get rid of it, try to work with it, you will naturally start to relax as long as you aren't in conflict with yourself. This is sometimes the only thing that will help with your anxiety.
It is hard to relax with "mind chatter". If your thoughts are racing in 100 directions, you can't relax. The key is to calm your thoughts. Your body will follow.

If you're tense and all worked up about how this might be yet another failure, it will not work. These things take time and practice. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt and try it for a few days.

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