Avoid Laughing at Your Own Jokes

Have you ever spoiled a joke by laughing? Do you struggle to get through your jokes without rolling on the floor? Whether you are telling casual jokes to family and friends or getting on stage before an audience, controlling your laughter is an important skill. Learning to control your own laughter involves rehearing, feeling calm and comfortable, improving your comedy skills (so that other people laugh instead of you), and sometimes using a few tricks to curb your impulse to laugh.

Steps

Telling Jokes for an Audience

  1. Be prepared. The worst mistake you can make is to walk into a comedy set completely cold. This sets you up for nervously laughing at your own jokes! Even the best comedians need to spend some time preparing what they are going to say. [1]
    • Create a set list for yourself. Make a list of each joke you will tell.
    • Think about transitions. How does one joke flow into the next? Is there some kind of logical progression?
    • Keep in mind what kind of people you expect to see in the audience. Certain demographics will be more or less likely to enjoy certain types of jokes. An open mic at a church, for example, may not be the best place to try out very dirty material.
  2. Rehearse jokes. Whether you’re the type of comic who follows a script or one who tends to free-style, rehearsal will always make your set better. Plus, it is the most effective way to stop yourself from laughing at your own jokes. Set aside time to run through your entire set 2-3 times before you take the stage.[2]
    • The more times you rehearse your jokes, the more normalized they become, and the less likely you are to laugh.
    • Be sure to time yourself. This way you’ll ensure that you have the right amount of material, and you can move through your set without concerning yourself with time.
  3. Warm up for a Play before taking the stage. Taking the stage cold sets you up for nervous laughter. Before you take the stage, find a way to warm yourself up, and release any “silly energy.”
    • Put on your favorite song and dance around making funny noises and goofy faces in the mirror.
    • Laugh at yourself.
    • Move your body, use your voice, and wiggle the muscles in your face.
    • All of these actions dispel nervous energy and prepare you to tell jokes on stage effectively, without bursting into laughter.
  4. Sharpen your comedy skills. If you do a good job of making the people around you laugh, you won’t need to laugh to fill the silence. Prevent yourself from laughing at your own jokes by making other people laugh.[3]
    • Use vocal variation. Don’t fall into a monotone delivery.
    • Signal the punchline. Pause for a moment to let the audience know it’s coming.
    • Use a call-back. Reference something funny you said near the beginning of your set near the end. Audiences love this.
  5. Perform regularly. If you really want to strengthen your comedy and prevent yourself from laughing at your own jokes, the only true remedy is spending as much time as you can telling jokes on stage. You can’t perform once a month (or less) and expect to improve at your craft. Try to make it out 1-3 times per week.[1]
    • Begin by seeking out comedy open mics. You can find these advertised at coffee shops or bars, or in a local entertainment paper.
    • Open mics are where you can practice, connect with other comics, and gain exposure.
    • If you do well at open mics, you will be invited to perform at more regular gigs.

Telling Casual Jokes

  1. Work on a few “staple” jokes. If you want to tell jokes at parties, you could benefit from preparing some “staple” jokes. If you have some jokes or stories that have been rehearsed (and that you know are funny), you can use these to break the ice. Best of all, the more times you tell a joke, the better it becomes and the less likely you are to laugh.[2]
    • Think back to the wildest thing that has ever happened to you. Can you tell this story in a humorous way? Be sure to include all the major details, and include one joke or funny outburst every few sentences. Keep your story under 5 minutes.
    • Another alternative is to think up some thematically appropriate jokes. For example, if you will be attending a non-profit ball, you can try something like, "How many board members does it take to change a light bulb? Response: Six! One to change the light bulb, and five more to divert the founder!"
  2. Try to relax. Laughing at your own jokes in usually the result of nervousness or feeling awkward. Focus on the experience of telling the joke, and try not to even think about whether or not anyone will laugh. This helps to curb the knee-jerk reaction of nervous laughter following your punchline.[4]
    • You can relax yourself by taking deep breaths. Breath in to a count of 4, 5, or 6, and try to make your exhale the same length.
    • Alternatively, you can count your breaths. Try to take 10 slow, deep inhales and exhales.
  3. Let it go. If the people in your company don’t laugh at your joke, just let it go. Don’t try to encourage them to laugh by explaining the joke, or by laughing maniacally. This only comes off as desperation, and nothing is less funny than that.
    • Try to believe in your joke. If you believe what you’re saying is funny, other people will hear this in your voice.

Controlling Your Laughter

  1. Diffuse your jokes through repetition. Have you ever tried repeating a word so many times that it ceases to sound like a real word at all? This same idea can be used for jokes. If you’ve got a particular joke that seems to inspire your own laughter, try saying this joke as many times as possible. Say it while you’re driving, while you’re preparing breakfast, or while you are in the shower. Say the joke so many times that it loses it’s power.[2]
  2. Pinch yourself. If you feel the tickle of an uncontrollable laugh coming on, try giving yourself a pinch. Inflicting yourself with just a little bit of pain will be enough of a mental distraction to halt the laugh in its tracks.
  3. Hold your breath. Another simple trick to stop an oncoming laugh is to exhale the air from your lungs, and then hold it. Just stop breathing for a few seconds (you can count to five in your head). This helps to break the cycle you are in, and switch off your instinct to laugh.
  4. Think of something sad. Just as actors use sad memories from their lives to inspire tears on stage, you can use a sad memory to halt a laugh. When you feel a laugh taking hold of you, think quickly of the saddest memory you’ve got. This will interrupt your laugh.
  5. Make your laughter part of the joke. If you should happen to laugh anyway, consider making it part of the joke. Sometimes owning up to the laugh can be even funnier.[5]
    • Note that, usually, a little snort is a lot less disruptive than a long bout of hysterical laughter. If you need to let out a little laugh, try not to make it long and drawn out. A short laugh can add to the joke telling experience, but a long laugh will almost always distract from it.
    • Consider Jimmy Fallon’s habit of breaking on The Tonight Show, or comedian Tig Notaro bringing her laughing mother-in-law on stage to tell a joke.
    • Try making your compulsion to laugh part of the joke.
  6. Try to focus on the reaction to your joke. Instead of focusing on the words of the joke itself, look at the people to whom you're telling the joke. Are they laughing? Did they find your joke funny? Make mental notes about who laughed and what their favorite parts of your joke seemed to be. It's hard to laugh at your own joke when you're thinking about something else.

Sources and Citations