Begin a Conversation With Nothing to Talk About

Are you ever at a loss for words when you want to start a conversation? Do you ever wish you are more talkative? I do, so I thought about it and came up with a great solution.

Steps

Ask Questions

  1. On your free time, get a small piece of paper. This can be anything. An index card, a notebook paper, or a sticky note. It doesn't matter.
  2. Write down a question you have for someone. It can be anything from "how are you/what have you been doing?" or "have you seen any good movies lately?" Try to keep the question open ended. Depending on how much time you have, to be friendly just ask how they are. It's not much but it's still a good start.
  3. Next time you see someone you kind of know, ask them one of the questions you wrote down.
  4. Next time you see someone else, ask another question, or the same question you asked the first person. But try to ask different ones also.
  5. Once they answer the question, respond. Have you seen the movie? They don't need to ask, just say if you have seen it. Did you like the movie? Why/why not?
  6. Whenever there is a silent moment ask one of your questions to break the silence.
  7. Once you get to know a new person, or someone you just never really know, make a new list. Make this list different, make it things about them. Is there something they like to do? Ask them how it's going, ask how/where they do that. Is there something you have in common with them? Talk about that.

Tell Stories

  1. Tell who ever you are talking to a story about yourself. It can be anything, if you are at the pet store and there are people looking at the same animal, talk about the animal. Do you have that kind of animal? Tell them about your pet, or you're sister/brother/daughter that wants/has one.
  2. Talk about your latest trip. Did anything interesting happen? Anything strange?
  3. Tell them something someone does that is strange. Anything unusual, interesting, strange, or something that doesn't happen everyday.
  4. Trying to keep out of personal things, talk about anything and everything on your mind.

Random Comments

  1. Make nice comments about something. Complement the person you are trying to talk to. I doesn't really matter what you say, examples:
    • "I like those shoes"
    • "Nice shirt! Where did you get it?"
  2. Ask about their stuff.
  3. Comment on anything they say. Do you shop at the store they got their shoes at? Did you notice anything about that store? Maybe you never been there and wanted to go there? Tell them WHY you wanted to go there.



Tips

  • Doing these steps will make you a more talkative person. Asking a lot of questions might make you seen as curious. Telling stories, more talkative. And comments, friendly. It depends on what you want to be.
  • It's probably not a good idea to say "I'm good" if they didn't ask how you are too. It's strange and a little rude.
  • Don't just ask a bunch of questions. Making comments can be just as good or better in some cases.
  • Pick better questions. The best one I have on this article is "Seen any good movies lately." Not only is there a lot to say about a movie, but if they haven't you can say you have. Then you can even tell them what happened. If you ask someone "how are you/what have you been doing" that gives a good chance they will say "good/nothing" then you don't have much to say.
  • Don't blame yourself if they won't talk. If you ask "what you have you been doing" and they respond with "nothing" that doesn't leave you with much to say.
  • Telling a bunch of stories might get old to others. It's best if the other people are good listeners or no one is talking about anything important.
  • Just smile at them every time when you have nothing to say. And try to think what can you ask to start a conversation, like what you like to do or did you watch the recent movie? that can make a conversation further.
  • This is great if you are trying to get to know someone. Or if you are making a simple conversation. Even if you don't want to be more talkative, this still helps conversations.

Warnings

  • If you are a good listener stick with it. Some people need to talk, some like to just listen. This could have to do with what you are meant to do. If you are meant to be a therapist then you would be a listener. A writer/author might be quiet too. Don't judge yourself just because you aren't a jabber jaw. People find that annoying sometimes. There are good things to it, but like everything else it has a dark side too.
  • If they don't want to talk it's them. Maybe they have had a bad day. Just leave it and try again later, or talk to someone else.
  • You are you, no matter what. There is a good reason you are who you are.
  • Don't expect too much from yourself the very first time you do this. It's not fair to yourself.

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