Stay Entertained While on the Toilet
Having to stay on the toilet for a really long time soon becomes boring and frustrating. If constipation or some other cause has you stuck on the old porcelain for a while, this article will help you find several ways to enjoy your time on the toilet.
Steps
- Play. If you're under 99, there is nothing like having a good play every day. Get out your favorite toys, like Lego, Gain Air on Your Tech Deck, Collect Toy Die Cast Vehicles, and other more sophisticated toys like PSP's. Be creative.
- Daydream. Think of things like sports, Learn About the Unicorn, people you may have a crush on, people you hate and want to crush, your hobbies etc.
- Make a ninja mask out of your shirt. Why not after all? And if you don't know how to do that, go here.
- Talk to yourself. It is also another good pastime on the toilet.
- Tap out a beat on your lap or maybe on the wall beside you. This can be very amusing while you're using the toilet and it might hurry things along too if you're lucky.
- Read. Reading books, Read Japanese Comics, magazines etc., is definitely one of the best ways to thrill yourself while you're on the toilet. Vampire novels are ace; hopefully it will scare you and speed up your time in the washroom.
- If you have an iPod or an MP3 (after all, who doesn't except gramps and he's got his own loo anyway), you can also listen to music when you're unloading that huge log.
- If you're behind in school or work you can also bring your homework or files in to the bathroom. Be careful though; your client doesn't want dirty smears on the paperwork.
- If you have a cell phone you can text message your best friends. It is probably best not to tell them what you're up to for real though.
- Be a rebel and sit improperly on your toilet seat. That is sure to win you accolades and followers. Well, it would if anyone saw you, so perhaps you'll just have to embellish in the retelling of your toilet tales at the watercooler.
- If you're in a public restroom, you can always draw on the walls if you have a marker on you. Naturally, this is illegal and known as destroying property, so be prepared for the consequences and the absolute rotten, stinking karma that will follow you. Then again, if the ancient Romans did it, why not you and it gives the next person something to think about too.
Tips
- Have a firm hold on the book or...to prevent them falling in the toilet.
- Make sure to flush the toilet and turn on the fan or open a window (if you have these) once you're done.
- Leave things like Lego, files, filo-faxes, Blackberrys and books in the washroom so that if it is an emergency you don't have to run around looking for them. It could be embarrassing if you do run around looking for them when in mid-use of the toilet.
Warnings
- If you're listening to your iPod be aware that there is a possibility that you might drop it in to the toilet.
- If you talk to yourself, don't talk too loudly because people may think you're crazy.
- If you text message your friends don't tell them you're on the toilet it may disgust them.
- Don't drop any of your playthings down the toilet.
- Don't drink the water. Not even after it has flushed. Go to the kitchen for that.
Things You'll Need
- Toys for ages 9 through 99
- Books, magazines, comics, work files
- Blackberry or cell phone
- iPod or MP3 or that cranky old stereo from 1343
- Marker
- Loo paper
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