Act Drunk

Being drunk on alcohol can reduce your motor skills, cognitive functions, and inhibitions. Many people will act very differently when inebriated. You may eventually find yourself in a situation where you have to act drunk, but don't want to get drunk. You could have a desire to fit in during a social gathering, be assigned a role in a performance, or just want to trick your friends. If you're willing to change the way you look, speak, and act, then you can convince everyone around you that you're actually drunk.

Steps

Looking Drunk

1. Mess up your hair. When you're drunk, you start to overlook things about your appearance that you would usually care about when sober. Run your fingers through your hair and intentionally mess it up. The more outrageous and disheveled you look, the drunker you'll appear.
   • Having messy hair tells other people that you don't care about being perfect and are here for a good time.
   • It could also make people think that you've been partying.
2. Stain your shirt. Alcohol reduces cognitive function. For that reason, many drunk people will drop things frequently. Many times, this includes food and drink. Put ketchup or mustard stains on your shirt and act like you don't notice it or that you don't care.
   • If someone mentions the stain, respond by saying "Yeah, I know. I don't care."
   • You can use other things to create stains, but avoid dairy products or any other food that would produce an odor.
3. Tuck in half your shirt. Tucking your shirt in half way will enhance how oblivious you look, and people will mistake it for being drunk. Make sure that it doesn't look intentional, or else people won't associate it with drunken behavior. Try to make it look like you just used the bathroom.
   • Tucking your shirt in half way could be a fashion statement.
4. Make your eyes look bloodshot. Glazed and bloodshot eyes are a common sign of drunkenness. There are safe and natural ways to make your eyes naturally red. To do this, rub a small amount of freshly cut onion, menthol, or peppermint oil under your eye to make them appear redder.
   • You can also try crying or blinking several times to make your eyes look redder.
   • Redness occurs because alcohol can swell the blood vessels in your eyes and makes them appear red.
   • Make sure that the peppermint oil, menthol, or onion does not make direct contact with your eye.

Acting Drunk

1. Act like you're drunk but trying to act sober. A big part of acting drunk is to embody the feelings and emotional outlook of someone who is drunk. Typically when people get really drunk, they try to act sober to fit in. This can be difficult because you'll need to assume the perspective of someone who does not want to appear to be drunk while still convincing people that you are. Look like you're trying to keep your composure but slip up occasionally and act drunk. You can say something silly or outrageous and then tell everyone that you're sorry and you didn't mean to say it. Don't go overboard or overact. This may tip people off.
   • Lean against a wall and then stand upright, as if you're trying to regain your balance.
   • You can say something like "No, no, I'm totally fine. I don't think I had enough to drink."
   • Being loud and socially inappropriate does not necessarily equate to being drunk. However, being accidentally inappropriate can make you look drunk.
2. Act less inhibited than you normally would. The effects of alcohol can lead to increased aggression, self-disclosure, and sexual inhibition. Be more open and honest than you normally would. Say things that you wouldn't say regularly. Go off on tangents and talk about your childhood. If you're going for the "angry drunk" act, then get angry in response to minor things. Act more flirtatious and be more willing to talk about your history and childhood.
   • You can say things like, "Onion rings. I remember when I ate my first onion ring. I was seven--no, I was six years old."
   • Touch people more often. Touching someone's arm or pushing their shoulder is an act of flirtation.
   • You can make sexually suggestive or inappropriate comments to appear drunker. Just remember not to cross the line and harass anyone.
3. Take a long time to do things. Cognitive and problem-solving skills are reduced when there's alcohol in your system. Often, it will take drunk people longer to understand things. Act like you don't understand simple things. You can accomplish this by asking repeated questions or repeating what a person is saying. When asked to do something, take twice as long as you'd usually take, and constantly ask the person for help.
   • Changing the channel on the TV or a song on a mp3 player is a great opportunity to seem like you don't know what you're doing.
   • When trying to change the channel you can say, "I don't get it. It keeps going to the menu. I don't know what I'm doing."
4. Keep an inconsistent pace. Move erratically and go from energetic to drained in minutes. The more inconsistent you are, the most natural you'll appear. Act randomly and surprise people. The more you change your mood, tone of voice, and volume, the drunker you'll look.
5. Stumble when you walk. A common theater technique to act drunk involves you envisioning the floor moving under you while you walk. Make sure not to overdo it and lose your balance and fall over all the time because it can come off as fake. Act as if you are slightly off-balance constantly.
   • You can also lean against walls when you're stationary to give off this effect.
   • Another approach is to roll back on your heels and act as if you are trying to get back on your toes.
6. Smell like you're drunk. You can swish liquor in your mouth, or put it on your clothes. If you don't drink, try drinking a non-alcoholic beverage because they still smell like alcohol. Smelling like liquor will give people the impression that you've been drinking.
   • Examples of non-alcoholic beverages that still smell like they have alcohol include Miller Sharp's, O'Doul's Premium, Beck's Non-Alcoholic, and Clausthaler Golden Amber.

Speaking Like You're Drunk

1. Slur your words. Drinking can negatively affect your motor skills and can slur your speech. To slur, draw out parts of the word that you normally wouldn't. Think of how you would talk if you were very tired. If you want to appear very drunk, slur your words more.
   • You can say something like, "I absolutely love this party. It's so great."
   • Another example would be, "So what're  you doin' next week?"
2. Speak slower than usual. Just as alcohol affects the way you speak, it can also affect how quickly you can talk. When people are drunk, they will speak slower. Listen to the pace of your voice as you have conversations with people and slow it down if you're talking too fast.
   • Alcohol can affect the speed in which neurotransmitters communicate with your brain, which slows down your speech.
3. Be louder than usual and ignore personal space. When you're in a loud setting like a bar, party, or club, it's natural that you'll have to speak louder than usual for people to hear you over the music. When you're drunk, however, sometimes you don't realize how loud you are because of reduced cognitive function. Shout in people's faces, and get closer to them than you typically would.
   • If a person tells you to back off then be polite and walk away.
4. Deny being drunk when people ask. When people ask if you're drunk, you should act offended but admit to having a couple of drinks. No one likes admitting that they have had too much to drink, so if you openly tell people that you're drunk, they may not believe you. Act defensive, and people will believe that you're drunk.
   • You can say something like, "I've only had a couple of drinks. I'm not drunk!"

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Sources and Citations

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