Annoy People in Elevators

An elevator is almost the perfect environment to be a prankster. It’s easy to annoy people when you are cramped in such a small, tight space. Because elevator rides usually last less than a minute, make sure your pranks are quick and have a lot of punch. When annoying people on an elevator, keep your pranks lighthearted and fun as opposed to mean-spirited so that everyone leaving the elevator will have a pleasant story to tell.

Steps

Using the Elevator to Annoy People

1. Push all the buttons. When you get into the elevator, push the button for every floor. This makes everyone’s ride on the elevator longer, if only for a few seconds. If you want to take it a step further, look around questioningly at everyone in the elevator when no one gets off at the floors you pushed.
   • When someone comes in, say, "I've got this," before you push all of the buttons.
   • You can also push all the buttons as you reach the floor you are getting off at.
   • If someone asks you why you pushed all the buttons, you can honestly say, "It was just a joke!"
2. Make a dinging noise at each floor. Every time the elevator reaches a new floor, say “ding!” very loudly. You can even sing the word “ding” on each floor like notes in a scale, getting higher as you reach each new floor.
   • You can make other noises if you prefer, such as a bird cawing or an explosion sound every time a button is pushed.
3. Talk to your reflection in the mirror. Many elevators have mirrors on the walls. A great way to be mischievous in an elevator is to carry on a running commentary while you look at yourself in the mirror.
   • You could look at yourself, turning to catch different angles and say “All right, all right, now we’re talking,” very loudly.
   • You could also keep adjusting your shirt or your hair, keeping a running dialogue about what look is best for you.
   • Stand in the corner of the elevator facing the wall. Don't say anything the whole ride.
4. Dance to the elevator music. Many elevators play music in the background, usually soft rock or smooth jazz. If you’re in an elevator that is playing music, start to dance. Start just bobbing your head and tapping your feet, and then get your whole body into it. Take up as much space as you can to dance until everyone is staring at you.
5. Announce every floor. At every floor, make a loud announcement telling everyone the floor number. Say something like “Everyone going to floor ten, get off now! No time to dilly dally!”
   • You can also pretend to conduct people onto the elevator, saying “All aboard the elevator train!”
6. Exclaim that you've lost a beast. When the elevator is going from the bottom floor to the top, as soon as the doors close, exclaim that you lost your tarantula/snake/scorpion but confirm that it is somewhere in the elevator.
   • Most people will probably see that this is a joke. However, if somebody looks seriously alarmed or is starting to panic, let them know that you were not being serious.
7. Build in or add something to the elevator. For example, build a Lego city in the middle of the elevator. Lay a Twister mat on the floor and ask people if they want to play.
8. Talk to people. When there are a lot of people, say, "You're probably wondering why I've gathered you here today."

Being Loud

1. Sing a repetitive song. Being loud is one of the easiest ways to annoy people. Singing a song is a great way to get under peoples’ skin since songs can easily get stuck in your head. Sing a short song like “It’s a Small World” over and over again to vex your fellow passengers.
   • What’s even more annoying than hearing someone sing a song over and over again is when they get the words wrong. Pick a popular song but get the words slightly wrong to really be annoying.
2. Play loud music. Use your phone or a portable radio to play loud, repetitive music. You can even sing along with it to be especially annoying, or dance like you’re in a club.
3. Play a musical instrument badly. Bring an instrument like a guitar or an accordion into the elevator. Start playing it and making random notes and chords without playing a song. It’s even more annoying when the instrument is especially loud or off-key.
4. Read to yourself loudly. Bring a book into the elevator and start reading loudly. Pretend to not notice people looking at you, and act as though it’s completely normal.
5. Clear your throat every few seconds. Even though it’s not a loud sound, the sound of someone clearing their throat repeatedly can be extremely annoying. Clear your throat as you get on the elevator. Wait a couple seconds and do it again. Keep clearing your throat until you get off.
6. Don't be a jerk. It's a fine line between being lighthearted and mischievous and being a jerk. Aim to brighten the day of your fellow passengers instead of making an annoying racket. Start out quietly, then if the passengers seem amused, continue your prank. If the passengers look annoyed or irritated, don't keep going.

Acting Eccentric

1. Stare at people. Staring at people is especially creepy in an elevator since you are in such close proximity with your fellow passengers. When someone notices you staring, don’t look away. Instead, widen your eyes and tilt your head so you look especially bizarre.
   • When there is only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and pretend it wasn't you.
2. Pretend you have an imaginary friend. Carry on an animated one-sided conversation with an imaginary friend. Pause every couple seconds like you are listening to his replies and act as though you are responding to his questions and comments.
   • Hold the door open, pretending to wait for a friend. After a few seconds, pretend to greet your imaginary friend saying, “Come in Jonathan, what took you so long?”
   • Have your arm around an imaginary person, and whenever someone comes near, say, "You popped Bubble Buddy!"
3. Pretend you’re an alien. Pretend that you’re observing everyone on the elevator as part of an alien study. Mutter to yourself periodically, “interesting, these humans” while you make notes on a notepad.
   • Pretend to talk into a tape recorder and say something like, “Day 34. Inside a small rectangular box called an elevator. It seems to be an extremely slow method that humans use to transport themselves.”
   • Roll up into a ball and cringe in the corner mumbling disturbing things to yourself, like "They are coming!" or "You're next, you're next!"
4. Keep moving around. Instead of standing still and waiting for the elevator to arrive at your floor, move around constantly. Stand in one spot for a few seconds, then shake your head and move to the opposite side of the elevator. Keep moving like you’re trying to find the optimal place to stand.
5. Tap people on the shoulder. Stand behind someone and tap them on their shoulder. When they look around, give them a questioning look. After they turn back, wait a couple seconds and do it again.
6. Reveal the joke at the end of the ride. If you don't let your fellow passengers in on the joke, they may interpret your eccentricity as creepiness. This is especially true for staring at people and tapping their shoulder. At the end of the ride, say something like, "I wanted you all to know that I was just messing with you! Enjoy the rest of your day!"

Tips

• It’s better to be subtle with your pranks than to really make someone mad. Try not to cross the line, especially since you likely don’t know your fellow passengers.
• Get a friend to join in to make your antics twice as funny!
• Try to give people a story they can talk about later. Don’t be afraid to be weird: you probably won’t ever see these people again!
• Run into the elevator with a scared look on your face, then hide under someone or clutch their knees, and after the doors close, say innocently, "Are they gone?".
• Carry a big box labeled "Toenails".
• Pretend you're drowning.
• Run up to someone and say, "I finally found you! Why did you leave me!? It has been years!".
• Offer to spit-shine peoples' shoes for a dollar.
• When there is only one person in the elevator with you, stand really close to them and say, "Sorry, it's crowded." But don't move.
• Sit in the middle of an elevator and pretend to meditate.

Sources and Citations

See also

• Compromise
• Impress Adults
• Be Social
• Attract an ISTJ Personality
• Respond to Nosy Questions from Others
• Show Someone You Appreciate Them
• Fist Bump
• Ask a Girl to Hang Out
• Impress a Guy
• Relate to an Autistic Person

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