Be Cocky
Do you feel like no one appreciates your talents? Are you tired of other people walking all over you? It's time to get cocky! Follow the steps in this guide to re-invent yourself as a confident, take-charge individual. You'll learn to appreciate yourself, think and act confidently, and, most importantly, strut down the street like you own the place.
Contents
Steps
Thinking Cocky
- Believe that you're the best. Cockiness comes from a confidence (many would say "arrogance") that you're the most competent, most interesting, best-looking person in the room (even if you're not!) You also need to believe the reverse - that most of the people you meet are all dull, boring, and/or incompetent. If you sincerely believe that you're number one and that almost everyone else can't touch you, the following steps will be much easier. They may even start to fall into place on their own.
- Try to mentally elevate and venerate the things you're good at while giving little importance to the things you're bad at. Are you a great student but a bad athlete? Then think like this: "I'm the smartest person I know. I'm going to land a sweet job one day. Who cares about these meat-head jocks that people seem to like so much? Sports aren't important - these guys will be washing my car in just a few years."
- Take it for granted that everyone loves you. A cocky person is the life of the party - any party. S/he is the reason that people are having fun. Keep this mentality at social gatherings - since everyone already likes you, you can skip boring small talk and get right to the interesting topics, like yourself! Assume a certain level of familiarity with everyone - if everyone's your friend, you can jump right into their conversations and even lightly tease them (like a friend would.)
- For instance, let's say a cocky person has just arrived at a party. She sees a semi-close acquaintance having a conversation with someone in the corner. The cocky person might, without hesitation, wordlessly sneak up on her acquaintance, remaining just out of his line of sight, then chime in to the conversation unexpectedly as a shocking, funny prank. The assumption of familiarity is crucial - a less cocky person might have simply walked up to her acquaintance, made an awkward, stilted introduction, then excused herself from the conversation.
- Sincerity is key here. People naturally look to others for social cues, so the more you sincerely believe that you're the center of attention, the more other people will too.
- Let your opinions be known. The only time a cocky person is indecisive is when s/he is deciding which supermodel to ask out first. Cocky people have a strong opinion on almost everything and they're almost never afraid to share it. They don't worry about offending others because they know that they're right - if someone else doesn't want to admit it, that's not the cocky person's problem. A cocky person isn't afraid of a good debate - after all, he's sure to win because he knows he's right.
- On the other hand, a cocky person won't ever embarrass himself by getting too emotionally invested in an argument. He feels no need to waste energy yelling or resorting to personal insults. After all, he's right, so why would he need to?
- A cocky person won't refrain from correcting someone out of politeness. Let's say his history teacher mistakenly says that East and West Germany reunited in 1989, not 1990. He will raise his hang and politely (but firmly) explain the teacher's mistake: "Excuse me, I think Germany was formally reunited in 1990. My Grandma was there."
- Assume that everyone thinks you're hot. Knowing that someone desires you is a big confidence booster - imagine how your confidence will skyrocket if you simply assume that everyone thinks you're hot stuff! Take great pride in your looks and your charm. Are you wearing a new outfit for the first time? Hold your head high - be confident that everyone's admiring you. Give an alluring smile to the guy that you're interested in. If you believe that everyone already is in love with you, you've got no reason to worry.
- Truly cocky people exude an air of easy confidence, so even if you've put a great deal of effort into your appearance or behavior, act as if it's effortless. If complimented on a bold style choice, say "Oh this? Just something I found in the closet" rather than "It took me four hours to put together, so I sure hope it looks good!"
- Don't let haters get you down. It's sad, but true: no matter how excellent you are, you'll eventually run into people who refuse to give you the respect you deserve. You might even run into the occasional person who doesn't like you. Don't bother with such small-minded people. If they don't love you, there's something wrong with them, not you.
- Haters often are aiming to get a reaction out of you. Don't give haters what they want by letting them get you angry or flustered. Casually dismiss them with a line like, "You're just jealous because you share my impeccable taste in everything."
- Get confident. Cockiness is an exaggerated form of personal confidence. To be truly cocky, you've got to have a good, self-confident foundation to work with. Cockiness without real confidence comes across as pathetic posturing, which is the opposite of what you want. Rather than seeming like you're not worried about what people think, you'll seem to be worried about what everyone thinks.
- If you're not confident, there's no magic way to become so overnight, However, to start down the path towards confidence, begin by working towards achievements that make you proud. The good feeling you get from making these achievements will fuel you make bigger achievements, and, ultimately, become more skilled, experienced, and confident.
Acting Cocky
- Let everyone know how awesome you are. Don't be afraid to share your greatness. If you've gotten the hang of thinking of yourself as the top dog, it's time to start spreading the word. Here, a little finesse is required - if you simply walk around telling everyone you meet that you're great and they're garbage, people will think you're a bully or a psychopath. Instead, just use the opportunities you get in normal conversations to slip in cocky mentions of yourself.
- For example, if your friends are discussing last weekend's big soccer game, you might say, "Yeah, Beckham's goal was alright, but his passing game was pretty sloppy. When I played club soccer, I wouldn't have let the ball get away from me so often."
- When you're in a competition against someone, it's very cocky to engage in a little trash talk. If you're competing against a romantic interest, it can even be a little flirtatious. Just make sure to keep away from low blows - if you're really cruel, you can get penalized or ejected.
- Take compliments like a champ. If you get a compliment (and you will), take it while subtly acknowledging that you already know you're the best. Instead of saying, "Really? Gee, thanks!" when you get a compliment, instead say "Thanks, that's great to hear." You want to give other people the impression that you're not surprised that everyone's jealous of you. Show the world that you expect to be adored.
- Show your achievements off. Truly cocky people have things to be cocky about. Be proud about whatever you've achieved in life. Bring these things up whenever you get the chance. Whenever you make a new achievement, relish your victory. Celebrate with your friends. Act especially confident and self-assured afterwords. You might even consider changing your appearance after you've achieved something (within reason.) After a big sports victory, you might, for instance, wear your jersey or letterman jacket to school the next day.
- Be warned - rubbing an opponent's nose in his or her failure is not good cocky behavior. It's embarrassing for everyone involved, especially you. Being a sore winner reeks of low confidence - cocky people know they're going to win ahead of time, so they're not hard on their opponents when their prediction comes true.
- Get some serious friends. A cocky person doesn't have to have millions of fake friends and hangers-on. In fact, a person who worries too much about how many friends s/he has seems insecure - the opposite of cocky. You should, however, have a posse of people you can confidently call homie, dog, bud, or pal. The knowledge that you have people you can turn to when life gets tough will make you more confident and willing to take risks. Also, good friends are great companions or wingmen for your cocky pursuits!
- Be generous with your affection. Properly applied, the sense of touch can be used create a lasting impression that you're confident about your body. However, if you're too generous with when and where you touch people, you'll be labeled a creep. This distinction can be a thin line, so to start with small, simple shows of affection. When greeting someone, give him or her a hug instead of a handshake. If someone says something funny, gently touch his or her shoulder as you laugh. Stand close to someone you like, brushing up against him or her "accidentally." Making these small affectionate gestures can go a long way towards showing you're confident and not worried about peoples' reactions to your affection - in a word, cocky.
- Cocky touching is great for flirting as long as it's used within reason. Adjust your body language to suit your partners' - if at any point s/he seems uncomfortable or creeped out, ease off on your shows of affection.
- Flirt like a player. Cocky people know they're universally desired, so they have no trouble flirting with the people that they're "in to." They approach romantic interests without hesitation. They're cool and confident when they talk to people that they "dig." They're never afraid of being rebuffed. After all, they know that people should be flattered by the opportunity to be hit on by an absolute stud!
- Cocky people are shameless when they flirt. Be scandalous! Let a person you're interested in know exactly how you feel, while stopping just short of things that you think will creep him or her out.
- Move on from life's inevitable difficulties. No one's life is perfect. Even the most confident, self-assured people in the world have to deal with periodic setbacks and problems. Take these as they come - there's no way to avoid every single hardship in life. Don't feel the need to keep up a cocky façade when you're hurting. If, for instance, you lose a beloved relative, your normal cockiness will seem very unnatural and forced. Everyone has occasional bad spells - if you pretend that you don't, you'll only make if harder to move on. Give your problems the attention they deserve and you'll eventually be back to your old cocky self.
- Cockiness is partly self-deception. Cocky people create idealized visions of themselves in their mind and and act as if these "perfect" visions are the reality, when in fact, they are not. Temporary difficulties are great opportunities for self-reflection. Ask yourself questions like "In what ways have I had an unrealistic image of myself?" and "Have I been too cocky?" Life's difficulties can act as checks on out-of-control egos and keep us from becoming insufferable narcissists.
Looking Cocky
- Keep a strong, secure posture. One great way of telegraphing to everyone in the room that you're cocky is to display this trait with confident body language. You'll want to have a broad, erect stance as your default way of standing. Keep your shoulders back and your head up while holding your chest up. It sounds crazy, but it works - changing from a slouched or slumped default posture to a more dignified one can make a marked difference on how people think of you (and how you think of yourself.)
- Show your cockiness on your face. Cocky people know that they're the coolest person to walk the face of the earth - their faces should reflect this. A cocky person is perpetually amused with himself. Keep a proud smile on your face whenever you can. When you're interacting with someone, especially if it's someone you're interested in romantically, you might want to add a little mischievousness to your expression, as if you consider the conversation to be an amusing game.
- These relatively small changes to your expression can cause significant changes in your behavior. Pretending to feel a certain way can actually make you feel that way, which will make your cockiness seem all the more natural.
- Display your cockiness in the way you move. Cocky people always know what they're doing and where they're going. Your movements should reflect this. Walk with confidence - keep your head up and your shoulders back as you take fairly quick strides toward where you want to go. Whenever possible, walk in a straight line to your desired location. Don't slow down or dawdle unless you come across something or someone who interests you.
- Ideally, you want to create the impression that everything you do is important, so walk as if you need to make an important appointment. Most people will naturally assume that you are important.
- Show off your best features. Cocky people know they're hot! Dress to show off the hottest aspects of your body. If you've got great, muscly arms, wear short sleeves to have the ladies swooning. Have you got long, sexy legs? Show them off with some tight jeans! Don't be shy - you're the best-looking person you know, so it'd be a disservice not to flaunt what you've got.
- Appear bold, not defensive. Cocky people have confidence in their opinions - the way they gesture and position their body should reflect this. Always face and make eye contact with whomever you're talking to. Generally, you should position yourself so that the front of your body is facing whoever you're engaged with - a good rule is to keep your belly button pointed at whoever's most interesting to you at a given moment. This way, even if you have to momentarily avert your gaze for some reason, the full weight of your body language is still brought to bear on who you're talking to.
- Don't appear defensive during confrontations. For instance, if you're engaged in an argument or debate, don't cross your arms and look away. Instead, point your body directly at your opponent and look him or her in the eye.
- Make gestures with confidence. If someone asks you which way is North, instead of feebly pointing with a finger held close to your body, extend your entire arm.
Tips
- Never doubt what you say be confident and be cocky.
- Always have good posture. If you ever get caught having something wrong with you, it will be held against you.
- Never, ever be boring. Always have something interesting in mind to talk about or do.
- Remember to wear sunglasses inside the school, don't consider yourself a dunce.
Warnings
- Don't act as a wannabe. Wannabes try to act all cocky, but they don't know all the details about it. They will just try to copy you.
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