Be a Heartbreaker

If you've been played one too many times, you might be thinking of turning into a heartbreaker yourself. Confidence is key. Interested in learning more? Then keep reading.

Steps

Get the Attitude

1. Have fun. Simply put, people who look like they're having fun give the impression that they are more fun to be around. One of the quickest ways to attract attention is present yourself in a fun-loving, light-hearted way.
   • This is easier to accomplish in some settings than it is in others, so choose your night-on-the-town spot carefully. For example, a club, party, or any event that involves dancing is a great avenue to showcase your fun side. In this sort of setting, dance like you don't care who watches. Doing so projects confidence and a certain carefree mood.
   • Smile often even when you don't necessarily feel like it. Laugh at jokes, even when they aren't necessarily funny.
   • Control your laugh. A tinkling, flirtatious giggle will attract more positive attention than a boisterous guffaw.
2. Set the pace. Be the person in the crowd who decides when and what to do next, and never let your opinion get neglected.
   • If a guy you flirt with suggests heading out to another spot, keep control of the situation by playfully teasing that you would rather dance/hang-out/etc. at your current location for a little while longer, even if you secretly want to go as well. Then, when the time is right, indicate that you are ready to move on. The key here is to show that the decision is on your terms, not someone else's.
   • If asked where you want to go, come up with a place, even if you aren't dying to go there. This is another way to keep things going at your pace and establish a certain control of the night.
3. Play the crowd. When in a crowd of strangers, take the chance to make eyes at a few potential targets. Some may be turned off by the notion that they have competition, but others will either accept the challenge or find your obvious self-confidence attractive.
   • Another advantage created by this situation is that you project a certain boldness, suggesting that you can be just as happy without any given man on your arm as you will be with one. This may seem counter-intuitive at first, but you are, in some ways, throwing down the proverbial gauntlet and giving the guys around you a challenge.
   • When approached by someone in particular, though, focus most of your attention on him. In order to be a heartbreaker, you will need to offer at least a little hope that the interaction might progress into something more.
4. Only reveal emotion that benefits you. Keep your deepest thoughts and feelings a mystery and only reveal the ones that may help you in your quest to be a heartbreaker.
   • Keep the conversation light and away from serious topics. Also avoid conversations that will allow the other person to get to know a lot about you, or you him.
   • If your mood suddenly sours, resist the urge to express as much outwardly. Maintain the same cool, confident demeanor and work through the situation until you can leave.

Get the Look

1. Show a little skin. The key phrase here is “a little.” Choose clothes that subtly reveal flashes of skin without looking as though you're begging for attention or trying to be trashy. Reveal enough skin to stimulate the imagination while keeping enough hidden to keep that imagination going.
   • Low-cut tops are the most obvious choice, but also the most abused. A top that shows a little cleavage can be highly effective, but if you feel that there is any risk of “falling out” of the top, it's probably more trashy than sexy.
   • The miniskirt or minidress is your next best bet. This works especially well if you have long, slender legs. As with low-cut tops, though, there is such a thing as going too far. If you are unable to sit down without flashing your unmentionables to the world, the skirt might be a touch too short. Aim for a length that you can feel comfortable and confident in.
   • Backless tops are less obvious choices, but they can be very attractive when worn right. During daily wear, the back is almost always covered. As a result, showing your back evokes a sense of intimacy without actually showing off anything inappropriate. Moreover, backless tops and dresses are difficult to abuse. Just make sure that your bra cannot be seen through the opening.
2. Flaunt your best features. Wear clothes that flatter your figure and draw attention to your best features while masking any features you may feel less-than-satisfied about.
   • If you have a wide midsection or minimal curves, highlight your natural waist by wearing a belt or choosing a top that cinches in at the waist. This also works well if you are trying to downplay large hips. By drawing attention to your waist, you accentuate the curves of your figure and balance out your overall body shape.
   • If you have a slim figure and you want to draw attention to that fact, wear tops, dresses, and skirts in straight cuts. To prevent the look from being boxy, make sure that you wear clothes that match your size. Oversized clothes will make you look frumpy.
   • If you want to draw attention to your bust, wear necklines that naturally draw the eye to the bust. Deep v-necks sweetheart necklines, and halter tops are all worth considering. Also consider wearing tops and dresses with embellishment or decoration near the neckline or bust.
   • If you want to draw attention to your hips or legs, wear skirts with a lot of detail. Think along the lines of frills, ruffles, and embellishments. On the other hand, a tight pencil skirt can also look attractive if you have the legs for it.
3. Splash on a little perfume. Wear a long-lasting perfume with a fragrance that appeals to you. Note, however, that some scents will assist you in your quest to be a heartbreaker faster than others.
   • Stay away from floral, green, and oceanic fragrances. While these scents are great for casual wear, they tend to be fairly light and may not have as strong an effect.
   • Lean toward woody, musky, and Oriental scents when choosing the right fragrance for your heartbreaker persona. These scents tend to be richer and spicier.
4. Less is more. Only spray a little perfume along the pulse points of your body--most notably, your wrists, the back of your knees, behind your ears, and at the front base of your neck. Spraying too much perfume can make it hard for people to be around you, let alone fall all over themselves to be near you.
5. Strut your stuff with the right shoes. For a night on the town, your best bet is a high heel. As with anything, knowing what type of heel to choose can make or break your look.
   • Choose a heel height you feel comfortable with. After all, if you end up tripping and falling flat on your face because you couldn't walk right, you might break an ankle but probably won't break any hearts.
   • Know that there is a limit to everything, even this. If you have to stop and ask yourself whether a pair of heels is sexy or trashy, you can bet that it will probably be the second option.
   • Strappy heels are feminine and work well with most dresses and skirts. On the other hand, heeled ankle boots can look a little more “edgy” yet just as appealing.
6. Use makeup to highlight key features. Never cake on the makeup. Instead, focus on highlighting your eyes and lips while keeping your complexion looking clear.
   • Use foundation and concealer to smooth your complexion. You can use a little powder, if desired, but keep this part of your makeup looking subtle.
   • Apply eye makeup with caution. If you really want to bring out your eyes, you will need mascara, eyeliner, and eyeshadow. Only use enough mascara to lift your eyelashes, and never apply so much that your lashes look lumpy. You can get a little creative with the eyeshadow, particularly if going out at night, but keep in mind that shadowy colors and rich gem hues tend to look better than bright, “clownish” colors.
   • Choose the right type of lip gloss or lipstick. If you have notably heavy eye makeup on, a gloss might be enough. You can get away with a lipstick if you downplay your eyes, though. Strong pinks and reds work well, but richer shades may look better than neon-bright shades.

Keep the Act Going

1. Take care of your body. Stay in shape and keep up on your basic hygiene routine so that you look your best both in and out of heartbreaker mode.
   • Monitor your weight with a balanced diet and exercise. The simplest way to do this is by keeping your calorie count in check. If you want to stay at the weight you're at, make sure that the amount of calories you consume through food equals the amount of calories you burn through exercise. To lose weight, burn more calories than you consume. To gain weight, consume more calories than you burn.
   • Bathe regularly. Showering every two days can keep your skin glowing and your hair clean and healthy.
   • Take care of your hair. If you have brittle, damaged hair, apply deep conditioners and other hair care products designed to infuse moisture back in. For limp, oily hair, look for products that regulate the balance of oil on your scalp.
   • Take care of your skin. Aside from washing up, you also need to care for your skin by applying lotion after every bath or shower. Stay out of the sun and avoid products that could stain or damage your skin.
2. Keep them wanting more. Never go too far with someone you only intend to play around with. The occasional flirtatious touch or kiss is still acceptable heartbreaker behavior, but never give the impression that you might be “easy.” On the contrary, you should make yourself seem like a challenge that never quite gives in.
   • The Marina & The Diamonds song puts it best: “Gotta be looking pure. / Kiss him goodbye at the door and leave him wanting more.”
3. Avoid personal attachments. If you really want to avoid getting “trapped” or tied down, you will need to avoid giving out special treatment or getting to know any particular person too well.
   • Once you give your heart away to someone, your heartbreaking days are over. This is not necessarily a bad thing, of course, but something to keep in mind.
4. Move on. Avoid frequenting the same spots too often to avoid running into the same crowd. As more people begin recognizing you within a given crowd, you may start to build up a reputation as a heartbreaker, and even new people may stop approaching you.

Warnings

• Know where to draw the line. A heartbreaker who flirts casually is one matter, but a heartbreaker who leads someone on for months simply to be spoiled with gifts, money, and attention is another. The former still retains some respect, while the latter is unnecessarily cruel and asking for trouble.
• Remember the saying, “you reap what you sow.” A heartbreaker look and attitude can be a good way to protect yourself and attract attention from the opposite sex, but if you go around carelessly hurting others in a deep, long-lasting way, you may find yourself alone when all is said and done.

Things You'll Need

• Attractive clothes
• Perfume
• Fashionable shoes
• Eye makeup
• Lip gloss or lipstick

Sources and Citations

See also

• Be Totally Unique and off the Wall
• Be a Mysterious Girl
• Be Weird
• Dress Indie
• Be Enigmatic
• Be Special and Mysterious
• Be a Creepy Girl
• Be a Creepy Person
• Be Strange
• Be Random

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