Deal With Teenage Depression and Nostalgia

You've now reached the awesome teen years - you're finally 13-19 years old and your parents are nicknaming you 'obnoxious'. Suddenly life seems to suck, and you keep wishing you were back in your fun, carefree kiddie past, you long to be younger. The only thing you can do is learn to deal with this depression and nostalgia for your pre teen years. Start to appreciate the great things in your life right now. Remember that your teenage years have the potential to be some of the best of your life, so don't let them slide by in a haze of depression and longing to be a child again.

Steps

  1. Think about why you are miserable now that you are in your teens and what's making you long to be back in the past. There could be many typical ( or random ) reasons why you may feel this way. Did someone bully you? It may be the whole new workload that high school is giving you, or the fact that you are you missing your old friends who have abandoned you because your aren't twelve or younger any more. Or it may simply be the major change you're experiencing as a teenager, such as the quandary of whether your should start having sex ar 16 just because you are old enough, should you start drinking alcohol, if you can at 18 or, consider leaving school. You must discover the reasons for your depression and nostalgic longing for your pre teen years. Write the reason(s) down on a list.
  2. Fill a diary with your current thoughts and feelings every week or so if you really don't know why you are depressed. Remember, it's ok to cry, or let out your feelings. When looking back upon diary entries, people are usually surprised by what they thought during the time! But having an outlet for your sadness may help cope with it.
  3. Accept your present situation. There's no point wishing that you could be in playgroup, kindergarten, primary school or any other educational establishment for the under 13s again, when you know it's impossible. Depending on where you are in your teenage years, you are legally old enough to do some responsible things, like driving, having sex, drinking alcohol, getting a job, buying a home etc. Life will always involve some work from now on, because you are on your way to being an adult, especially at 17-19.
  4. Look through the list you created. Decide upon which complaints are realistic, and which ones are unachievable. For example, if you wrote "I'm sad because I want to be 3 again so I don't have school and can watch 'The Wiggles' all day," -get over it! A whim like that is totally unachievable and will never happen again. However if you wrote "I'm sad because I wish to be 7 again, because then I had friends but now I don't.", that's actually reasonable, because something can be done about it.
  5. Ditch all those impossible whims from the list, it's a total waste of time mourning over it. Attempt to make the possible ones real. So try to make more friends, try to have more fun, play chase once in while, laugh a lot, watch funny movies, etc.
  6. Get moving! Try to make your teen years the happiest, they can be, because you only get 7 years. Have fun!
  7. If you are sad because you are away from home(for teens studying or working abroad), it can be really difficult. But read, or study, or socialize, and somehow try to make yourself forget about the situation.
  8. Find out if there is anything you can do. Why are you feeling nostalgic? If you are missing old friends, then contact them by telephone or e-mail and arrange to meet up. If you miss an old school/childhood, it may help to wander around the school once more and maybe say hello to familiar faces if it helps.
  9. Stick with people who are friendly and can help you. If you are still with some people who were with you during the times you now long for, talk it over with them. They might be feeling the same way. Talking it over certainly helps.
  10. Give your nostalgia a chance. Nostalgia is not a bad thing: it's just your mind suddenly remembering a certain period in time. When you have the time, listen to a song which makes you nostalgic to relieve yourself and to remove the pressure.

Tips

  • If you want to retain your past, then make sure you don't lose contact with your old friends or class buddies. Call them to catch up, or arrange friendship 'reunions' every 4 weeks or so.
  • A lot of teenagers experience nostalgia deep down. A lot. Just ask some of your friends (if you're close enough).
  • To be honest, most cases of nostalgia result from fallen friendships or relationships. Broken romantic relationships are understandably the most difficult to overcome. If this is your case, then obviously you're wishing it was the past, when you were having fun with your BF/GF. Sorry, the only solution here is to move on.
  • Just relax. You may be relieved to know that most teens feel depressed whenever they are doing homework. However that is no excuse to let it impede upon your grades. The teacher probably won't be satisfied with your explanation "I get depressed when I do homework, so I couldn't do it last night."
  • Playing an old playlist with songs that spark memories or watching an old television show you used to watch daily helps. You might not be able to go back, but you can recreate these fun times you're mourning over with new/old friends! Turn homework on Thursday's into a study date where you and your old buddies discuss old times over Starbucks coffee. It's okay to embrace these feelings!
  • If you have a significant other then talk to them and tell them how you feel. If you don't have a significant other than find your closest friend(s) and talk to them, don't hide your depression from your friends and loved ones, trust them.

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