Get a Child to Stop Sucking Fingers

Many babies and children suck on their fingers during the first few years of their lives. Finger sucking provides them a sense of security and happiness. It is a completely natural instinct and generally harmless for a child to suck its thumbs, but it can lead to problems with your child’s teeth or social adaptability as he or she grows.

Steps

Ending Finger Sucking

1. Ignore the problem. Because most children stop sucking their fingers between the ages of 2 and 4, you can opt to simply not do anything about it. This may prevent trauma or other problems with your child unless his or her thumb sucking is causing other issues. Weigh out which option may be best for your child by considering his or her personality and other factors such as social pressure or your personal feelings.
   • Remember that sucking fingers is a natural reflex for children and may provide more comfort than harm, especially if you try and forcibly stop your child from sucking his or her fingers.
2. Figure out your child’s triggers. Your child may be sucking his or her fingers in response to stress or anxiety or it could be a natural reflex that’s become a habit. Pay attention to your child’s behaviors before and after sucking his or her fingers to help identify specific triggers for sucking.
   • Track specific situations that cause your child to suck his or her fingers. Does the child do it when he or she has done something bad or is scared? Does your child suck his or her fingers only at night as a way to fall asleep? This can help you find the most effective strategies for eliminating triggers and breaking the sucking habit.
   • Ask your child why he or she sucks her thumb. In some cases, open communication is a good step towards dealing with the problem. Your child may also help you realize that you can provide comfort or activity in alternative ways.
3. Eliminate triggers. Once you’ve had a chance to identify any triggers that cause your child to suck his or her thumbs, you can slowly begin to get rid of them. Giving your child the comfort or activity he or she needs and/ or desires can be an important step to breaking the habit.
   • Relieve your child’s stress or anxiety that provokes sucking his or her fingers. This could be something like a fear of the dark. In this case, you may want to put a nightlight in your child’s room and give her an activity to do, like reading a book, as she falls asleep. Likewise, if your child gets scared when you go away, make a small video to remind him or her that you will be home soon.
4. Distract your child. In addition to children feeling anxiety or stress, bored children often suck their fingers. Providing your child ample activities and diversions can help distract the child from sucking on his or her fingers. Make sure your distractions are appropriate to day- or nighttime sucking habits.
   • Give your child plenty of toys with which to play during the day. Keeping your child busy is the easiest way to distract from sucking his or her fingers.
   • Have a hands-on activity or toy ready for your child if you notice him or her putting a hand or fingers toward the mouth. Inserting a toy into his or her hands will keep the fingers busy.
5. Substitute items for fingers. Offering your child a substitute activity for his or her fingers can also help break the habit. It can be something as simple as giving the child a toy or having the child try a different movement with his or her fingers.
   • Tell your child to try squeezing his or her thumb if he or she feels the need to suck the fingers.
   • Show your child how to play “hide the finger” game. For example, if your child wants to suck his or her thumb, tell him or her to “wrap your finger with another finger to hide it.”
   • Try sleep-inducing props to substitute finger sucking at night. For example, play lullabies or white noise for your child throughout the night. A teddy bear can also help reinforce other props.
6. Cover the child’s hands. If other tactics don’t work, try covering your child’s hands with bandages or a sock. The texture or even size of the covered hand can help get the child out of the habit of sucking on fingers in any situation.
   • Remember that you don’t want to embarrass your child. Consider bandaging the child’s hands only if he or she is not in school and not out in public. This may work best at home or when the child is sleeping.

Providing Positive Reinforcement

1. Talk to your child. Having a simple conversation with your child may be enough to help him or her get on the right path to stopping the habit. Stay positive and offer gentle reminders to stop sucking his or her fingers may provide enough reinforcement to curtail his or her problem.
   • Ask your child, “Do you realize that sometimes you suck your thumb?” If your child says “no,” then it’s a good sign that the habit is a natural reflex that can easily be forgotten with gentle reminders. However, you may find that your child sucks his or her fingers as a way to get your attention. In this case, ignoring your child is sometimes the best way to break the habit.
   • Spare your child any embarrassment about his or her habit. If your child starts sucking his or her fingers in public out of habit, then have a special hand signal or private cue to alert him or her to stop. You could also use a code word such as “bubbles” to let your child know to stop.
2. Encourage your child. Breaking a habit is hard for a child to do, so it’s very important to encourage your child every step of the way. Remind your child how good it will feel to be a "big girl” or a “big boy."
   • Make sure to offer reassurance often, especially if the child makes a mistake. You can say, “I know this is really hard Sara, but you’re doing a great job at not sucking your fingers.”
   • Play a game of show and tell with your child to help encourage him or her. For example, stand with your child in front of a mirror and have her look at your and his or her teeth. If your child has a small gap, you can say, “If you keep sucking your fingers, you’ll end up looking like that wascally wabbit Bugs Bunny. Do you want to have big teeth like Bugs?”
3. Praise your child. Part of encouraging your child is providing praise. Whenever your child has a milestone or does something that shows he or she is learning to not suck his or her fingers, remember to offer heaping praise. Not only does this make your child feel great, but can also reinforce the lessons you are teaching about not sucking on his or her fingers.
   • Tell your child, “I haven’t seen you suck your thumbs at all today. Wait to go! Why don’t we put a sticker on the calendar?” Likewise, you could say, “Christopher, I noticed that you started to put your fingers in your mouth and then stopped and got a book. That was awesome and I am so proud of you!”
   • Offer verbal and other forms of praise. For example, put stickers on a calendar towards a reward or other goal. You could also make a sign for your child that says, “Way to go, Sam!” and decorate it with stars and other designs.
4. Reward your child. If your child is meeting goals or has stopped sucking his or her fingers, reward him or her! You don’t have to do anything elaborate, just a small gesture such as an extra bedtime story, a trip to the park, or a small toy can help show your child you are proud of his or her accomplishment. In addition, it will help reinforce the lessons you are teaching your child about not sucking his or her fingers.

Avoiding Negative Experiences

1. Stay away from unpleasant techniques. In some cases, friends and acquaintances or some doctors may recommend covering your child’s nail with a bitter substance such as vinegar or a harmless polish. Be aware that these may backfire and cause your child significant stress and anxiety, which can lead to further finger sucking.
   • Be aware that polishes or varnishes formulated to discourage finger sucking are not harmful to your child. They simply taste bad. However, you may still not want to use this tactic unless a doctor recommends it.
2. Resist giving negative feedback. Whatever you do, never scold, ridicule, or criticize your child’s finger sucking habit. This can cause your child significant trauma and may cause him or her to more fervently continue the habit. Use only positive words and remove yourself from a situation if you feel you cannot control your reaction to your child.
   • Remind yourself that your child is a child. You might also want to remind yourself how hard it is for you to break bad habits and that is can be especially difficult for a child.
3. Keep developmental stages in mind. Many children will stop sucking their fingers as toddlers. This may happen between the ages of 2 and 4, but could happen later as a result of peer pressure from school. Thumb sucking generally only becomes a problem for you if it either is a social issue for your child or his or her permanent teeth have started to develop. Reminding yourself that thumb sucking is a normal part of a childhood that eventually disappears may help you and your child avoid a traumatic experience.
   • Ask yourself if your child’s thumb sucking is harming him or her—or more you. This may help you figure out if this is the right time to break your child’s habit. Be aware that the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends treatment only for children who suck their fingers after the age of 5.
4. See the dentist. If you are very worried about your child’s finger sucking habit and nothing is working to stop it, schedule an appointment with the dentist. Often a dentist can give you tips or tricks that may get your child to stop sucking his or her fingers. Even letting your dentist talk to your child may be enough to curtail the habit.
   • Inform your dentist’s office why you are coming for the visit. Make sure to let the dentist know your concerns in private where your child cannot hear you, which may cause her trauma. Ask your dentist what he or she thinks is the best way to get your child to stop sucking his or her fingers.

Tips

• Keep trying with your child until he or she stops the habit. Remember that your child is just that—a child—and is apt to make mistakes and have setbacks.

Related Articles

• Stop Sucking Your Thumb (Older Kids)
• Care for Vomiting in Kids
• Stop Your Throat from Hurting

Sources and Citations

See also

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• Help Your Toddler Make Friends
• Stay Calm During Toddler Temper Tantrums
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• Keep Your Toddler Safe in a Swing
• Entertain a One Year Old
• Babysit a Toddler
• Cut a Toddler's Hair
• Help a Toddler Adjust to Preschool
• Travel by Plane with an Infant or Toddler

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