Get an Older Guy to Like You

Do you want to attract the attention of an older guy? It can be intimidating to talk to a member of the opposite sex, especially if he is older than you. Whether you know your crush already or not, if he is 1-3 years older than you, this article will give you the tips you need to spark his interest.

Steps

Acting Appropriately

1. Make sure it is safe and legal. The age of consent varies from state to state, so know what the legal age is where you live. If you are under the age of consent, do not try to date someone who is over the age, as that can create difficulties in setting boundaries and could potentially have criminal implications.
2. Put your comfort level first, not his. Older guys will have more experiences and freedoms than younger girls. They might drive a car, have less parental supervision, or have already had sexual relationships. Know ahead of time what you’re comfortable with and stay true to that instead of worrying about what he wants.
   • Be confident about telling him what you are and aren’t okay with. It’s better to know that your expectations are different are early on rather than staying quiet and finding yourself in a compromising situation. Speaking your mind and establishing boundaries are signs of maturity that will make him respect you more.
   • You don’t have to wear skimpy clothing to get his attention. If you’re comfortable, wear clothes that flatter your figure and make you feel confident, but aren’t overly sexy or revealing. You want the guy to be interested in who you are, not just your body. Leave room for mystery.
3. Be yourself and be mature. While some guys may like girls who seem younger, others prefer girls who act more mature for their age. Being mature doesn’t mean being dry, serious, or boring— you don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not. Typically, behaving maturely means being confident, comfortable, and cool. Girls mature faster than boys, so you may already be on the same maturity level as the guy you have your eye on.
   • Avoid being clingy and following him around everywhere. Doing this might make you seem like more of a little sister than a romantic interest.
   • Do not act needy, as this is a sign of low self-esteem. Neediness is unattractive because it demands constant attention, reassurance, and affirmation from another person which can be annoying. Wanting to be with somebody is very different from needing to be with somebody.
   • Don’t brag about how “experienced” you are. Trying to seem mature in this way actually has the opposite effect.
   • Being confident in who you are is mature and extremely attractive.

Engaging Him

1. Talk to him. Go right up to him and introduce yourself if he doesn’t know who you are yet. Say: “Hi, I’m (your name),” then “And you are?” or “Who are you?” if you want to be a bit more playful and brazen. Repeat his name to help you remember it and let him know you are attentive: “Hey, Ryan, it’s really nice to meet you,” or “Oh, Sergio, I love that name!” You go to the same school so you have plenty in common to keep it from being awkward. You can break the ice by referencing how you’ve noticed him: “I see you walk past my gym class every day and I wanted to put a name to the face!” Start talking to him on Facebook or other social media.
2. Find casual ways to be around him. If you have the same lunch period, talk to him in line or, if you already know each other, sit at his table. If you have a class together, sit near him so you can talk easily or ask him a question about the subject. Get to know his friends so there might be an opportunity to hang out outside of school.
3. Get to know him. Ask him questions and listen. If you don’t know each other very well yet, keep it simple with questions like “How was your day?” or “What do you like to do on the weekends?” Find out if he plays a sport, what kind of music he likes, what he likes to do in his free time. You don’t have to interview him or blast him with questions, but make sure you’re not just talking about yourself, which is easy to do. Find ways to show him that you remember what he’s told you. Wish him luck on his game or ask him if he’s listened to his favorite band’s new album. Don’t pry into personal details like his religion or family dynamic too soon, keep it light and playful. Find out what you have in common and let the conversation develop naturally.
   • If you’re struggling to start a conversation, try making a comment that ends in a question. “I saw the basketball team got new uniforms, do you like them?” or “It looks like it’s gonna rain, doesn’t it?”

Flirting

1. Flirt smart, not hard. Keep your flirting playful and fun, not forceful and you’ll make him feel comfortable and want to be around you.
2. Flirt with your eyes. If he’s across the room, make eye contact with him. Don’t stare, but glance up occasionally and catch his eye. For an extra sexy gaze, look up, down, then up again through your lashes. Make eye contact when you’re talking to him, but not so much that it feels like you’re staring him down.
3. Smile. You don’t need to grin ear-to-ear; giving a warm, genuine smile will make you seem approachable and friendly. Smile with your eyes so that your whole face lights up.
4. Compliment him. We all love a bit of flattery, but make sure that it’s objective so that you don’t seem too eager or obsessive. An objective compliment is one that states the facts rather than your opinion, which is subjective.
   • Subjective: “I really love your dimples.” “I think you have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen.” Complimenting in this fashion gives away the fact that he’s already won you over and doesn’t have to work for your attention.
   • Objective: “You played great in the game last night” (if he actually did play well). “ You have great eyes.” This type of compliment is based on observation and lets your crush know that you notice them, but will make him wonder how interested you are. Not coming on too strong will keep him wanting more.
5. Give him a nickname. If you already know each other call him by a name that’s cute yet masculine and will be personal between the two of you.
6. Laugh at his jokes, but only if they’re good. You want to boost his confidence, but not come off as fake by laughing at a joke that’s obviously lame.
7. Make physical contact. Touching a person is a way to indicate that you’re comfortable with him. If you’re laughing at one of his jokes, briefly put your hand on his arm. Make your contact casual and seem almost accidental. Walk next to him a little too closely. Give him a gentle, playful nudge when you pass him in the hall. A light smack on the arm can be silly and fun, but don’t push or punch him, even if you’re just joking around. Hurting him is not flirtatious. The point is to be attentive, not aggressive.
8. Call him by his name. It’s said that the sweetest sound is the sound of one’s own name. Using his name when you talk to him creates intimacy. “I like your new shoes, Adam.”

Tips

• If your crush isn’t into younger girls, don’t force it; that’s more about him than it is about you.
• Always be true to yourself and don’t change who you are for a guy.

Related Articles

• Date an Older Guy
• Attract Your Crush
• Be a Physically Attractive Woman
• Flirt Without Being Provocative
• Flirt with a Guy
• Get a Boyfriend

Sources and Citations

See also

• Look Attractive (Guys)
• Ask a Girl to Hang Out
• Get a Guy Who Has a Girlfriend
• Attract Girls Without Being Annoying
• Appear More Beautiful to Men
• Date If You're Over 65 Years Old
• Attract a Guy
• Get Him to Make a Move
• Know if You Like a Guy
• Get a Boyfriend

Read more ...