Handle Being the New Kid at School
Did your Mom and Dad come out with the "Big News"? Did your family move and you have to go to a new school? Here are some ways to help you survive your first day as the "new kid".
Contents
Steps
- Be confident. Walk with your head held high and don't slouch. If you look confident, everyone will think you're confident. That's why first impressions are so important. Just remember not to be overly confident, you don't want to come across as rude or self absorbed.
- Get used to the school. This way you'll know where everything is. You also won't be embarrassed because you do not know where anything is.
- Pack a cold lunch on the first day. This way you will be able to get to the lunch room early and won't have to face the embarrassment of having nowhere to sit.
- Join in some after school activities. That way you will meet some friends that have the same interests as you. They may not go to the same school, but they're still friends, right?
- Introduce yourself to your new teachers. They will be glad that you can speak for yourself and will respect you for that. It may be hard for you but you do not have to do it in the middle of class!
- Try to look your best the first day of school. Wear your best outfit (not fancy), and do your hair nice and neat. Something like a plain shirt and jeans is fine. Remember, first impressions are important.
- Be confident. This is another first impression thing. People will respect you for being confident.
- Be honest. If they asked you where you lived, don't lie, tell them the truth. Don't tell them you live at that White House.
- Talk with the person who sits next to you. You'll make a friend you sit next to every day.
- Smile. Smiling is one of the quickest ways of making people like you. It makes you seem more friendly.
- Remember that the new place will give you a new chance. For at least the first day, you’re exotic. Especially in a school where there isn’t much coming and going, you’re someone special. Yes, it’s true you left what is familiar. But the new place is also a new opportunity. Nobody knows who you are, who you hung out with, or what to expect from you. If you didn’t quite like who you are or the reputation you had, you have a chance to start over. If you did like it, you can take that confidence with you and make a big splash.
- Get oriented. If at all possible, visit the school before school starts. It’s hard enough to start over without also getting lost all the time. Ask your folks to arrange a tour. Figure out where the principal’s office is and how to get to the library. Ask for a map of the layout of the school. No time for this? Well, asking for directions is one way to begin to get to know people.
- Do a little research. Get on the Internet and find out about the school. There’s probably a website. If there isn’t one for the school, look for the town’s site. You can find out about sports teams and events. You can learn what clubs are active and how the teams are doing. You can even check out what is usually served for lunch.
- Take the time to assess. When you’re lonely, it’s tempting to grab onto whoever grabs you. But you want to take the time to look things over and figure out who’s who. As you know, as soon as you start hanging with a particular group, it will be hard to change your mind.
- Dress for the group you want to join. For most teens, clothes are code for who you are. Wear a clean, neat, but kind of neutral outfit the first day. Get up in time to shower and do your hair. Jeans are generally fine as long as they’re clean and not flashy. Presenting yourself neutrally the first few days gives you time to figure out the informal rules for dress among the students. Once you’ve got it down, you can dress to fit in with the group you want to accept you.
- Avoid cafeteria stress the first day. Pack a lunch so you don’t have to stand in line wondering whether to accept someone’s invitation to join their table or, worse, to have to walk the long mile in front of everyone to an empty table. Confidently sit on the edge and watch for a few days. Sit in a way that broadcasts confidence. You’re not a reject. You’re taking the time to think about who you’ll choose to be with.
- Introduce yourself to teachers. First impressions do matter and you want to make a good one. Try to get to classes a bit early or to stay a few minutes after class to introduce yourself and to tell them where you’re from. A few minutes of politeness will get things off on the right foot.
- Join something. A fast way to get to know some people is to join a team, a club, the band, a service organization, or student activities. People who share the same interests are likely your kind of people. Even if you don’t make real friends at first, you’ll learn some people’s names and you’ll have a few people to say hi to in the halls.
- Take charge. Once you’ve got an idea who you want to meet, it’s up to you. Take a deep breath, pull up your big boy or big girl pants and start introducing yourself. Set a goal of meeting at least one new person a day. Say hello to the person who sits next to you in English class. Strike up a conversation with the person who has the locker next to yours. Remember – people like to talk about themselves. Think of a couple of questions you can ask each person and the conversation will take off almost by itself.
- Keep but don’t retreat to old friends. Skype, Facebook, Twitter, texting, email and even the phone can let you stay in touch with old friends. That’s all good. But it can also be quicksand. If you let yourself spend hours and hours communicating with old friends, you’ll make it less likely that you’ll find new ones. By staying so connected to people who live hours away, you might keep yourself lonely in your own backyard.
Tips
- Being popular does not mean you have to be mean. Be friendly and kind to everyone, even the ones that may seem odd. You want people to think of you as kind, not a snooty and picky person.
- If you want to be popular at your new school, make friends with everybody. Being popular means being well liked by lots of people. You do not have to be friends with someone you don't like, but try to be friendly.
- Try to find the other new kids, if they're as lost as you are they'll probably be glad to find someone whose having the same problems
- Keep your head high to show your confidence. Smile when you meet new people, so that you seem friendly and easy to approach.
- Keep in mind who you are and who you want to be. It's easy to lose sight of long term goals in the moment but remember what you're at school for. Making friends is important for social wellbeing but too much of anything is unhealthy. Don't skip studying because of hanging too much with friends.
- Be mindful that the first day is awkward for everyone, not just the new kid. So don't go in with expectations that everyone's got it down but you. You'll be fine if you're confident and kind to everyone you run into.
- Remember: first impressions are important, you don't get a second one!
- Try to talk to everyone in your class; it's the best way to make friends.
- Always have a pack of gum on you. If you don't know anyone, pull out your gum. People will be sure to see it and want a piece, and you can try striking up a conversation.
Warnings
- Don't lie, or say stuff about your self that isn't true. You'll just keep doing it, and it will be very obvious that it's not true.
- Don't change your personality too much to "fit in" or people will think that you are desperate to be in the next new group, or just annoying.
- Don't get carried away with trying to fit in and forget why you're at school
- Do not be afraid to make friends with the teachers just because you think other students will think that you are a suck-up, a know-it-all, desperate, or even all three. Make friends with people who you are sure won't make fun of you for befriending the teacher. If anyone makes fun of you for being friends with the teacher, just ignore them.
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