Live and Deal with Indian Parents
Sometimes, Indian parents seem to be harder to deal with than the rest. Stereotypically they have high academic expectations, limited dating rules, and cultural differences. Many Indian teens growing up in the western world often feel overwhelmed. This article will give Indian kids some advice for living in an Indian family and dealing with common scenarios. This article will also highlight the upsides of living in an Indian family.
Steps
- Remember that there are and will always continue to be some cultural differences among your Indian parents and you which are irreversible. You should try to learn to live with them rather than change them. Learning more about their upbringing may help you.
- The pressure to do well at school. Stereotypically Indian parents expect you to do extremely well at school. Striving for the highest grades you can achieve is not a bad thing and remember Indians in America often get the highest paying jobs.
- Apart from the expectation of maintaining high academic grades, your parents will probably expect you to do homework, or "studies" at home.
- Your parents may not approve of you dating. In order to fit in with your peers, you can talk to girls or guys (depending on your gender) at school, but avoid activities like bringing your opposite sex friend home as your parents will certainly not see it in the way you see it. Do not get into any arguments over this matter with them, especially if your parents are very orthodox and strict. You will have to deal with a lot more trouble, mentally and in some cases even physically. Try to stay low in the dating world as a teen and deal with your relationship issues as you get older with your parents.
- One thing to remember though is that this can be a big matter of disagreement between you and your parents, remember that the average Indian will never divorce, and most Indian marriages last for a long time. You don't want to be tied down to a marriage that you don't want to be in.
- Try to avoid getting into too much trouble at school as your parents will dish out more severe punishments than your school district ever could. However, always remember that if you are involved in a justified fight, your parents will support you all the way, encourage your actions, and even conduct an Indian version of Face time with that horrible child.
- Remember, Indian parents always have a natural tendency to be cheap. They will buy you some George jeans from Walmart even though you might have your eye on some of those swaggy jeans at West 49. Most Indian parents will, in time, start buying you better clothes or other products when you prove to them that everyone uses them, especially if one of them is a fellow Indian.
- If your parents never let you go to the mall on your own or with friends, go with them and distract them with a discount at a nice store. There is an 80% guarantee that they will be so occupied with those good value for paisa clothes or furniture that you can ask them for permission to browse another store and they will just say yes without thinking.
- If your parents yell at you, never argue with them. Just keep nodding and apologizing and they will eventually cool down.
- If they have relatives or guests over, try being polite and answering their questions and ask about their family. After a reasonable time you can always use school work to excused .
- Try to keep your image and reputation in school good. You don't have to be a hardcore "swag" god but do not be the nerd. Hangout with everyone. Be popular. If your classmates make some Indian jokes laugh along. However, if they are making hardcore insults about India or your culture, show them the classic Indian talent of a good beating. Do not be worried about getting in trouble at home as your parents will strongly condone your actions given the circumstances.
- Save up for your own things. If you are 16 and you want a car, get one when you get your own job because there is a small chance they will see eye to eye with you on that. Remember, back in the 1970s and '80s in India, cars, TVs, phones, microwaves, washing machines, and even western style sitting toilets were only for the extremely wealthy.
Tips
- Behave well; other adults will notice your behaviour and report back to your parents. If the report is good, you will be congratulated by your parents.
- Before comparing your parents with your friends parents, remember that their upbringing was much more difficult. While Bob's parents were living in good old America or Canada, your parents lived in a poverty stricken India where they got to see kids starving in the streets. While Bob's parents were playing around with telephones, your parents only thought them as distant dreams. While Bob's parents had the option of a decent life whether they got a good job or not, your parents either had the option of becoming a professional or scraping by on less than $2.00 a day.
- Appreciate some of your Indian culture and heritage.
- Try to help your parents around the house.
- Be chill and proud that your parents are trying to make you successful in the future
- Make friends with other Indians. Most of them are not the ideal betas or betis they seem. You can even share some of your own tips and tricks with each other.
- Ask them about India, its current affairs, and their childhoods.
- Remember, at the end of the day, you are who you are and you must live your own life. Be true to yourself. If you feel opposed to something that your parents say or do (or make you do), fight for what you think is right.
- If we fight for what we think is right there is a chance that they end up thinking they are being disrespected.
Warnings
- Don't talk about anything which has to do with the word "sex"
- Not all Indian parents are the same. some of them are very liberal and westernized while others are very conservative. This article is more descriptive of the conservative parent.
- A quick way to be disowned is to talk crap about India or their parents and relatives
- Any physical punishment is abuse and you shouldn't tolerate it.
- Set that line between your home life and your social life and enforce it.
- Although it may be hard, try not to talk back to your parents or disrespect them because it will worsen the situation and make them even more upset with you.
