Survive Through School with a Horrible Teacher

If you are faced with a horrible teacher, you need to do more than just survive. You need to protect yourself while still getting your education – and maybe, if you’re lucky, learn a bit about how to handle difficult relationships. Perhaps this teacher just has a difficult style or personality, or maybe she’s ready to retire. In other cases, a teacher might cross the boundary into being inappropriate or even abusive. Getting help will make things better.

Steps

Interacting with a Difficult Teacher

  1. Be clear in your own mind about why you think your teacher is horrible. Once you have a bad impression of a teacher, it’s easy to start hating everything about them. Which aspects of your teacher’s behavior are really impeding your learning? What things are just mildly annoying? Identifying the core problems is the first step to developing a plan to deal with them.[1]
    • For example, you might have a teacher who makes corny jokes and also isn’t clear about what the homework assignment is. You might be able to ignore the jokes, but you could ask your teacher if he could post the homework assignment on the board before the end of class.
    • A very strict teacher might be annoying, especially if you learn better in a more relaxed environment. But if your teacher deliberately frightens or humiliates students, you may need to talk to a parent or other adult in the school about the situation.
  2. Evaluate your own behavior. What are you doing to contribute to the bad relationship between you and this teacher? You need to hold yourself accountable for your own behavior. Even if a teacher is boring, for example, you don’t have any excuse to nap during class.
    • If you realize that you are contributing to a bad situation, change your behavior – and apologize for it. For example, you might say: “I’m sorry that I didn’t pay attention in class yesterday. I know math is important, and I want to do better.” Don’t turn your apology into an opportunity to criticize: don’t say, for example, “I’m sorry I fell asleep – it’s just that you’re so boring.”
  3. Talk to your teacher. Ask him, sincerely and respectfully, how you can do better in the class. Listen to his advice as well as any criticism they offer of you. Don’t respond defensively. Instead, try to reflect back what you hear in order to be sure you are understanding correctly.
    • Teachers often appreciate students who take initiative. Rather than asking, “How can I get a good grade?” try approaching a difficult teacher with a specific plan and ask for feedback. For instance, you could say: “I’m planning to study for this exam by re-reading the assigned chapters and making flashcards with the vocabulary. Does that sound like a good plan to you? Would you suggest anything else?”
  4. Reward and encourage good teaching. Just as your teachers try to encourage you, you can encourage your teacher to provide interesting, relevant lectures and assignments. This is a long-term approach, but it can pay dividends in your learning as well as in making the class more bearable.[2] But always be sincere: faking enthusiasm will only make the relationship worse.
    • Ask questions that show that you’re doing the reading and engaging with the material. Burnt-out teachers may become more engaged and lively if they see that their students are genuinely interested.
    • Don’t only talk to your teacher to ask for extensions on deadlines or other favors.
    • Thank her for a particularly clear explanation or an assignment that really helped you to learn.
  5. Focus on your own success, not the teacher. It’s easy to get caught up in passing judgment and developing theories about people you don’t like. But difficult people usually have some hidden reasons for their unreasonable behavior.[3] Remember that you don’t need to be friends with your teacher. Keep your focus on how to succeed as well as possible in the class.

Involving Parents with a Difficult Teacher

  1. Identify whether the issues are worth involving a parent. If your teacher’s behavior frightens you or makes it hard for you to learn, consider getting a parent involved. Examples of behavior that might warrant parental intervention:
    • Yelling frequently, belittling students, or deliberately humiliating students.
    • Being very disorganized. This might include losing assignments or failing to enter grades.
    • If the teacher can’t teach in a way that allows you to learn.
    • Handing out work without teaching material.
  2. Discuss the issues with your parent. Come prepared with specific examples. Rather than saying, “My teacher is scary,” for example, say: “Last Thursday, my teacher got so mad he hit all of our desks with a ruler and shouted at us for ten minutes. I was really scared.”
  3. Ask your parent to contact your teacher. It might be a good idea for your parent to e-mail or write to your teacher. That way, she has documentation of their interactions in case she needs to go to the principal or other authority later on. The e-mail can include a request for an in-person or telephone conversation, and it should include a telephone number.
    • Read the e-mail over before your parent sends it, if possible, to make sure that your parent has understood the issues.
  4. Follow up by phone if you don’t get a reply. Your parent should note when he made the call.
  5. Know when to ask your parent to contact the principal or other authority. If the teacher doesn’t respond, the issues are not resolved, or the situation worsens, it’s time to talk to someone above the teacher.

Getting Help if You Have an Abusive Teacher

  1. Recognize inappropriate or abusive behavior. In many places, teachers are never allowed to reprimand their students physically. Teachers should never approach their students romantically or sexually, or make sexually charged comments or jokes.[4] Humiliating or bullying students is not ok.
    • For example, teachers should not make comments such as, “If you were older, I would date you,” or other remarks that seem to suggest or invite a romantic relationship. Sometimes these comments can seem flattering. However, they are an abuse of the teacher-student relationship.
    • Teachers should not single students out for humiliation or invite other students to mock them. Reprimanding students in this fashion is inappropriate, bullying behavior.
    • While it’s normal for a teacher to impose reasonable consequences or speak sternly to a student, she should not scream, subject a student to a lengthy tirade, or threaten a student with disproportionate punishments.[5]
  2. Pay attention to your own reactions. It’s normal to dread a class taught by a bad teacher, but fear or sadness about entering a classroom may be a signal that something more serious is going on.[6] Notice if your feelings about the class are impacting the rest of your life or preventing you from enjoying your normal activities. It’s one thing not to love math class; it’s another to have your whole week overshadowed by it.
  3. Take notes and document inappropriate behavior. Note down the date and, if possible, exact words or actions, or record it with your phone. This kind of information will be more helpful than general statements such as, “She always picks on one kid,” or “He often talks about girls and dating in a weird way.” Notice what other students or teachers witnessed the incident.[6]
  4. Take it up with your parents and the higher authorities. Inappropriate or abusive behavior needs to be reported. Start by discussing it with your parents. You may ask them to meet with the principal, head-teacher, department head, or other appropriate authority. Be prepared to submit your concerns in writing. If these conversations don’t have an effect, talk to those higher up: the superintendent, the school board, or the local education authority, for example. [7]
    • Physical or sexual abuse should be reported to the police if you feel safe doing so. You can also seek out a therapist or counselor and disclose what’s happening. If you don’t feel able to speak to anyone, call a hotline that specializes in child abuse.[8]
  5. Request to be switched out of the class. While the school authorities deal with this teacher, you should not have to be her class. Ask to be switched into another class, if possible, or allowed to drop the course and re-take it with another instructor.

Taking Responsibility for Your Own Learning

  1. Don’t avoid doing work in a class just because you don’t like the teacher. Try to do all the assigned work and keep up with the material anyway. Sometimes, you may find that you like a very demanding teacher better once you start to get a grasp on the subject.
  2. Set your own goals. If a teacher is not really teaching a class, you might have to set your own learning goals and work to achieve them. Use external sources of information to gauge what you should be learning in this class. Setting realistic personal goals is a crucial part of self-directed learning.
    • For example, if you are in a class that is supposed to be preparing you for a set exam, find published older versions of that exam in your library. Work your way through one of them and identify what you still need to learn.
    • Make use of your textbook. Most textbooks have sample questions and answers at the ends of chapters. Set a goal of being able to answer 80% of the relevant questions correctly.
  3. Rely on other teachers where possible. Take full advantage of other resources, such as designated tutoring times led by other teachers, to learn the subject taught by the horrible teacher. Just because you can’t learn a topic from this teacher doesn’t mean you should learn it at all!
    • For example, if your foreign language teacher is horrible, you might ask another teacher in the language department for advice on learning and practicing that language. Don’t criticize your teacher, but just ask for resources to help you learn outside the classroom.
  4. Form a study group with other students in your class.[9] Studying with friends can offer the moral support you need to survive the horrible teacher. In addition, you may understand a particular concept better if you hear someone else explain it.
    • Take turns teaching one another the key concepts each week. Use a white board or chart paper to sketch out and demonstrate ideas.
    • Quiz one another using flashcards to help retain information.
  5. Find out if you have a learning disability. If your difficulties aren’t limited to just one teacher, you might benefit from evaluation for a learning disability. Do you find it difficult in general to read, or to remember, or to follow directions or stay organized?[10] Common learning disabilities include dyslexia, which affects your ability to read and process language, and dysgraphia, which affects your ability to write. Getting appropriate accommodations and support will help you succeed in all of your classes.[11]
    • Talk to a trusted teacher or guidance counselor about your concerns. Your school may also have a dedicated Accessibility or Accommodations office which will be able to help you access evaluation and support.

Sources and Citations

  1. ↑ http://www.usnews.com/education/blogs/the-college-experience/2012/02/01/4-ways-to-deal-with-a-bad-college-professor
  2. ↑ http://www.popecenter.org/commentaries/article.html?id=2797
  3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/living-the-questions/201503/20-expert-tactics-dealing-difficult-people
  4. ↑ http://www.doe.virginia.gov/support/prevention/child_abuse/sexual_misconduct_warning_signs_shakeshaft.pdf
  5. ↑ http://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/teachers-who-bully
  6. ↑ 6.0 6.1 http://www.parenting.com/article/5-smart-ways-to-handle-teacher-troubles
  7. ↑ https://www.gov.uk/report-teacher-misconduct
  8. ↑ https://www.childhelp.org/hotline/
  9. ↑ http://www.d.umn.edu/kmc/student/loon/acad/strat/grpstudy1.html
  10. ↑ https://www.nichd.nih.gov/health/topics/learning/conditioninfo/Pages/symptoms.aspx
  11. ↑ http://ldaamerica.org/advocacy/lda-position-papers/right-to-an-evaluation-of-a-child-for-special-education-services/
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