Avoid Getting Caught Smoking by Your Parents

We all know that our parents catching us smoking can be a real pain, even if they do have our best interest at heart. If you smoke getting caught by your parents is the least of your worries. The best advice is to just not do it. You shouldn't smoke in the first place. But failing that, here are a few tips on how to keep you from getting caught for all you newbies out there.

Steps

Never Smoke in the House

  1. Never smoke in the house. This should be the most obvious rule! If your parents smoke, however, it is easier to get away with it. But if you smoke a cigarette in a non-smoking house, it will take days and lots of air freshener to get rid of the smell. Just don't do it!
    • However, if your house has a patio, you can go outside and smoke when your parents are not around. (Make sure any ash in the area is cleaned up if no one else in the family smokes.) If you have to, light a citronella candle to help mask the odor. Otherwise, avoid smoking anywhere near the house. The wood and brick will absorb the odor. BTW: while you are at it, try to not to get caught by your nosey neighbors.
  2. People often make the mistake of hiding cigarettes in their bedrooms when they're out. Don't do it. Use common sense. The best thing to do is to have them on you (inside a pocket or something) all of the time. Do this with your matches as well.
    • If you are going to school and you still have your cigarettes with you, it is a good idea to hide them in your waistband so if you get searched, most schools are not allowed to look in that general area.
  3. If you do smoke in the house, make sure to dispose of your paraphernalia. Don't be careless. Get rid of empty packs of smokes and matches. Get rid of ashes by washing them down the sink.

Be Careful Where You Smoke

  1. Never smoke anywhere your parents or their friends might look for you. If this isn't possible, try to wear clothes that will help hide your identity, like a hoodie, a pair of sunglasses, and a baseball cap.
  2. If you smoke in school, go to a place where no one else will go like an old bathroom or storage room. Blow the smoke into a ventilation source such as an air vent.
  3. Smoke with your friends. It's helpful if one of your friends is allowed to smoke. In this way, if your parents catch you with a cigarette in your hand, you can simply say you were holding it for your friend. Don't expect all parents to fall for this, however. They probably tried the same excuse when they were teenagers.

Be Aware of Second-hand Smoke

  1. One thing that you can do that is really helpful is to take a paper towel roll or a toilet paper roll and tape a dryer sheet to one end. Exhale into the open end of the roll. The dryer sheet will help disperse the smoke and mask the smell.
  2. Keep an air-freshener/fabric spray hidden somewhere around the house. Spray a cloud into the air and walk through it. This will help cover up odor on your clothes, hair and skin.
  3. Avoid your parents until you can change your clothes. Carry some extra clothes if you can. The most important clothes to change are your shirt and hat (if you are wearing one). Have a friend keep it or hide it in the garage.
  4. Remove (or unzip) your jacket when you're smoking. After you're done, put the jacket back on. Or better yet, reserve a ratty old jacket to wear while smoking. Make sure your parents do not know about this garment.
  5. Take a bath or a shower. Cologne/perfume will not mask the scent of a cigarette. Bathing is the better option because it gets rid of the smell instead of covering it. Make sure to shampoo your hair. Smoke has a habit of getting tangled up in your hair.
    • If you cannot wash your hair before you see your parents, running a scented dryer sheet across your head (as well as any clothing) will cover up the smell with the scent of clean laundry.
    • Many people pull back their hair and wear a hat while smoking. This helps keep your hair away from your cigarette's smoke.
  6. If you're smoking outside, wear gloves if the weather is a little chilly. Smoke will stay on your hands for hours after smoking and gloves will help cover it up. Leather gloves work best; little cotton ones provide no odor protection whatsoever. Also: smoking cigarettes will discolor your fingers. Wearing gloves will definitely prevent this.
    • If you don't wear gloves, try rubbing your hands with one (and only one) leaf from a tree or a bush. By doing so, the oils from the leaf will cover the smell of smoke. Some leaves will give suspicious smells, so try different varieties until you find the right one.
    • If nothing else, Wash your hands as soon as you get home. And use an extremely strongly scented soap. You may want to keep anti-bacterial hand sanitizer stashed outside of your house, in a flower pot, in the garage or hidden in your backpack. The smellier and more fragrant the better. Blueberry, blackberry and citrus fruit smells cover smoke well. Lotion always works too.
  7. When driving in a car, make sure all the windows are down. This way the smoke won't be trapped inside the car. The rushing air will help keep your car and your clothes a little bit fresh.

Keep Your Breath Fresh

  1. Brush your teeth. You need to get the cigarette taste out of your mouth. Brushing your teeth and tongue is the best thing to do. Use a mouthwash too.
  2. Cover up your breath. After you're done smoking, eat something that will cover up your cigarette breath. Doritos and mints work best. If possible, it is best to brush your teeth.
  3. Drink a soda or other beverage while you smoke. A dry mouth tends to hold much more odor.
  4. Chew some strongly flavoured gum or drink something like Ice Coffee to get rid of smoky breath. Drinking a beer and coke also helps.
  5. Smoke remains in your breath and stains your teeth. Make sure to have good quality mints or gum to help mask the smell. If you have time, brush your teeth and tongue; the residual odor will be reduced.

Tips

  • People who smoke are less likely to smell the smoke on you, so if your parent doesn't smoke be extra careful to get rid of the smell.
  • Try avoiding smoking for 1 hour before returning home. Even the best gum will not mask the smell of a recently smoked cigarette.
  • Decide whether to use a lighter or matches. Matches are cheaper and are easier to get rid of when the heat is on but lighters are cheaper in the long run, don't make any noise in your pocket, and are generally smaller (and "cooler").
  • Smoking in the wind is an extremely useful way of not smelling like cigarettes. Find a place that is usually windy. Steep hills almost always have a breeze on them. You can avoid most tobacco smells (except for your hands) if you smoke while you ride your bike and by turning your head sideways when you smoke.
  • If you're a girl, make a small hole in your handbag/school bag in the lining and pop the packet in there. Make sure the hole isn't visible when you open the bag. This trick works best in a black bag with black lining.
  • Peel and eat oranges - the citrus helps mask the smell on your breath, and peeling the oranges (especially smaller juicier ones like satsumas or tangerines) will get the smell off of your fingers.
  • Try smoking with a friend who got caught once.It may seem weird but he's going to teach you from his mistake!
  • Blow Pops or Tootsie Pops are good ways to mask cigarette breath. Keep a stash handy and just have one right after you're done.
  • A good way to mask cigarette smell on your breath is peanut butter or soy sauce.
  • If you smoke in your room, get some incense, and light it whenever you smoke, however, keep in mind that sometimes not even incense helps if you are a heavy smoker.
  • It might just be smart to get yourself a jacket and pair of gloves exclusively for smoking. Make sure that your parents don't know about these.
  • Use orange extract, it is very strong and you can pat it around your check. (FYI: use only a little bit.)
  • If smoking at your house or a friend's to ease the smell off easily, insert your clothes (shirt) in a dry-cleaner.
  • If you have a pool near the house you can always take a dip. Try swimming underwater for 20 minutes and most of the smoke will be gone.
  • If you're smoking outside in your garden, burn a candle in the room you come straight back in to, it will magic away the smell. Avoid using air fresheners or incense sticks, they're too suspicious.
  • Baking soda can really help mask the smell of cigarette smoke.
  • Wearing a hooded sweatshirt while smoking can keep the smell out of your hair and off of your shirt.
  • The most suspicious thing a young smoker can do is to "go out for a few minutes", especially if you are not doing an activity other than smoking.
  • Avoid smoking for at least 30 minutes to an hour before you see your parents.

Warnings

  • Do not smoke near any adults who know who you are.
  • Your parents might get suspicious after a while so always make sure they aren't following you before you light up.
  • If your parents discover that you are smoking, you will run the risk of losing some privileges. For instance, you could lose your cell phone, your computer privileges, or even the use of the family car. You could be grounded and even prohibited from hanging out with your best friends (especially if your parents think they got you smoking in the first place.)
  • Never smoke where there are any fumes of any kind. If you are not sure just don't light up.
  • Do not smoke if you are under the legal age for your country. If caught by authorities you will face at least a fine and a possible arrest or probation.

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