Be Creative when Telling Your Husband He's Going to Be a Dad

Becoming parents is one of the most exciting times in the life of any couple. If you discover you’re pregnant, the first person you likely want to tell is your husband or life partner. But you may want to find a special or clever way to break the happy news. With some simple planning and preparation, you can tell your husband that he’s going to be a dad and have a special memory to cherish in coming years.

Steps

Breaking the News

1. Give your husband the positive pregnancy test. There are many different ways to give your husband the positive pregnancy test and surprise him. From taking a picture to switching out the test for other items, your husband may not be expecting what he receives.
   • Take a picture of the test and upload it to your computer. Set it as the background image.
   • Tell your husband that you have not been feeling well all day. When he is somewhat distracted, tell him you are going to take your temperature. Come back and tell him you need help reading the thermometer and place the positive pregnancy test in his hand.
   • Ask your husband to sign a birthday card for a friend. Hand him the positive pregnancy test instead of a pen.
2. Present your husband with a special gift. Give your husband a special gift to mark the occasion of telling him your news. A personalized present may heighten the surprise and anticipation as you tell him—especially if he’s not expecting it—and may also give you a special memento of the day.
   • Make a custom t-shirt with cute, short message. You can make the t-shirt for anyone: for your husband, a tee with the word “dad” would work. You could also get a shirt with “bun in the oven” or a shirt for one of your other children, if you have them, that says “big brother” or “big sister.”
   • You could purchase keepsakes such as a silver cup or silver teething ring. You can write a special message in a card that says “in a few months, we can engrave this with the newest member of our family’s name.”
   • Consider something that your husband loves and incorporate that into a gift. For example, if your husband loves hiking, buy a small pair of hiking boots and backpack and say “for your new hiking partner.”
   • Purchase a small ceramic piggy bank and write “Baby’s College Fund” on it.
   • You could hide the gift in his dresser, closet, or gym bag so that he finds out in the course of day when he likely least expects it.
3. Enjoy a special meal—with an added surprise. Either cook a special meal or go out to your favorite restaurant. Use this occasion to put a surprise in your husband’s meal or tell him at a key moment you’re together.
   • You can cook your husband’s favorite foods or a “baby specific” specific meal of foods like baby corn, baby carrots, or even baby food.
   • You can go out to your favorite restaurant to make the occasion more special or memorable.
   • You can incorporate different ways to tell your husband. For example, you could buy a plastic baby at a party supply store and put it in the food or ask the restaurant to put it in whatever dish he orders.
   • You could get a bottle of wine and have a special label placed on it telling your husband he’s going to be a dad. Likewise, you can make a label for something you are cooking together at home.
   • If your husband suggests wine or beer over dinner, say you can’t have it and explain why. You can use a cute phrase like “our baby doesn’t like the taste of wine (or beer) just yet.”
   • Tell him with a dessert. Bake or buy a cake with the message such as “congrats, you’re going to be a dad!”
4. Send a card from your baby. Purchase a beautiful card or some nice paper and compose a letter or note from your baby to your husband. It doesn’t need to be long or elaborate, just fun, warm, and to the point.
   • You don’t necessarily need to buy a baby card. A plain card can help heighten the surprise.
   • Send the card in the mail so that your husband doesn’t have an idea what’s in the card. You may want to consider having someone else write it so he doesn’t recognize your handwriting.
   • Write something like “Dear Christopher, I can’t wait to meet you in eight months and I know mom is looking forward to enjoying new adventures with both of us.” Sign the card “your baby.”
5. Announce the news through another family member. If you have a pet or other children, let them break the happy news to your husband. This may catch him off guard and make him even more surprised or may also make another funny memory.
   • If you have a dog or cat, you could place a small placard around their neck to announce the news.
   • You could also find some type of toy that your dog or cat can present to your husband that will clue him in to the new arrival.
   • Have one of your other children tell your husband. It can be a very simple message such as “mom says she’s having another baby” or another phrase that plays on your child’s personality.
6. Purchase signage. You can buy some type of signage to tell your husband the news. You can go big and bold via a billboard, or get something small like a “baby on board sign” for your car.
   • Make sure the sign is commensurate with your husband’s personality. For example, if you’ve been trying to get pregnant for a while and your husband is outgoing, you could put a billboard up on his daily commute so that he’ll see it when he least suspects it.
   • If your husband is shy or you don’t want to broadcast your news to the world just yet, you can get a discreet “baby on board” sign for your car. Either place it in the car or nonchalantly around your house so he finds it.
   • Write the good news on a tiny piece of paper that can fit into a fortune cookie. Order Chinese food and replace the message in the fortune cookie with yours. Make that sure that he reads his fortune and gets the surprise! You may even be able to purchase fortune cookies specifically with the surprise that your husband is going to be a dad. Many companies offer this kind of product.
7. Stage a scene. Borrow baby paraphernalia from a friend or pick some up at a local store. Scatter the items all over the house while your husband is at work. When he comes home, let him figure out what’s going on or allow him to ask you before sharing the great news.
   • You could get toys and stage a “playroom” scene in your living room. Try bottles or baby food jars in your kitchen for a similar effect.
8. Create a scavenger hunt. Buy a few inexpensive items that hint at your pregnancy and place these around your house. Hide yourself and leave a note for him to point you to your hiding place so that you can deliver your good news.
   • Scatter the items around the house for your husband to find with clues at each stage. Hopefully, he’ll figure out your message before he finds you!
9. Park in an “expectant mothers” spot. Take a trip to a local store with your husband and offer to drive. When you arrive at the parking lot, pull into an expectant mothers parking spot.

Preparing for Baby Together

1. Realize that life will change. Having a baby changes individual lives and that of a couple in significant ways. By understanding and talking about the inevitable changes that will happen, you can prevent misunderstandings and potential problems in your relationship.
   • Women are hard-wired to focus on nurturing their baby in the first few months after birth. Being aware of this along with inherent changes can help your husband prepare himself mentally.
   • For example, most women don’t want to have sex in the initial months after giving birth—and some don’t even want to have sex during pregnancy. But men don’t experience this change. Understand that it’s hormonal and make a plan for how you’ll deal with it.
2. Inform yourselves. There are all kinds of books and websites available to help you prepare for your child. Gather information from your doctor, friends, books, and websites to help you navigate your pregnancy as a couple.
   • Ask your doctor and friends for tips and resources that can be valuable during and after pregnancy.
   • You may want to consult sources that explain what is happening to your body at every stage so that you and your husband understand the changes you’re both experiencing.
3. Work on your relationship. One of the best gifts you can give your baby is a strong partnership. Keeping your relationship strong and healthy throughout your pregnancy and beyond can help you effectively prepare and care for your baby.
   • It’s important at this time to have discussions about all kinds of matters including expectations, family values and how you’ll raise your children. Even if you can agree completely, you can find some kind of compromise that may help to prevent undermining your relationship.
   • Schedule ample time together to enjoy life as a couple. You can go for walks or have more formal date nights or vacations to strengthen your bond.
4. Discuss budget and workload. Babies are expensive and require a lot of time and attention. Talking about your finances and how you’ll share the work of taking care of your baby can help avoid miscommunications down the road.
   • You may want to discuss workload during your pregnancy, especially as you get into your third trimester, when it can get difficult to move. Talk about cleaning and feeding pets, and other household work you share.
   • Consider talking about how this will change once your baby arrives and how you will tackle household work with a newborn, which can help prevent couples from getting resentful of one another.
5. Involve your husband as much as possible. Keeping your husband an active part of your preparations for baby is key to maintaining your relationship and helping him to at least preliminarily bond with the baby. Make sure to schedule doctor’s appointments so that he can attend and purchase baby gear together to help enjoy your impending arrival more fully.
   • You don’t necessarily need a fully designed nursery, but create your baby’s room with your husband. Buy furniture, clothing and any other accouterments together.
   • Make sure your husband is present for important doctor’s appointments, including sonograms or listening to the heartbeat.

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