Love Your Wife According to the Bible

Did you know that there are Biblical commands for husbands? Husbands have responsibilities to love and honor their wives. Would you like to be a husband who loves his wife as Christ loved the Church? Here are some tips on how to do so.

Steps

  1. "Love your wife as Christ loved the Church."(Ephesians 5:25) This means that you should be willing to risk your life to help or save your wife. Christ's love for the church is without limits; nothing is held back. He gave His life for the church - before we loved Him. "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." His love does not depend on your love for Him; His love is unconditional. Under God's leadership and help- love your wife as a service--as giving your life to God. Loving your wife is to be your primary ministry as a husband.
  2. "Love your wife in the same way that you love your body and your life."(Ephesians 5:28-33) You care for your body daily. You try to be as well fed and healthy as is possible. You quickly take care of any needs or desires that you may have. Any sexual desire as a husband should be cared for with your wife. In the same way, care for your wife's needs and well being. Feel your wife's pain and illnesses and rejoice in her health and happiness as if it were your own life. A husband must see his wife's sexual desires and make supreme efforts to meet those needs too. Basically, her needs or desires, whether they are financial, physical, emotional or spiritual, must receive your full attention. In this way, you can love her and provide for her, just as much as you do for yourself.
  3. "Be considerate as you live with your wife, with respect ..."(I Peter 3:7) The Bible says that if we neglect this command, our prayers will be hindered! To be considerate means to quit any irritating habits! When she needs to be helped with carrying heavy items, do it! If she needs time to herself, take care of the children for her for a bit! Help your wife in any way you can. Show your love to her and always be considerate of her needs and wants. Pray and ask God to show you where you may be inconsiderate.
  4. "Do not be harsh with your wife."(Colossians 3:19) Women are a lot more sensitive than men, so realize that harsh words, angry looks, irritated tones of voice and impatience will deeply affect your wife. Rejoice that she is a lady and isn't like you. Remember that she is a precious gift that God has given you and always be thankful for her.
  5. "The husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife."(I Corinthians 7:3-5) Please your wife physically. Don't deprive her of what she needs. Sexual pleasure is something that is given, not forced or taken. Discuss with her what her needs are both inside and outside of the bedroom.
  6. "Rejoice in your wife all your life. Let her body satisfy you. Be captivated with her."(Proverbs 5:18-19) No man should look at other women, or pictures of other women, when he has a wife on whom he can gaze daily. A husband should become fully satisfied with his wife's body. No matter what the size or shape, if a man will try, and ask God to help him, he can grow to truly find his wife's body to be the most attractive in the world. This is the true spirit of being captivated with your wife. If you show that you are attracted to her, she will feel sexy and lady-like.
  7. "Women may be dressed in simple clothing, with a quiet and serious air; not with vanity about her hair and gold or jewels or expensive clothing;"(1 Timothy 2:9) Encourage your wife to be modest in public and erotic in private with you. A modest woman is a lady. There is so much sin and temptation that results from women showing too much skin in public. Just think of the pleasure of knowing that no one sees too much of your wife's legs but you! You will be shocked at how this one maneuver will increase your feelings of masculinity and her feelings of femininity.
  8. "Do not be captivated by other women."(Proverbs 5:20) Finding other women attractive and looking at them will degrade your view of your own wife, because you will start to compare her with them. You will be less satisfied with her, and she will feel less special to you. No man can build a habit of glances without subconsciously doing it in his wife's company, and she will definitely notice and be hurt. Remember to be captivated with your wife and no one else. She will feel like the Queen of the world as you fall more and more in love with her.
  9. "Call your wife 'blessed' and praise her."(Proverbs 31:28-29) Tell her that she is special and that she is greater than any other woman on earth. Don't just mention her physical beauty, but compliment her on her care for you, her hard work, and her lady-like attributes. Watch the flower of your wife's heart blossom as you repeatedly fill her ears with your praises. She longs for those words and she wants to hear them from you! You may not want to cause her to be too prideful, but your wife needs and longs to be treasured by you.
  10. "Tell your wife how captivated you are with her body."(Song of Solomon 4:7; 7:1-8) A true lover will make sure that his wife knows that he finds no flaw in her. God made your wife, and God makes no mistakes. If you find a part of her body flawed, then it is your mind that needs to be changed. The responsibility upon the man to grow to love, and express love, for every part of his wife is needed. Also, respectfully and sensually tell her so. It will not help to criticize her or to be sarcastic. If you do this, it will probably result in her wanting to be less romantic with you less often. Think of how good she will feel when both you and her truly believe that you are enamored with every part of her!
  11. "Honor your marriage; keep it pure by remaining true to your wife in every way."(Hebrews 13:4) Jesus says that "lustful looks are adultery."(Matthew 5:28) This is similar to "where your treasure is, there will your heart be also..."(Luke 12:34). Do not treasure such lust in any area of life. Deny it access to you heart. Keep your marriage pure by training your heart and eyes to be true to your wife. Your marriage will reap huge benefits if you do and will hopefully last for a lifetime!
    • Thank the Lord for beauty and appreciate it, but keep your eye, joy, mind and heart always and only on your wife.
  12. "Be thankful for your wife and realize the favor you have received from God."(Proverbs 18:22) Just think of how lonely you would be without a wife. Adam was alone and it wasn't good for him to be alone, so God gave him a wife. You have a lifetime companion, a friend, and a lover to enjoy every day. What a blessing! Thank God and pray for her daily. She is a tremendous "prize" from God.
  13. "Be one flesh with your wife in every way."(Matthew 19:5) Enjoy life with her as if you want to be inseparable from her. Long to be with her, like you did when you first met. Rush home from work to see her. Think about her during the day. Call her every day and text her as much as you can. Learn as a couple to agree on everything and be like-minded. Enjoy intimacy and sex often. You should have sex as often as is necessary to meet the desires of whichever spouse has the stronger sex drive, and as schedules and health permit. Spend time just talking and sharing the day's events. Show a genuine interest and listen intently to your wife. Give her your full attention and eye contact anytime she is talking to you. Your wife is more important than anything or anyone alive but Jesus Christ. Be unified and one with your wife.



Tips

  • Your marriage may be somewhat broken, but God can heal brokenness and heartaches. God can take away all strife and worries, since all things are possible in Jesus' name.
  • Love your wife "unconditionally," as in, no matter how she is with you, show her love. Help her through bad hair days, bad moods, if she put on a few (or too many) pounds, has illness or depression issues (seek appropriate help!). Always be there for her and support her through everything.
  • You need to be patient and understanding with your wife. Respect her feelings and give her the love that she deserves.
  • For encouragement, read these stories of how God can restore broken marriages.
  • Share responsibilities and work loads equitably, including household chores and family duties. Make her load lighter so that she has less stress.
  • Be honest and faithful and true to your wife. Show her your appreciation for her, and always be gentle with her feelings. Lies and deception lead only to heart ache and grief for both parties in the end.
  • Also a good resource is the "Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage" video clips on YouTube.

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Sources and Citations

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