Convince Your Parents to Let You Redecorate Your Room

It's normal to outgrow the decorations in your room. You can make small tweaks on your own, such as changing your posters and rearranging furniture. However, if you want major renovations, you need your parents' help. Approach your parents when you're both calm. Let them know exactly how you plan to redecorate and explain why you feel the need for change. Listen to their perspective and try to reach a solution that works for everyone.

Steps

Making Decisions about the Conversation

  1. Pick an ideal time to talk. Sometimes, when you talk can be as important as the conversation itself. When deciding how to have the conversation, think about a good time to talk.[1]
    • You don't want to bombard your parents when they're already busy or stressed. Aim to talk at a time when your parents are normally at ease.
    • For example, say your parents usually unwind and watch television on Wednesday nights. This may be a good time to approach them instead of, say, approaching them on a Tuesday night, when they both have busy schedules.
  2. Think about what you need from the conversation. You don't want to go into the conversation without a plan. Think about your own feelings and needs. Identify why you want to redecorate your room. Why is this important to you and how can you best convey this to your parents?[2]
    • Oftentimes, redecoration is about something deeper. Maybe you're getting older and your room no longer reflects your personality. Maybe your tastes have changed over the years, and you want something that reflects your individuality.
    • Instead of just talking about your plans to redecorate, show your parents why it's important to you. Talk about how your room is your sanctuary, and how you want it to express the person you are becoming.
  3. Figure out what you can offer in return. Your parents want you to learn responsibility. If you request a big change, such as reorganizing your room, they may expect you to do something in exchange for this. Think about what you can trade in exchange for the right to redecorate.[3]
    • Find some specific ways you can offer a trade. Think about things your parents value. Is there anything they frequently want you to do differently? Maybe they want you to bring your grades up or help out around the house more.
    • Offer a few specific things you'll change if your parents let you redecorate your room. You can, for example, agree to keep your room cleaner in exchange for being allowed to redecorate.
  4. Rehearse what you're going to say. You don't want to go into the conversation without practicing a little. Talking to your parents can be nerve racking, so go over a few ways to start the conversation in your head.[2]
    • Figure out how you'll get your parents attention. For example, practice saying something like, "Mom, Dad, could I talk to you?"
    • Practice your opening sentence a few times in front of the mirror. It doesn't have to be too elaborate. Something as simple as, "I wanted to talk about my room" can be sufficient.

Talking to Your Parents

  1. Let your parents know you want to talk. Begin the conversation directly. Approach your parents when they're not busy and let them know there's something you would like to discuss. Say something like, "Mom, Dad, do you have a minute? I wanted to ask you guys about something?"[2]
  2. Express gratitude as you ask permission. Parents want to make sure you understand and appreciate responsibility. If you simply ask to redecorate your room with no real introduction, they may think you don't get how much money goes into the cost of renovations. Begin asking by expressing gratitude for how hard your parents work to give you the advantages you have.[3]
    • Say something like, "I know you guys work really hard so we can have this great house. I really appreciate being able to have my own room and my own space."
    • You want to make sure your parents know you appreciate what you have in the present. You need to let them know you do appreciate your room, even if you want to change it.
  3. Be specific about what you want. Make a clear request. This will give your parents a clear sense of what they're saying "Yes" to. Talk to them about what, specifically, you want to change about your room and what kind of help you'll need from them.[4]
    • Tell them what your ideal is for redecoration. For example, "Ideally, I want to repaint the room in a color I like. I don't really like yellow anymore, so I would really like to paint it blue or green."
    • Keep in mind, not all of your requests may be met. Tell your parents what you want directly, but be prepared to potentially compromise.
  4. Offer to pay for some of the decoration costs. Redecorating costs money. Even if your parents can afford to revamp your room, they want you to know the value of money. If you volunteer to take care of some of the costs, your parents are more likely to say "Yes" to your request.[3]
    • Tell them how you plan to help pay for the re-decorations. For example, you can say something like, "I've been saving about $30 of my babysitting money every month for awhile now. I can put that towards paint."

Dealing With Their Decision

  1. Listen to your parents' perspective. Your parents will likely have opinions on the matter. Try not to argue with them or interrupt. Instead, stay calm and try to see their point of view. They may have a point that you're overlooking.[2]
    • For example, your parents may worry about your tastes changing fast. If you're still young, you may change your mind again in the future. It's likely you've cycled through a variety of favorite colors and styles in the past few years, and your parents may not want to waste money redecorating if you're going to want to redo your room again before long.
    • Try to really consider their point of view. Reflect on your tastes, and how quickly they change. Maybe you want to paint your room green, but green has only been your favorite color for a few months. It may be reasonable to hold off on repainting until your tastes are more stable.
  2. Avoid arguing. Arguing is not going to get you anywhere. It's only going to frustrate your parents. If your parents think you're being immature or difficult, they're much less likely to say "Yes" to your request.[2]
    • Even if you're getting frustrated, watch your tone. A friendly, respectful tone will be more effective than raising your voice or complaining.
  3. Offer to compromise. Your parents may so "No" to some of your requests. If this happens, be open to compromise. Instead of getting argumentative, consider their perspective and see if you can reach an agreement that works for everyone.[5]
    • For example, say your parents say "No" to repainting. It's expensive and time consuming, and they're worried you'll change your mind in the future.
    • Try to see if they'd be willing to meet you halfway. Instead of repainting, maybe they would let you put up some temporary wallpaper.
  4. Accept the decision for now. There's always a chance your parents will not agree to your request. In this case, the best thing to do is to accept a "No" for the time being. In the future, you can ask again. If you're mature and go along with your parents decisions, this increases the likelihood they'll say "Yes" in the future. They will see that you're mature, which will make them more likely to allow you to make some of your own decisions.[2]

Tips

  • Try to incorporate what you already have into your design. It will save time and money, and increase the chances of your parents saying yes.
  • Have a basic plan ready for your room because if you know how you want it then it will save time.

Related Articles

Sources and Citations

  1. ↑ http://counselingmn.com/how-to/how-to-get-your-parents-to-say-yes/
  2. ↑ 2.0 2.1 2.2 2.3 2.4 2.5 http://kidshealth.org/en/kids/talk-parents.html
  3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/hanaan-rosenthal/advice-for-teens_b_2037523.html
  4. ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/margiewarrell/2013/04/24/7-keys-to-asking-for-what-you-really-want-so-you-get-it/#6d5d21a53ec7
  5. ↑ http://www.teenissues.co.uk/copingwithstrictparents.html
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