Distract Yourself from Things You Don't Want to Think About

If certain thoughts or memories cause you to feel sad or anxious, you may be looking for an outlet to distract yourself from these thoughts. Finding distractions can help you get your mind off upsetting or negative thoughts. Everyone has distressing things that they may not want to think about. However, sometimes these thoughts might point to a serious condition like anxiety, depression, or post-traumatic stress. Keep in mind that often the only way to truly move on from upsetting thoughts or events (i.e. abuse, tragic accidents, mental illness, etc.) is to talk them over with a mental health professional. You can get started on handling what's causing your focus on negative or unhelpful thoughts by seeking to understand them.

Steps

Easing Your Mind

  1. Keep a journal. One reason it can be hard to stop thinking about something is because we keep trying to force those thoughts out of our minds. Unfortunately, this can often emphasize them even more, and bring in unhelpful feelings like guilt or shame ("Why can't I stop thinking about this?"). Keep a mental health journal to give yourself space to explore your feelings and thoughts, even the ones that cause you sadness or anxiety.[1]
    • Keeping a journal allows you to acknowledge your thoughts and feelings and give them space to just exist. Write an entry any time you feel overwhelmed by things that you don't want to think about. Get the thoughts down on paper, then shut the book and go and do something else.
    • Try to think about when these things you don't want to think about first began. Did something happen to trigger them? What experiences surround them? Does thinking about them interfere with your ability to live your daily life?
    • Journaling may improve your mental stability by relieving symptoms of anxiety and depression. Writing your thoughts down in your journal can also offer insights on patterns of upsetting thoughts and help you understand potential triggers.[1]
    • Journaling about unwanted thoughts can bring up repressed memories. If you have experienced a great deal of abuse or a difficult childhood, journal only with the help of your therapist.
  2. Break the rumination cycle. Ruminating refers to mulling an issue over and over in your mind. Typically, this involves a negative thought or worry. If you feel the need to distract yourself from your thoughts, you may be ruminating. It's important to overcome this habit because rumination is closely linked to major depression.[2]Here are just a few ways you can jump off the rumination train:
    • Find other sources of self-esteem. You may be thinking about a perceived flaw constantly because you see it as being a huge part of your self-concept and identity. Beyond the one flaw, highlight other areas in which you have talents and strengths. That way, any single criticism (from others or yourself) won't cause you so much distress.
    • Problem-solve bit by bit. If you find yourself ruminating on an issue, make strides to resolve it. This may seem overwhelming at first but if you break the larger problem down into smaller pieces, you can work towards figuring out one piece at a time. Then, the problem won't seem so daunting.
    • Let go of extreme expectations and standards. Some people expect 100% perfection or effort from themselves or others at all times. These are unreasonable and unattainable expectations that keep you from adapting to the challenges of life.[3] If you are one of these people, you might begin to feel low or upset when your standards are not met. Retrain yourself to have feasible expectations of both yourself and others. Remember, everyone is only human - and humans can't be perfect.
  3. Engage in mindful meditation.[4] Mindfulness means being aware of the present moment.This is the practice of being present in the here and now. The idea is to slow down your thoughts and become aware of constant thoughts that keep popping into your mind.
    • If you are a beginner, choose a spot that is quiet with little distractions. Sit comfortably, whether on a chair or on a floor cushion. Cross your legs (if on the floor). Straighten your upper body and place your hands on your thighs. Take a deep, cleansing breath, pulling in through your nose and out through your mouth. Focus on your breath - only on your breath. When you find your attention straying from your breath, just note that and return to your breath and stay there.
    • For starters, aim for approximately five or ten minutes of mindful meditation before building up to longer periods.
    • Some types of mindfulness meditation encourage you to focus only on your breath while others acknowledge each thought that comes into your mind. To determine which type is right for you, visit Greater Good.[5]
  4. Continue mindfulness practices in all your activities.[6] A wonderful way to stay in the moment and avoid getting lost in negative thoughts is to practice mindfulness routinely. This can be very effective for minimizing rumination and easing your mind of troublesome worries or concerns.
    • When you wake up in the morning, take a deep, calming breath. Do some light stretching and think about how each stretch feels to your body's muscles and joints. Drink a glass of water and notice the temperature, the consistency and how it feels going down your throat. Stay present in each activity that you take part in throughout the day: showering, brushing your teeth, eating, driving, working, etc..
    • As you go throughout each activity, refrain from casting judgments about what you're doing or letting your mind wander. When you notice your mind wandering, return to the activity at hand and consider how the activity affects each of your senses.

Being Creative

  1. Write, draw, or paint. Use your hands and your imagination to make something from nothing. Being creative can maximize your well-being and give you positive feelings about what you're doing with your time. Plus, some research suggests that creativity may improve cognitive flexibility and problem-solving. Therefore, exercising your creativity may actually help you to come up with solutions to the issues that are bothering you.[7]
  2. Cook or bake. If you enjoy cooking or baking, these activities can serve as a great distraction to unpleasant thoughts. Preparing a meal can bring about feelings of accomplishment and build your confidence. What's more, you can share what you make with others to spread these good feelings around.
    • One precaution to consider when it comes to cooking or baking is to not let this activity become an unhealthy behavior in which you overeat to soothe an uncomfortable mood or distract yourself from upsetting thoughts. Include others in your cooking sessions to minimize the opportunity to eat emotionally - and to help you clear the dishes after.[8]
  3. Try a puzzle. Puzzles are frequently used in educational therapy because they require focus, patience, and creativity. They can help with distraction, unorganized thinking, and trouble with motivation. For this reason, they also work as a good temporary distraction, because you have to concentrate on solving the puzzle.[9]
    • Find puzzles that you enjoy and will hold your attention. Crossword puzzles and Sudoku are very common puzzles that are easy to find almost anywhere.
    • You could also try a jigsaw puzzle, if you enjoy putting things together. Seeing the puzzle come together could also give you a nice feeling of accomplishment.
    • Many mobile apps and websites have puzzle games, so you can take this healthy distraction anywhere.

Using Entertainment as a Distraction

  1. Watch TV or a DVD or look at memes. Humor is good for distracting yourself from negative thoughts or memories. Looking at a meme account with a long history is also a great way to keep yourself chuckling and in good spirits. Head to Instagram and search for "#meme" until you find an account that has a style of humor that you enjoy.
    • Beware that watching TV in excess is a sedentary behavior which can be linked to a shorter lifespan and obesity.[10]
    • Avoid snacking while watching TV as this can lead to mindless eating, and may only make you feel worse.
    • Try balancing your TV time with physical activity such as watching while walking on a treadmill or an elliptical. If you do not have access to such equipment, you can simply perform a series of exercises during commercials or about every 15 to 20 minutes.
  2. Listen to music. Music has been used to express feelings since humans first figured out how to make it. Research has also shown that it's helpful to reduce stress and promote relaxation.[11]
    • Music with about 60 beats per minute can encourage your brainwaves to synchronize with that beat, resulting in a relaxed state.
    • While popular conceptions suggest that only "soft" music, such as classical, jazz, or New Age, are relaxing, new research suggests otherwise. A recent study showed that listening to "extreme metal music" helped participants process feelings of anger and return to feeling positive and even inspired.[12] What seems to matter the most is what feels best for you. Listen to music you enjoy and connect with.
  3. Go online. A moderate amount of computer use can be entertaining and relaxing. Online you can play games, go window shopping for clothes or accessories, catch up with old friends via social networks, read interesting articles about your favorite topics or Edit a wikiHow Page. Take note of how much time you're spending on the computer.
    • Research shows that more than two hours of screen time for kids can be potentially damaging to health, leading to weight gain, aggression, and disrupted sleep patterns. Try to budget your screen time with other things like spending time with friends or family or going outside.[13]
  4. Read a book. Find an intriguing novel, comic book, or magazine to keep you engaged. Leisure reading provides an escape from everyday activities, allowing you to boost your creativity and imagination. Reading also enhances cognitive skills and vocabulary.[14]
    • Be sure to read something that is light or humorous rather than an upsetting topic that might cause you to think about what you're trying to avoid.

Getting Physical

  1. Hit the gym. Exercise can calm feelings of anxiety and stress by releasing endorphins, natural mood-boosting chemicals that your body produces.[15] Studies have shown that people just "feel better" after doing moderate aerobic exercise.[16] So the next time you find yourself needing a distraction from something you don't want to think about, grab your sneakers and go for a run, or hit the gym to lift some weights.
  2. Garden. Do some gardening. Plant a tree, an edible garden or an ornamental patch of flowers. Gardening can deliver three advantages. First, being outside can increase positive feelings and reduce stress.[17] Secondly, the physical exertion required for gardening can produce feel-good endorphins and help you fight obesity. Finally, if you plant herbs or foods you save yourself money and ensure that you are eating a healthy, balanced diet.[18]
  3. Take a warm shower or bath. Research suggests that merely taking a hot shower can help reduce anxiety.[16] Simply being physically warm can help you feel more relaxed and even more oriented to social relationships.[19] Focus on the sensations you experience in the shower or bath: the water on your skin, the warmth that surrounds you. Take deep breaths. Allow the experience to become a mindfulness exercise in noticing and relishing the pleasant sensations.
    • You may find that adding a few drops of lavender oil to your shower or bath also help you feel more positive and relaxed.[20]

Spending Time with Others

  1. Call up or visit friends or family. Whether your friends or family are near or far, whenever you need a positive, healthy distraction from upsetting thoughts, you can call them. You can even give your friend/relative a heads up that you are calling to get your mind off a specific topic - that way they don't inadvertently bring it up.
    • If your friends, parents, siblings, or other loved ones live nearby, set up a date to hang out with one another. Go on an outing together. See a movie, go bowling, go swimming, or participate in a shared hobby.
    • Not only will spending time with others make you happy, it can also prolong your life. Scientists are now comparing loneliness to the equivalent of using tobacco - it can be detrimental to both mental and physical health.[21]
  2. Play with your pet. When your friends or family are unavailable, it can be a great distraction to spend time with another companion, your pet. Dogs and cats, in particular, are linked to reduced depression and a longer life span. Plus, if you take your dog to the park, you can get much-needed physical activity by walking a few laps or throwing a Frisbee around.
  3. Volunteer. Visit a place that needs help and give your skills and time to a worthy cause. This will not only distract you, but can also help you to realize that there are people worse off than you, animals in need of your help and an environment that you can be helping to improve.
    • Volunteering also offers many health advantages. It can ward off loneliness and depression and make you feel more connected to your community. Research also demonstrates that people with purely altruistic reasons for volunteering (i.e. to help others rather than help themselves) live longer.[22]

Tips

  • Surround yourself with positive people and hobbies that you enjoy to take your mind off the things you don't want to think about.

Warnings

  • If distracting yourself from one thought leads to unhealthy behaviors like excess eating, drinking or using drugs, you need to see a mental health provider who can help you develop healthier coping strategies to overcome these upsetting thoughts or stressors.
  • Repetitive intrusive thoughts may represent the obsessions associated with obsessive-compulsive disorder. In addition to the compulsive behaviors like repeated checking and rituals, OCD is also marked by obsessions such as excessive worries, concerns, or fears.[23]See a mental health provider if these symptoms describe what you're going through.

Related Articles

Sources and Citations

  1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx?ContentTypeID=1&ContentID=4552
  2. ↑ http://www.apa.org/monitor/nov05/cycle.aspx
  3. ↑ http://www.apa.org/monitor/nov03/manyfaces.aspx
  4. ↑ http://www.mindful.org/mindfulness-how-to-do-it/
  5. ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/which_kind_of_mindfulness_meditation_is_right_for_you
  6. ↑ http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/06/09/7-easy-ways-to-be-mindful-every-day/
  7. ↑ https://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/learn/creativity
  8. ↑ file:///C:/Users/User/Downloads/Eating.pdf
  9. ↑ http://eric.ed.gov/?id=ED256086
  10. ↑ http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/obesity-prevention-source/obesity-causes/television-and-sedentary-behavior-and-obesity/
  11. ↑ http://www.unr.edu/counseling/virtual-relaxation-room/releasing-stress-through-the-power-of-music
  12. ↑ http://journal.frontiersin.org/article/10.3389/fnhum.2015.00272/pdf
  13. ↑ http://scopeblog.stanford.edu/2010/10/11/tv_and_kids_mental_health/
  14. ↑ http://www2.palomar.edu/telescope/2015/04/27/five-life-enhancing-benefits-of-reading-books-regularly/
  15. ↑ http://www.adaa.org/living-with-anxiety/managing-anxiety/exercise-stress-and-anxiety
  16. ↑ 16.0 16.1 http://psycnet.apa.org/psycinfo/1986-30693-001
  17. ↑ http://www.takingcharge.csh.umn.edu/enhance-your-wellbeing/environment/nature-and-us/how-does-nature-impact-our-wellbeing
  18. ↑ http://msue.anr.msu.edu/news/what_are_the_physical_and_mental_benefits_of_gardening
  19. ↑ http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4234632/
  20. ↑ http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0965229902000869
  21. ↑ https://bewell.stanford.edu/features/social-ties-good-health
  22. ↑ http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/volunteering-may-be-good-for-body-and-mind-201306266428
  23. ↑ http://www.adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/obsessive-compulsive-disorder-ocd/symptoms
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