Get Served Quickly at the Bar

If you're at a crowded bar, getting served a drink can be a daunting task. There are things you can do - and things you shouldn't do - to get on the bartender's good side and minimize the time you spend waiting.

Steps

  1. Be prepared. Have your money in hand and know exactly what you're going to order. The more efficient your transaction, the better your relationship with the bartender and the more likely you are to get served quickly. Do not, under any circumstances, wait until you have been served to start fumbling around in your wallet or adding drinks to your order.
  2. Choose your spot wisely. Here are some suggestions:
    • If there is more than one bartender, make sure to position yourself in a spot between two bartenders' "territories". Bartenders will often serve these customers first in order to secure their tips, while a customer standing well within one bartender's territory has no choice but to wait at that bartender's mercy.
    • Walk to the corner or the edge of the bar. Sometimes the bartender will think you're there to pay; if this happens, say "No, I'm just here to get a quick drink. If I'm in the wrong place, I apologize." The bartender might get your drink anyway.
  3. Snake your hand through the crowd until it touches the bar. Getting your hand on the bar top is like staking a flag in the ground. Once you've done this the territory is yours. Draw your body in through any space that opens up. As soon as someone moves away, turn your body flush with the bar, with both hands planted on the woodwork.
  4. Catch the bartender's eye as soon as possible. When you make eye contact (for what will probably be a very brief moment in time) be sure to smile and tilt your chin up. However, don't do any of the following to hasten the process; it will only annoy the bartender and delay your drink:
    • Don't yell "bartender!". See the Warnings below for more "terms of endearment" to avoid.
    • Don't wave your money. Have it ready in your hand, but don't flash it to get the bartender's attention. This is often considered condescending.
    • Don't snap your fingers.
    • Don't say "I'm next" or "I was here first." The bartender decides who's next.
  5. Give your order quickly, loudly and clearly. See How to Order a Drink at a Bar.
  6. Tip generously. If you are planning a whole night's drinking, smart tipping will ensure prompt service on future orders. Give the bartender a big tip in cash when you pay for your first drink. The bigger the tip, the more likely the bartender is to get your drink to you immediately, skipping over other people to do so.

Tips

  • Friends and regulars always get served faster. In any bar you visit frequently, make friends with the bartenders. Strike up a friendly conversation on slow nights. Order politely. Remember to say thanks. Earn a reputation for tipping well. Being on the bartender's side is key.
  • Flirt. It may not be the classiest move, but complimenting the bartender or using your wit and charm while the bartender is making someone else's drink could make you the obvious choice for next in line.

Warnings

  • Under no circumstances speak of the bar or waitstaff condescendingly to other patrons while waiting to be served. It will be heard and will in most cases work to your detriment.
  • Always drink responsibly.
  • Don't call the bartender's attention to you with "terms of endearment". Here are some pet names that you should NEVER use for someone who is serving you:

    • Pal, Sport, Tiger, or any variation
    • Buddy - unless he actually is your buddy or Buddy is his name
    • Son, Boy, or Kid - unless you actually are that person's parent
    • Boss - generally perceived as condescending, unless you speak to them with the respect due to a superior
    • Killer - unless you want it to come true
    • Sugar, Honey, or any variation
    • Babe - unless the two of you sleep in the same bed
    • Chief - they're not fire fighters or cops
    • Captain - they're not commanding a boat and you aren't a sailor
    • Toots, or any variation
    • Young Fellow - unless you're over 80, it's just nerve-racking
    • Big Guy - like "Boss," this term may be perceived as rude or condescending
    • Dude - Oh, dude! Please don't!
    • Barkeep
    • Sir, Miss or Ma'am

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