Solve a Fight with Your Best Friend
Many people have arguments with their best friends once or twice, but that doesn't make them enemies. The best thing to do is try to get out of your fight (after solving it, of course!) with no hard feelings or grudges. You can learn how below.
Steps
- Identify the problem. Sometimes it's obvious, but sometimes it's pretty hard to determine. Also, make sure there actually is a problem, and your friend isn't just having a bad day or they are having a tough time outside of the friendship.
- Have a look from their perspective. Talk to them about what they think you did wrong and it might turn out to be a big misunderstanding.
- Leave your friend alone. Instead of bombarding them with questions and demands, let them cool down and think about the situation. Do this until however long it takes for your friend to stop glaring at you in the halls, insulting you, spreading rumors, crying, etc.
- Consider your options. There's the classic "talk to your friend and ask them what's wrong", the "ask a friend to ask your friend what's wrong", or even the "leave him/her alone until everyone forgets about it". Of course every situation is different, but talking to your friend directly is almost always the best option, even though it may be scary.
- Choose an option and do it. It's better to remain modest instead of staying on your pedestal and playing innocent. Admitting all your faults will make that person feel better, and encourage them to do the same.
- Wait and see. Let your friend think about it.
- Accept the outcome. If your friend wants to cut the friendship for good, well, there's nothing to do about it. Don't get nasty or malicious; put all your effort into making a new best friend and remaining mature and nice by still saying hi to your friend in the halls, etc. Odds are, after you show him/her how nice you really are, they'll want to be friends again.
- Never leave the situation until it is beyond repair, if you don't sort it out sooner rather than later, your friend simply won't care and will have moved on.
- Don't try to make them jealous, because they may either not care and you will be embarrassed or, they may care and dislike you more.
- Don't do anything mean to 'get them back' or 'karma' if you are the victim, then let karma get them back another way, because if you do it, karma will get you back also.
- Don't do something you will regret.
Tips
- Make up fast. You will soon get to miss your best friend and you may grow apart if you wait too long. Go ahead and solve it.
- Drama doesn't help anything. Save the insults, yells, rumors, and gossip for a private place where no one will be able to use it against you
- Revenge is not the answer.
- Know that you did the right thing, even if your friend doesn't, but don't tell them that. Just feel good that you did everything you could to help, and that you did your best to fix your problem.
- Tell them your feelings and maybe you can make up and sort some things out.
- Talk to them and work it out.
- Don't let the problem take so long to be solved. While you're avoiding your friend, they might have already decided to move on to another friend who they can and will trust more than they did to you.
- Tell your friend that you're really sorry, and ask your friend to forgive you.
- Don't EVER bring it up again! Leave the bad memories in the past, for good ones in the future.
- Tell your friend the truth. Tell them all of your feelings for him/her.
- If you think the problem can't be solved then try to find a new friend but you must always try first, however hard it may be.
- Do whatever it takes to solve the problem and tell them exactly what you feel or else you'll never get out of it alive.
- Talk to her\him apologize even if they don't tell them how you felt when they turned their back.
- Talk to your mum or close adult, they won't tell everyone at school what you said or use the information you give them against you, plus, they have been through it all before, they know what's best, so when they give you advice, listen to it!
- Don't be jealous if your friend makes other friendship. Trust him/her and your friend will most likely come back to you!
- Write a letter to your friend explaining how you feel because it's easier to think before you write than to think before you speak, and that way you can get your thoughts out with no regrets.
- Give the person as much space as you can and try not to talk to them for a while until they say they're over it.
- Try to find out what you did wrong then you can know why they are fighting with you.
Warnings
- Don't do anything that might come back to haunt you just because your angry at the time, don't spread rumors or tell their secrets, it isn't worth it.
- Be prepared for any scenario, e.g, a break of friendships, and if that happens, always be nice and get some new friends that you can trust.
- If you aren't respectful, your friend will have a VERY hard time forgiving you.
Things You'll Need
- Respect for your friend and their wishes.
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