Get Your Crush to Be the Conversation Starter

Everyone has had a crush on someone at one point or another, but it's sometimes hard to get your crush to be the conversation starter instead of you! Fortunately for you, these simple steps should make it easier for you to get your wish.

Steps

For Girls

  1. Before you do anything else, find out a little more about your crush. Either strike up the courage to ask him yourself, or get the information from someone else.
    • Make sure you are aware if he is single or not.
      • You may want to get someone else to ask him for you, or ask one of his friends that you trust and are comfortable with. Make sure it's not obvious that you're interested in him, or there may be trouble!
      • If you find out that he already has a girlfriend, immediately back off. If his girlfriend suspects that you are trying to win him over, or she believes that he is cheating on her, there could be plenty of trouble, and you wouldn't want to get mixed up in that!
        • Your crush could also misunderstand your intentions, and think less of you.
    • Scope out where he usually sits, and who he usually sits with.
    • Familiarize yourself with his likes and dislikes.
    • Know his taste, and what types of girls he is interested in.
  2. Make sure your crush is aware of your existence. When you pass by him in the hallways, smile softly, and greet him with a simple, "Hey." If he smiles and greets you back, that's a good sign. If he ignores you, keep trying for a little bit, then stop if it's obvious he isn't interested in you.
    • Not only does this step ensure that your crush is aware of your existence, but it will also begin your relationship with him!
    • Make sure you don't overuse this step, as it will get a little creepy!
    • When you smile, don't smile widely, or you'll appear a little freakish. A soft, small but noticeable smile will make you look pretty, and he'll think of you as an approachable, friendly person.
  3. Make yourself available. On all of your social networks and websites, label yourself as "single". Include casually that you're single in all of your profile pages. Go even further, and - if possible - wear a single bracelet!
  4. Tweak your style to perk your crush's interest. You don't have to completely change it just for him, but try playing around with hairstyles and clothing till you find a good balance between what you feel comfortable in and what he likes to see girls wear.
    • For example: If your crush likes sporty girls and/or sports, wear a baseball cap or shirt (his favorite team, if possible).
      • Try to connect your style with his likes so that you form a link!
    • If he notices your clothing, and either compliments and/or asks you about it (ex: "Are you a Steelers' fan?"), play it cool, and act like it was a coincidence that you wore what he liked. However, try not to lie or make a habit of it.
  5. Take care of your hygiene. You don't need to go overboard, and stock up on all the perfumes and take a shower every hour that passes, but be clean and show him that you take good care of your body. Follow the steps below for good hygiene:
    • Take a shower every single day, using lukewarm water and an effective, nice-smelling soap. Spend no more than six minutes each time you take a shower, and make sure you scrub, not soak.
      • For soft skin, moisturize your entire body exactly fifteen minutes after you take your shower. This will enhance your skin very well!
    • Wash your hair no more than three times a week with an effective shampoo and conditioner, making sure they contain the proper, natural ingredients your hair type requires. Washing your hair too frequently can cause it to become oily, stinky, and dried up. No guy likes gross hair! Beware of washing your hair too few times as well.
      • If it appears that your shampoo and conditioner aren't working as well on your hair as you would like them to, try switching to a different brand or type that suits your hair type well.
    • Brush your teeth in the morning and at night with an effective toothpaste. Use mouthwash in the morning before you leave for school, and make sure you floss every day at night.
      • If you wear braces, make sure to take extra good care of your teeth!
    • Use a body and hand lotion that uses natural ingredients with no harmful chemicals in it. This will help make your skin smoother and softer, tempting your crush to want to feel how nice it is (he may or may not, depending on his personality and confidence).
    • Cleanse your face with a good cleanser twice a day - morning and night. Make sure your cleanser isn't too strong, or you'll experience more frequent outbreaks of nasty pimples. Rinse well with lukewarm water. Follow with toner and moisturizer.
      • Don't deprive your pimples of moisturizer, as they actually need plenty of moisture in order to heal effectively and quickly. However, be careful not to use too much moisturizer on them!
  6. Make sure you appear in several of the classes in your crush's schedule. You can either casually ask him ahead of time what classes he is planning to take, get a friend to ask him for you, or ask one of your crush's friends that you trust and are comfortable with.
    • Again, make sure it isn't obvious that you're interested in your crush, or word could get out and you'll be embarrassed!
    • Make sure you don't appear in every single class of your crush's. As tempting as the idea is, it'll freak him out and/or he'll become suspicious and perhaps withdrawn from you. Appear in at least three or more so that he'll notice you enough.
  7. Start friendly, comfortable conversations with your crush, and ask nice questions about him that will help you get to know more about him. If he is the confident type, he'll enjoy talking about himself. Make sure to put in some information about yourself as well, but limit it so that you sound a little mysterious, leaving him wanting to know more about you.
    • Don't blab out every bit of information about you, but give out just enough so that he has a basic knowledge of your personality and life.
    • Let him do most of the talking, unless if he seems uncomfortable with it. If your crush is the shy type, you may have to do most of the steering in the conversation, and try not to intimidate him. Be gentle, and talk softly enough so that he is comfortable with the volume of your voice.
    • Don't wait for your crush to start the conversation. At this point, you may have to start most of the conversations till you become a part of his daily life, and he'll begin to start the conversations when he recognizes you as that.
      • If you keep silent, and wait for your crush to come up to you and start the conversation, the chances of that happening is extremely low, unless if he is very interested in you and possibly curious enough to try to find out about you.
      • It's okay to be shy, but there is a limit to how shy you can get. Break out of your shell, or you'll never be able to make any progress in your relationship with your crush! Build your confidence, and tell yourself you can do it. If he is the right guy for you, you'll win him over. If he isn't, don't let him get to you, and simply move on with life.
  8. Slowly start to sit at your crush's table. Make random appearances here and there. If your crush or your crush's friend(s) question you, be ready with plausible excuses such as: "The other tables were full" or "My friend was sitting here, so I came to sit here too". Bring a trustworthy friend along to sit with you so that it doesn't seem awkward.
    • If your crush sits at an all-guys table, it's probably best to keep to your own tables. Sit near enough so that he notices you, but not in your crush's table if this happens to be the case.
      • Don't sit alone, or he'll think you're a loner and not be interested.
    • Keep in mind that once you become good enough friends with your crush, your friendship with him can be the key to unlock the borders blocking you from his all-guys table. Just make sure to bring a friend along if you're uncomfortable about sitting with all-guys. Plus, it could look suspicious to the students if you're the only girl at your crush's table.
    • Your crush may unexpectedly walk up to you, and invite you to sit with his table even if you two aren't close enough friends yet. Although this may be unlikely, it could happen, but don't wait for it to happen! Make it happen.
  9. At this point, if you've become good enough friends with your crush so that you're a part of his daily life and attention now, your crush should be naturally starting conversations with you instead of you doing all the starting.
  10. Finished.

Tips

  • Look clean and neat. Wear modest clothes, but at the same time, make sure they're attractive.
  • If your crush is a shy guy, it'll be really hard to get him to talk to you. You'll have to open him up a bit, and show that you want to talk to him before he'll realize that it's easy and natural to start conversations with you!
    • Don't be intimidating, and do not flirt with these types of guys, as they will get nervous and scared very quickly.
  • Make sure that your crush would treat you as nicely as you should be treated. If he wouldn't treat you that way, or he already treats you poorly, immediately look for another guy that will treat you the way you should be treated.
  • Learn to love yourself, and build up your confidence. Guys love confident girls, and they'll notice them!
    • If you're overconfident, and you don't treat anyone nicely, that isn't a good thing at all. It's good to be confident, but too much often turns into pride! Guys don't like arrogant girls - unless if they're arrogant themselves!
  • Remember that no one is perfect. Two imperfects can make a perfect.
  • If your crush is cruel and inappropriate, it isn't recommended that you try to win him over, as he will most likely treat you poorly.
  • Do not ever change completely just for a guy. Make sure he is worth it in the long run before you go chase after him, for you wouldn't want to find in the end that he is actually not your type at all.
  • Flirt a little bit once you get to know him enough, and he shows slight signs of being interested in you. However, if it seems that he is only interested in a friendship with you at this point, or he isn't interested at all, do 'not flirt, as it will ruin everything that you've worked for!
    • Hard to win, easy to lose. Sometimes, guys can be that way, so be very careful when flirting.
  • Most guys won't want to talk to you if they don't know you very well.
  • Don't complain to your crush about the people you're either in fights with or you hate. Guys dislike getting involved in cat fights.

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