Make People Fall in Love With You

Have you ever noticed some people seem to be just loved by everyone? While you can't "make" any person do anything, you can encourage or influence people, persuading them through your charm that you're worth the effort too! By doing simple things like smiling, asking for help, and being flexible, you can get lots of people to love you and to love spending time with you too.

Steps

Using Body Language

  1. Smile at people. Smiling is one of the most powerful ways to send a message to someone that you are friendly and loveable. The next time you meet someone new, just give them a big smile to show that you are friendly. You should receive a smile in return if the person is also friendly. Make sure that your smile is relaxed and natural, not forced or exaggerated, or your smile might not get the result you were hoping for.[1]
  2. Flash your eyebrows. An eyebrow flash is also an effective way to signal to someone that you are friendly. An eye brow flash is just a quick up and down of both of your eyebrows at the same time. It can be seen at a distance, so you can use it as your approach someone or from the other side of a large room.[1]
  3. Tilt your head to one side. Tilting your head slightly to one side also signals your friendliness, since it exposes your carotid artery. Your carotid artery is a highly vulnerable spot on your body, so we interpret a tilted head as sign that you are a friend that you see the other person as a friend too. Just don’t tilt our head too far to either side or it will look strange. A slight tilt is all you need.[1]
  4. Make eye contact. Eye contact can signal your trustworthiness to people, which makes it essential for getting people to love you. You don’t need to stare at people, but you do need to make good eye contact with people when you are talking and listening to them. It is okay to look away now and then, but make sure that you hold their gaze for as long as they hold yours.[2]

Talking to People

  1. Ask questions. People who who pretend to know everything are not as well liked as people who are willing to ask for help. Asking questions gives other people the opportunity to help you and that makes them feel good. If you are unsure of something or just want to know what someone else thinks, ask questions to give them a chance to share their knowledge.[3]
    • Try to get people talking about themselves. Research has shown that when people talk about themselves, they feel the same pleasure as when they eat or receive money.[4]
  2. Listen well. Active listening is a great way to get people to love you. The better you are at listening to people when they are talking, the more they will want to spend time talking with you. Practice active listening by nodding, using neutral phrases, and rephrasing what the speaker has just said.[1]
    • Demonstrate that you are listening by nodding your head and using neutral phrases, such as “Uh-huh,” “I see,” and “Yes.”
    • Demonstrate comprehension by rephrasing what the person just said. For example, if a friend says, “I have been so busy this week,” you can say, “So you haven’t had any time for yourself lately.”
  3. Joke around with people. Using humor is a great way to get people to love you too. If you know a good joke, share it with people. If you are witty, make witty remarks. Just make sure that the humor you sue is appropriate for the situation or you may end up offending someone. Look for little ways to make your companions laugh and they will love spending time with you.[3]
  4. Ask for help when you need it. People who are willing to ask for help when they need it are often interpreted as more likeable than people who pretend like they know everything. Show that you are open to other people’s advice and suggestions by asking for help when you need it. Allowing people opportunities to share their expertise with you will make them feel good and love being around you because of how useful you make them feel.[3][4]
  5. Say nice things about other people. You can also use positive gossip in your favor to get people to love you. Instead of talking about what you don’t like about people, talk about what you do like about them. This will show others that you have a good opinion of others and that you might even be saying positive things about them as well.[4]

Using Your Personality

  1. Maintain a positive attitude. People who have a positive outlook tend to be happier in general and they also have better social lives.[5] If you are always complaining and being pessimistic, people will not want to spend much time with you. Instead, try to be positive and optimistic so that people will feel happier when they are with you. Focus on good things to discuss and steer clear of negative or depressing subjects.
  2. Be flexible and easygoing. People who are easy to please are easier to love. Having a laid back attitude and being willing to go with the flow opens up possibilities for the people you spend time with. For example, if you are flexible and easygoing, you will be more willing to try a new restaurant or try a new activity. Try to adopt an open, laid back attitude to make people love spending time with you.[3]
    • Try asking what your friends want to do sometime and do whatever they want for the day.
  3. Show that you care. Demonstrating to others that you are a caring person will make them love you even more. Talk about your passions, be considerate of your friends’ needs and feelings, and be kind to strangers. The more that people see you as a caring person, the more they will want to spend time with you and grow to love you.[3]
    • Always ask your friends how they are doing and show genuine interest in their response. Offer your support if they are having a bad day or in need of encouragement.
  4. Help people without expecting a favor in return. To make people love you, it is important to help when people need you. But sometimes we help others with the expectations that they will return the favor sometime. Demonstrate your willingness to help without expecting a return favor. Let them know that you are just happy that you can help and that you are there for them any time. Showing that you are selfless will make it even easier for people to love you.[3]

Tips

  • Find ways to relate to all sorts of people. Even if you don't feel that you wouldn't want to be friends with a person, give that person respect and at least listen. You do not have to agree, just be polite.
  • Keep in mind that some people are hard to win over and may never warm up to you. Don’t take it personal if someone is cold or rude to you. Just keep being positive and they might start to lighten up.

Warnings

  • Don't change your personality just to fit in. Make adjustments that enhance the best in you.

Related Articles

  • Know the Best Places to Make Friends
  • Be Friends with People from Other Social Groups
  • Meet People in a Gym
  • Befriend Foreigners
  • Fall in Love With a Nice Person

Sources and Citations

  1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/let-their-words-do-the-talking/201107/get-anyone-you-instantly-guaranteed
  2. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sideways-view/201412/the-secrets-eye-contact-revealed
  3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 3.2 3.3 3.4 3.5 http://time.com/135945/make-people-like-you/
  4. ↑ 4.0 4.1 4.2 http://theweek.com/articles/455043/how-make-people-like-6-sciencebased-conversation-hacks
  5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-good-life/200805/what-is-positive-psychology-and-what-is-it-not
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