Snog a Boy

You’ve had your eyes on that one boy for quite some time. He’s been friendly enough – perhaps more than friendly – and you’re ready to take it to the next level. You’ve often imagined kissing him in the style of your favorite Hollywood hit or bestselling novel and are ready to take the leap. However, you’re not quite sure what to do. After all, you’ve never kissed this boy and are unsure how to send the right signals. Look no further!

Steps

Preparing for the Kiss

  1. Become confident in yourself. Confidence shows a boy you’re fully committed to engaging with him physically. Boys can be lazy, so showing a certain amount of confidence and effort can go a long way in improving the quality of a kiss. You may not realize it, but you have a lot to offer that particular boy you’re aiming to kiss, no matter how awesome or cute he is.
    • Appreciate all your qualities, not only your looks. This can range from your vocabulary and social skills to your passions and hobbies. If you feel confident on one particular aspect of yourself more than others, use that as a starting point and expand.[1]
  2. Dress to impress. A great way to inspire and maintain confidence is to wear an outfit you’re more than proud of. Pick out a top and bottom you think you could wear anywhere, whether that be a fancy restaurant or over to a friend’s house.
    • It’s easy to dress to the point that it appears as if you’re trying too hard. Don’t dress in your Sunday best or Prom ready, but wear an outfit you’re sure will grab his attention. Boys rarely dissect what women wear, they only know if they like it or not.
  3. Style your hair in an interesting way. Style your hair in a way that makes you feel confident. Maybe you like to frame your face with bangs? Maybe you feel the most confident with straightened hair? Pick the one you feel the most confident in.
    • Like clothes, guys will rarely nitpick your hair and notice small imperfections. They’ll only know that it looks good or bad, so a little effort goes a long way.
  4. Highlight your lips. Rock a luscious lip balm, lip-gloss or lipstick to make sure he notices how kissable your lips are. Pick a color that suits your skin tone and clothing selection. Maybe a deep, full red helps brighten your eyes or a light pink really suits the top you’ve picked out. Again, make a selection you're confident in.
    • These cosmetics will also help smooth – or at least bring attention to – any sort of chapped portions of your lips. The last thing you want to do is be ready to go in for the kiss and notice how rough and cracked they are.
  5. Smell nice. Freshen up your perfume and breath before you intend to meet your potential kissing mate. Smelling nice – both in and out of your mouth – goes a long way in creating an inviting, welcoming persona. One of the most memorable features in people is their specific aroma – make sure yours is a good one.[2]
    • There’s a chance your boy will not take this into consideration when it comes to breath. It’s always helpful to pack some gum or mints before meeting up with your new kissing mate. If needed, you can have one and even offer one to the boy you intend on kissing.

Creating a Kissing Environment

  1. Flirt your way into his heart. Nothing says you’re interested like a little flirtation. If you’re confident, interesting, look the part and have created a welcoming moment, flirting can even open the possibility of your boy going for the kiss himself.
    • Smile. Nothing creates a friendly persona like a smile. A smile indicates you’re happy and interested to be talking. Boys need all the positive reinforcement they can get, so a smile can go a long way. A smile will also subtly draw his attention to your mouth, something he’ll hopefully become intimate with! [3]
    • Make light contact. Subtly touching your boy will drop an even larger hint that you’re interested. Lightly touch his arm, shoulder, hand, or chest during conversation or even lightly, “accidentally” bump into him while walking. Even minimal contact will draw his attention and let him know you’re flirting. Plus, when you’re ready to move in for the kiss, the touching “barrier” between the two of you will already be broken.
    • Pay him compliments. Guys, like girls, need all the positive reinforcement they can get. Complimenting features you find attractive or beautiful, be it his hair, personality, sense of humor, eyes, muscles, or intelligence, can go a long way in letting him know you want to take things to the next level. [4]
  2. Create an opportunity to be alone. Ask your boy out on a date or a group date. If you don’t think he’ll go for that, meet up with him while he’s with his friends or while you’re with your friends. You can also suggest meeting up at a party. In any case, it’s important to eliminate as many spectators as possible to create a more intimate, “kiss worthy” moment.
    • Make it easy for him to get you alone. Try not to include your friends if you’re meeting up. Guys are often leery about making contact with a girl when her friends surround her, as they often do not share the same opinion about a particular boy. Remember, guys need as much positive reinforcement as possible. Girls can often serve as static to this situation, one you’d prefer to be crystal clear.
    • Suggest the two of you go for a walk together. There’s nothing like spending some time outside, be it outside of a party or just enjoying the day. A walk provides the perfect opportunity to create a kissing environment and utilize your flirting abilities.
    • Offer to help with tedious chores or errands. If your boy is buying groceries, grabbing a cup of coffee, cleaning or paying bills, offer to be his copilot. This situation will not only demonstrate interest, but offer a perfect chance to be alone.
  3. Keep open and positive body language. Make sure your body language is open, welcoming and reinforcing. How you carry yourself will send either the right or wrong signals to your kissing mate. Make sure your shoulders are facing him if sitting next to him, that you’re visibly interested in what he’s talking about (smiling and nodding are good for this), and that you’re maintaining light contact.[5]
    • Avoid crossing your arms, tightly crossing your legs, twiddling your thumbs, or constantly clasping your hands together. These indicate you could be bored with the conversation, anxious to leave, or that you’re generally not enjoying yourself. This is the last thing you want to do when you’re trying to kiss a boy. [6]
    • Don’t be afraid to show how nervous you are. A healthy bit of nervousness can show your boy how excited you are to be around him. The most obvious signs can act as positive reinforcement and physically articulate how much you like him and are enjoying yourself.
  4. Be patient. Do not force the situation, especially if you’re not sure if your boy is ready to be kissed. When the time is right, chances are he’ll be doing the exact same things you are to ensure a kiss will happen.
    • Be prepared to create more opportunities to be alone. Your first get-together with your potential kissing mate may not go as planned. Do not be discouraged – your boy may need more obvious hints or efforts to fully comprehend what’s going on. Remember to stay confident and patient.

Kissing Your Boy

  1. Maintain eye contact. It’s important that you lock eyes with your intended kissing mate. Not only does eye contact create an intimate moment, it can also drop the hint that you’re ready to do more than talk.
    • Locking eyes can create that particular romantic moment you’re looking for with your boy. Such a moment can break the barrier and change a meet up from casual to ideal for kissing. [7]
  2. Get close. Find a reason or excuse to be close to your boy. If you’re out walking, say you’re cold. If you’re sitting somewhere, use the same excuse! When you’re sure the moment is right, find any excuse to be close to your boy’s lips.
    • Being close to your boy can serve as an indication of how interested or ready to kiss he is. Be prepared to maintain your patience if you don’t get the reaction you desire. He may need a bit more time.
  3. Break the kiss barrier. If you’re unsure whether or not your boy is ready to fully smooch, break the kiss barrier with a kiss on the cheek. The way your boy reacts may indicate whether or not he’s ready to kiss you, be it later on in the night or the next time you see him.
    • Make sure he knows it’s not just a friendly kiss. Instead of simply pecking him on the cheek, linger a bit during the kiss. Make sure your lips feel soft against a good spot on his cheek. It’s important that even this kiss is memorable, so do it somewhere close to his ear or near his mouth.
  4. Go for the kiss. After you’re close and have maintained eye contact, your boy should get the hint that you’re ready for a full-on smooch. Make sure your lips are light and soft, welcoming him to take the lead if needed. Line up your nose with his nose and turn slightly to the right or left to avoid collision. In any case, a light kiss will be much more welcoming and enjoyable to your boy over a hard, deep kiss. [8]
    • A good technique to use is to lean in, and right before your lips meet his, hold off a bit. This will create a sense of longing in your boy and allow him to close the gap. This way, you’ll know for sure that the situation is mutual.
    • If you make your lips into a tight pucker, you may send the wrong signal. This may indicate you were not ready for a full kiss or that you’re generally not enjoying it and uncomfortable with what’s happening.
  5. Reinforce the situation with your hands. You can put your hands to great use and indicate – and even increase – the level of enjoyment by letting your hands roam. Run your hands along the back of his head, lightly caress his neck, or even let your fingers run through his hair during the kiss.
    • Your hands can also pull your boy in closer to heighten the level of the kiss and make it easier to maneuver around each other’s faces.
    • Make sure you’re not too rough or forward when caressing his neck, back or hair, as it may send the wrong signal. Remember, you’re just at the kissing stage with your boy. Other sorts of affections will come later and when you're ready.
  6. Change it up. After you’ve initiated the first kiss, you can also add more variety to the situation by changing the way you kiss. You can begin by lightly changing the intensity and speed in which you’re kissing. The trick is to keep the kissing interesting and enjoyable rather than long and tedious.
    • You can significantly up your kissing game by lightly sucking on your boys lower lip. If he likes it, chances are he’ll return the favor. This technique can heighten the experience for the both of you and make the situation that much more memorable. Remember, never make it too intense, as you don’t want to make the situation memorable in an awkward way.
  7. Initiate a French kiss. Nothing makes a kiss more memorable than transforming it to a French kiss. A French kiss is reminiscent of all those black and white Hollywood hits and has really become the standard when it comes to romance.
    • To French kiss, you open your mouth slightly – only enough to ease your tongue through – before lightly touching his lips with it. Don’t let your tongue linger for too long.
    • If your boy returns the gesture, he’s ready to French kiss. The rest of the kiss involves turning your head slightly to the side to avoid nose and teeth collision.
    • Move your tongue into his mouth and lightly caress his tongue with yours. Chances are, he’ll be doing the same thing. Remember to keep your tongue moving, otherwise it will simply be resting inside his mouth!
    • Be sure to change the pace and intensity while French kissing. Like a normal kiss, the moment can quickly move from passionate and romantic to boring and tedious if kept too routine.
  8. End the kiss before it becomes boring. Make sure you leave your boy wanting more. If you’ve utilized your hands, tried a few kissing techniques, and let the kiss linger, chances are it was a fun and enjoyable experience. If your boy enjoyed it, he’ll want to do it again and soon. Let him wonder when the next encounter will be!

Tips

  • Remember to smile. Nothing lets a boy know you’re happy to be around them than a smile.
  • Do not go any further than you want to. Make sure your boy knows you set the pace and what you’re comfortable with.
  • Be delicate. Avoid eating a boy’s face up and keep things light. Only up your intensity and pace when you’re sure he’s ready.
  • Avoid bringing friends into the mix. Friends can only make the situation more awkward than it needs to be. Remember, this is between you and the boy, not you, the boy and a group of your closest pals.
  • Don't push your boy if he's not ready. If they don't want to do it, bring your talents elsewhere.
  • Don't act too nervous or it could make the whole thing way too tense!
  • When he puts pressure on your lips try to match it with your pressure that you are kissing him with then it shouldn't be awkward. Good luck.

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Sources and Citations

  1. ↑ http://www.forbes.com/sites/margiewarrell/2015/02/26/build-self-confidence-5strategies/
  2. ↑ http://www.askmen.com/scent/scent_300/313_the-science-behind-scent-attraction.html
  3. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sideways-view/201410/the-surprising-psychology-smiling
  4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200403/the-art-the-compliment
  5. ↑ http://www.scienceofpeople.com/2013/07/body-language-of-attraction/
  6. ↑ https://blog.bufferapp.com/improve-my-body-language-secrets
  7. ↑ http://www.livescience.com/4299-eyes-alluring.html
  8. ↑ http://www.scilogs.com/nerdy-mind/prelude-to-a-kiss-the-science-of-kissing/
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