Tell Someone You Won't Go to Prom with Them
Prom. It's a nerve-wracking time for everyone, especially when it's time to ask people out. And, unfortunately, some people get rejected. If you find yourself needing to turn down someone's promposal, this is the article for you.
Contents
Steps
- Respond to the person's promposal. When you're asked to the prom by somebody, whether it's public or private, they're understandably nervous and don't want to be left hanging. Give the person a response - don't just walk away stunned or disgusted! You can just tell them "No", or if you're unsure about going to prom with that person, tell them, "I have to think about it" or "Maybe". Be aware, though, that if you tell them no, they may want an explanation, and "I don't know" would upset them; in this case, it's better to say "Let me think about it".
- Understand why you don't want to go to prom with this person. There are many reasons you wouldn't want to go to prom with someone, but knowing why can help you to explain why you don't want to go with them. Some reasons for not going to prom with someone may be:
- You've already agreed to go with someone else.
- You're not going to prom.
- The person asking you has treated you poorly in the past.
- You're not interested in the person who asked you.
- You're going to prom alone or with friends, not a date.
- Find the person who asked you. Once you're sure of the reason you don't want to go to prom with this person, find them and tell them that you want to talk about their promposal.
- Don't do this in front of a bunch of this person's friends. They might get the wrong idea, making for an awkward situation later.
- Politely reject them. Explain to the person nicely that you won't go with them. For example: "I really appreciate that you asked me to the prom, and I know it took a lot of courage to do that, but the thing is, I'm not going to prom with a date. I'm just going with friends, and I'm not interested in going with a date. I hope you understand."
- Don't be rude when telling them. They were most likely extremely nervous to ask you, and being rude to them rather than letting them down gently will probably make them feel even worse. If you simply don't like the person and don't want to go with them, say to them, "I don't think we're a good match for prom. I feel like if we went together, it would be uncomfortable for us, and I don't think either of us wants to be uncomfortable at prom."
- Additionally, don't lie to the person. If you just don't want to go with this certain person, don't say to them that you're not going to prom or that you don't want to go with a date. They'll almost definitely spot you at prom - with your date.
- If the person who asked you isn't someone you think of romantically, make sure that they clearly understand that you do not have romantic feelings towards them. You don't want to cause a potentially awkward situation by making this person think that you do like them but just don't want to go to prom with them!
- Don't be rude when telling them. They were most likely extremely nervous to ask you, and being rude to them rather than letting them down gently will probably make them feel even worse. If you simply don't like the person and don't want to go with them, say to them, "I don't think we're a good match for prom. I feel like if we went together, it would be uncomfortable for us, and I don't think either of us wants to be uncomfortable at prom."
- Wait for the reaction. Everybody will react to a rejection differently. Some people might get embarrassed and respond with "okay, sorry I asked", while others might get visibly upset. Be prepared for this person's reaction.
- If the person starts to cry, feel free to apologize to them, but don't agree to go to prom with them just because they're crying. You made the decision to not go with them; backing out of that decision will just make you seem unreliable and a target for manipulation.
- Don't ever let someone threaten you into going to prom with them. If somebody threatens to hurt you in any way because you won't go to prom with them or tells you something like "You won't have any friends after this", stick to your answer and go to a trusted administrator or law enforcement, depending on how severe the threat was. You should never feel obligated to go anywhere with someone just to keep yourself safe.
Tips
- Try to be nice to them, it takes a lot of courage to ask someone to prom.
- Make sure you're nice when you reject the person.
- Don't leave them waiting too long when rejecting them; the sooner they're told, the less it's going to hurt.
Warnings
- Don't lie to someone when rejecting them.
