Attract Friends

Being a friend can be a game of chance. You can make friends naturally in some cases, and it can be a constant work in progress in others. Using the "Do unto others..." model, you can always tilt the odds in your favor.

Steps

  1. Be a friend. There is an old saying that holds true even through today's troubled times: "If you want a friend, be a friend."
  2. Be yourself. Everyone is unique, so dress how you want to. Avoid the peer pressure, cookie-cutter personality profile. Don't try to fit in, be proud of your individuality. Then, go out and do things with people you meet, whether they be existing or new friends, and go and enjoy yourself. Be noticed for being yourself.
  3. Be respectful, smile, and do something that will get you noticed. Help others out if they need it.
  4. Be nice to others and to Be a Good Friend to the New Kid, to people you meet. If you are in school and are working with someone that is unpopular, be nice and listen to what they want to say.
  5. Be modest. No one likes a show-off, especially if they do it all the time. If you want to brag about something, don't prolong it, and do it tastefully.
  6. Be Outgoing. There's nothing wrong with being shy. But lighten up a little. It'll be hard to attract friends if you're anti-social. Talk to new people. Meet the new kid in school. Introduce yourself to the person who sits behind you in math class. More people will want to be around you.
  7. Smile and watch your relationships grow. The qualities and character you build from doing the above will shine through, and people will love someone that will smile during the hardest of times. Try not to frown, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile!
  8. Follow the basics of common courtesy. Learn to listen. Be a friend. Don't gossip. When you're given a confidence, keep it. Be responsible. Own your actions. Keep your values. They are the only things you truly ever have. When you lose them, you lose everything.
  9. If people don't like you or don't accept you, just remember that no one is perfect. Not everyone will like you. A lot of people will act like they don't like you because they are afraid of what others will say. They are insecure. Deep down, they may not like you, but they respect you.
  10. Learn how to understand how others feel. If you don't, you won't be able to interact with your new friend that well.

Tips

  • When you talk to someone, listen. Don't talk about only yourself. Ask them about them a lot and act interested in getting to know them. Don't worry, after you talk to them a bit I'm sure they'll start asking you more questions so you'll have time to talk about yourself as well.
  • Always try to help the people around you.
  • Complimenting people is always helpful. People will warm up to you more if they think that you appreciate something about them. Everyone feels better after being complimented. Try to be honest, though. Nobody likes a suck up.
  • If you like a sport, join a team; there will be many people who like the same sport as you, so there's some common ground to build on.
  • If you're looking for an unpopular friend, then DO NOT hang out with the popular group. Then they will just think you want to be popular. Instead, hang around the friend you are looking for.
  • It may sound strange, but wearing bright colours may help you to get noticed; as it says above: everyone is unique, so dress how you want to; don't try to fit in, and be proud of your individuality.
  • Don't rush it, or else they may just think you are weird.
  • Don't show off too much.

Warnings

  • Don't dominate the time or space of others.
  • Don't be a show-off.
  • On the other hand, sometimes it can be easier to make a deep friendship with someone who is outwardly quite different, but shares the same ethics and values as you. In these cases, the outward diversity simply makes life more interesting.
  • Try not to mix multiple groups that are radically different; the atmosphere may be a bit tense and it may prove difficult to develop meaningful friendships.
  • If you notice there is something you do, or something about you that makes others nervous, it is probably best to stop. Individuality is great and all, but there is no need to make a tense atmosphere.

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