Be Friends with Guys
So you want to become buddies or "one-of-the-guys," but you have a shy reputation? You can instantly increase your guy popularity! After all, there's absolutely no reason for you to limit your friends to only one sex. Making friends with guys can take time and effort (as it would with anybody), but will prove to be very rewarding.
Contents
Steps
- Start smiling! You gotta seem approachable to the guys. This also includes self confidence.
- Sit next to them. This way they'll be more likely to start talking to you first, but try not to be too close. You don't want to look like a stalker. Make excuses every now and then to be near him.
- Strike up a conversation. If there is a particular guy you like and you know he loves something, sports for example, watch the game on TV, or if he's a musician, look up a great song on iTunes to share with him. After knowing it, simply investigate it in your own so that while conversation already starts you will not feel puzzled of what the topic is all about.
- If they tease you, laugh along with them, or play it up with sarcasm. You can pretend to be mad at them, this can come off as "sibling-ly" conflict. Guys like it when a girl has a sense of humor.
- If you become close enough to share an inside joke, repeat it a few times, just to make sure they know you remember it and that you find your conversations important.
- Make sure when you are around the guys, show your great personality and don't seem shy, guys have interest in girls that seem fun and crazy.
- If they strike up a conversation with you, don't get scared, because guys usually won't put you on the spot or make you uncomfortable.
- Go ahead and ask them questions about school or how they are doing, and so on.
- Don't seem too desperate to get their attention, some guys may feel that you're too interested to them and they might take you for granted for that.
- Be talkative. If guys see you talking they'll start to think you are fun to be around and they even might talk to you.
- If the guy you are talking to has his friends around, it is a great opportunity to introduce yourself and start making more guy friends.
Tips
- Be friends with more than one guy so that you can be more comfortable.
- Don't hang out with them 24/7 because the boys will feel like you're stalking them and they will feel uncomfortable.
- Relax! Guys are people too, and he probably likes you just as much as you like him. Its super-important to be yourself, because the right kind of guys love/like (whatever) you for who you are, both inside and outside.
- Try being honest; guys like being fair and usually appreciate honesty and directness. Don't be unkind but do be straightforward. They appreciate a brave person.
- Make an effort to get to know him. Being into "guy stuff" is great, but when you know what he actually likes, it's so much better.
- This works great with creating first impressions, unless you don't know anything about "guy stuff." Coming across as someone who's just pretending to like sports to get to a guy does not make a good first impression. There's no point in becoming friends with a guy if he's just becoming friends with a mask. Also be aware that some guys aren't into what you see as "guy stuff", such as sports and heavy metal.
- Be careful about hanging out with them too much, as they are generally a lot rougher then girls. Some people are okay with that, but if you're a girly girl, don't go over the top because all guys need a bit of boy-time.
Warnings
- Draw a line between friendships and relationships. Minimize sexual tension and avoid going overboard with flirting.
- Don't ignore your girl friends just to talk to the guys.
- Don't get a huge ego if your guy friends are around you a lot and start thinking all of them like you.
- Don't think that just because you are friends with a guy you have to be like a guy, it's okay to be girly if you are friends with guys.
- You should also remember that even though they are guys, they are supposed to be friends too, so if he's a jerk just don't be his friend, you aren't obligated!
- Many guys are jerks. If he's doing something that makes you uncomfortable, don't write it off as "boys will be boys." It's not just your job to make him like you, he should also be putting effort into getting you to like him. Again, if you don't like something that he's doing, talk to him about it or drop the friendship completely.
- Do this at a gradual pace if you're known for being painfully quiet and shy. You'll just be overwhelming if you do everything at once.
- Don't go overboard with becoming one of the guys.
- Never talk too much like a guy and don't always involve yourself in his conversation, he might find it irritating.
- Do not talk to guys about girl problems or girl stuff, it might gross them out or freak them out.
