Overcome Shyness in High School

You're the person who almost nobody knows and always shrinks in the back of the class when the teacher is about to call on you; you can change that. Get ready to become the confident person who makes tons of friends, oozes with personality, and begs to be called on in class!

Steps

  1. You'll need Build Confidence Through Projection When people see that you're happy about life and about yourself, they admire and look up to you and want to be around you. So first off, forget about your looks. Never base your self-confidence on looks. What if one day you wake up with a big giant zit on your nose? You will feel ugly. Rather, think about your best bodily features: your arms, legs, feet, eyes, lips, ears, whatever, and learn to accentuate them (without showing too much). Anything you're insecure about? That's only because society thinks it's bad. You will embrace your faults as "quirks" and carry them off with confidence.
    • Think about your strengths. Do you have great grades, teachers love you, you play a sport well, or an instrument? Work on that and constantly remind yourself about your strengths. Try new things like an Do Well in Art Class, driving a stick shift, or Begin Babysitting, and you'll find some more things you're good at!
  2. Now that you're confident, so smile! When you smile at people, it shows that you're outgoing, friendly, happy, and a great person. And that's what you want to be known as, right? So show those pearly whites! Brush your teeth too; it improves the look of your smile and you are not as subconscious to show it.
    • If you don't smile because you're ashamed of your teeth, get whitening strips, braces, a Take Care of Your Retainer--anything that will make you feel better about yourself.
  3. You smiled at someone and they smiled back. What next? Introduce yourself! Don't forget that person's name! Lodge it in your memory as soon as they say it.
    • Next time you see them, in class, or lunch, or a football game, go over and say "hi." Sit next to them if they invite you to; one of their friends could be your new best friend!
    • Be interested. Ask the person questions about themselves, like what grade they're in, where they were born, hobbies, favorite TV shows, movies, etc. If you show people you are interested in them, they'll feel valued and important, and they'll definitely say hi to you in the hall. If you don't know what to say when starting a conversation, brush up on current events! MTV News, CNN, or whatever, just as long as it's interesting. Also read blogs, magazines, books, and watch TV to get conversation starters.
  4. Stop thinking others are judging you, and everything you do. For shy people, that's hard. You might think that people are judging you on how you look, how wrong you're doing something, and may feel like the whole world is Simon Cowell from American Idol. It's not true! People are dealing with their own insecurities and battles, and if you reach out to them and stop focusing on how you look, people will like you and treat you like a friend.
  5. Get out more. Stop lounging in front of the TV or computer and get out of the house! Get involved in clubs, sports, and volunteer. You'll meet people with the same interests as you, and that's all you need to make a friend! Remember, a stranger is a friend you haven't met yet.
  6. Compliment! Complimenting is an awesome way to start a conversation and make people like you. So if you see a girl or guy with great hair, shoes or a cool outfit, speak up! You'll be known as a nice person, and they'll eventually return the favor.
  7. Have courage! Remember, there's someone wonderful inside of you that's crawling to come out. All you need is courage. If you want to raise your hand in class to ask a question, go for it! Remember: the only stupid question is the one not asked! If you want to sit with a group that you admire or a girl that seems interesting, go for it. People are just as friendly as you are. If they reject you, then there's something wrong with the person, not you.
  8. Remember that you do have a place in this world, because your birth certificate says so. All men and women are created equal, and are entitled to equal rights. You cannot let these louder people crowd you out. You have to notice yourself, then people will notice you.

Tips

  • Stop thinking that people are better than you because of looks, clothes, money, etc. They are not. Period.
  • Let go of the assumption you're incapable of being social, or not socially acceptable. It is absolutely not true, it will take time, but you are able to be confident and be yourself.
  • Don't let other people push you around and change you because you're shy. Stay true to yourself; you'll find your niche someday.
  • It will be hard to do this for shy people, But remember that people want friends just as much as you do. They want to feel important. So if you can do that, just smile, ask questions, compliment, walk each other to class, they'll be your friend.

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