Talk Your Mom into Saying Yes
Do you want to go to a party or hang out with friends, but your mom keeps saying you can't? Don't give up yet! If you stay cool and follow these steps, your mom will be saying "Yes" before you know it.
Contents
Steps
Show Her You're Trustworthy
- Be honest about your plan. A mom's worst fear is that you'll get hurt - that's the main reason moms tend to say "no" when you want to do something. But if you want to turn your mom's fear on its head, all you have to do is tell her all about your big plan and convince her she has nothing to worry about. Give her details about how safe it is and show her how you've already worked out all the details. Once she sees it isn't really risky, she'll probably say yes!
- Always know what you are talking about. If, for example, it's a movie, then you should know the rating of the movie (M, MA, MA15+/ U, PG, 12, 15, 18 etc). If you're underage and you're seeing a more mature movie, don't mention the movie unless they ask. Just mention the type of movie, like comedy or thriller.
- Be enthusiastic about what you want. Tell her how what you want to do is going to really improve your life. If you want to go to a concert, you'll gain valuable life experience. If you want to be allowed to stay up late, tell her how you'll use that time to do something productive. If you want more time with your friends, tell her that your social life needs a boost. If you want a new pair of shoes, show her how shabby your old ones have gotten.
- Don't lie about what you're doing. It might work the first time around, but when your mom finds out you lied she's going to say "no" next time. You don't always have to tell the whole truth - you can leave out details that no moms need to know - but blatantly lying? Next time you want something, might as well not even bother asking!
- Assure her you'll be home on time. How you will reach home is going to be key.Tell her your plan for getting home and give her an exact time you'll be there. Remind her of other times you came home right on time without any problems.
- Have a plan in place for anything that could go wrong. Moms love seeing their kids plan ahead. Think through what could happen and tell her you've already got it covered. For example, if your friend leaves without you, have a different plan for getting home.
- Bring up times when you Be Trustworthy. If you've already done things to earn your mom's trust, remind her.Talk about how well you've been doing in school, how much you've been helping around the house, how you always reach home on time and don't complain too much about the chores you have to do. If you've broken her trust, work to earn it back by doing what your mom tells you for at least a week before you ask her for something.
- Remind her that you only live once. Say "Mom, remember that concert you went to that has changed your life? You were my age that year."Talk up the fact that youth is fleeting and you'll only get so many chances to have fun before you grow up and leave the house. She'll start feeling emotional and nostalgic, which will likely lead to a "yes" before you know it.
Show Her You Deserve It
- Do well in school. If you always do your homework and get decent grades, what's your mom's excuse for saying no? Exactly, she doesn't have one. Do your best in school and in your extracurricular activities so that your mom sees how much you deserve the treat you want.
- Do Quick Chores Your Parents Will Appreciate. Take a bit off the load off your mom by helping her clean the house, do the dishes, mow the lawn, walk the dog, and all the other little things she does to keep the house running. If you're asking for something big, doing some extra chores doesn't hurt. Go above and beyond a few weeks before you pop the question.
- Get home on time. Being reliable is the key. If you deceive your mom and you're always late, she's not likely to give in when you want something. Do your best to get home when you say you will and be reliable in other ways. If you say you'll have your room clean by Saturday, have it done. If you say you'll feed the cat, do it without needing to be asked a second time. Your mom will notice how reliable you've been.
- Cook a meal or bake a cake. Your mom will absolutely love it if you surprise her by taking over the kitchen and cooking something for her and the family. Get up early and cook some scrambled eggs and pancakes for breakfast, or use your free afternoon to bake up a cake or some cookies for everyone. It sounds weird but it really works.Just make sure you clean up afterward.
- Be extremely nice. Ask her about her day. She probably asks you about yours, so why not reverse it and see what happens? Your mom will be touched, and more likely to say yes. Take it to the next level by telling her about how things are going in your life and letting her in on what you've been thinking about. You will be shocked at how much more likely she'll be to let you start making more decisions on your own.
Show Her You're Mature
- Earn money to pay for what you want. If you want to go to a movie or you'd like a new game or toy, offer to do some chores around the house in exchange for the money you need to pay for it. Your mom might be so impressed at the offer that she'll go ahead and say yes.
- Compromise if you need to. Say you really wanted to go to a party, but your mom is stubbornly saying no because she doesn't want you to be out that late. Why not offer to come home an hour earlier? If it goes well, maybe the next time she'll let you stay out as late as you want.
- Don't say "everyone else is doing it". Kids say this all the time, but does it ever really work? Moms don't care much about going along with the crowd. Only say this if you're asking for something that literally everyone else is getting to do, and have a list of people your mom respects who get to do it. Be ready to have your friends back you up if your mom says she wants to call them or their parents.
- Don't beg. It'll just make you seem immature, making your mom feel like she's making the right decision in saying "no". You've got to give her a good reason to say yes, and begging is just annoying. If you cannot get her to say "yes" in any way, a guilt trip might come to your rescue in the end. Use statements like "No, it's okay. Love you mom." and walk downstairs. Later she will come to tell you that you can go, because you just let it go like a mature person.
- Make her laugh. Lighten things up by telling a joke or teasing your mom to make her laugh. Even if you're upset she's saying no, saying something funny can turn things right around. It shows your mom that you realize it's not the end of the world, and you're not going to throw a tantrum like a little kid. Who knows, her enhanced mood might make her change her mind.
- Don't forget to say "I love you". It works like a charm to make moms feel happy. Don't let it sound fake - say it like you mean it, even if you're feeling mad. The power of these three words cannot be underestimated!
- If that doesn't work, ask your dad.
Tips
- Try to do everything they ask you to do.
- Understand that your mother might indeed know best; don't overreact if she says no to something you really shouldn't be doing.
- Spend as much time with her as possible.
- Tell her that she's all you've ever wanted in a mother and that she is nice, fair and kind.
- If your mom is a stickler for grades, take home really high grades even if they are just on quizzes. Make it look like it's a really big deal.
- Know to defend yourself in case you start off an argumentation.
- If all else fails, let it go. Do something else to take your mind off whatever you were going to do and don't ask again because they might just turn around and say yes,but be careful always think about it but not that bad.
- Always tell her what is your favorite thing about her is, she will know that you really care about her.
- Don't go too far. Otherwise, your mom and dad might lose some respect and trust, and they won't let you go anywhere. Be careful.
- Don't lie. It does not work because they will find out sooner or later.
- Show respect to your mother and she will most likely say yes.
- Always obey them then you'll earn it.
- Even if they say "no" to something, remind them your good grades from school or that you've been doing your chores every day.
- Don't keep nagging at her; she'll get mad and annoyed and will refuse to do what you want.
- Make sure you have manners and say thank you but as soon you are done don't be mean and just don't be nice when you want things, then they will know!
- Make sure she knows you are serious about what you are requesting.
- Don't keep asking after she has answered, help out around the house and do little favours and wait a few days until you ask again, but don't make it obvious you only did the helping out because you want something out of it.
- You could try asking your dad if your mother continues to say no, but this could potentially cause conflict between them and/or you.
- Show that you really want it.
- No matter how mad or upset you are, don't show your anger. It will only make your seem immature and give your mom another reason to say no.
- Remind her of a time when she promised she would do something nice for you and she forgot.
- Don't lie! While it seems like an easy escape, your mother will find out and not trust you anymore.
- Don't ask your father again after he says no. You may make both parents very upset and will not say yes.
- Do your chores and she might say yes because she feels guilty.
Warnings
- Never lie to her, you will lose her trust.
- Make sure she isn't in a bad mood before proceeding.
- Keep your promises to her.
- Never beg, especially in front of a friend, because a lot of parents call that "putting them on the spot".
- Don't get her into a fight or argument. It will only make it worse.
- Don't only be nice to her whenever you want something. Not only is this cruel, but after a while she'll start seeing it coming a mile away.
- Don't interrupt her, she will get mad.
- Agree to make a deal with her in exchange for permission.
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