Survive a Blind Date

Here's some useful information about how to have a successful blind date.

Steps

  1. Contact your date. Get the other person's e-mail address through your mutual friend. Contact the other person using a friendly tone. Don't ask for the phone number or make plans to meet right away. Exchange a few e-mails then politely ask if it would be okay for you to call to make plans to meet for a drink.
  2. Make plans. There are many ways of initiating relationships. There is no rule for who should make arrangements for when and where to go. In a heteronormative context, the man may choose two to three places to meet and ask the woman to choose among them, but it doesn't have to work this way. Regardless of your gender, you may like to make arrangements, or mutually discuss with the person who you're going on the date with about what you would both prefer.
  3. Prepare your date. Set a specific day and time you will meet. Dress well for your date. Prepare a few questions you might ask in case there's a blank in the conversation. Some of these questions might stem from the email conversations you've been having.
  4. Don't set your expectations too high. Remember, you don't know this person yet, and just because they agreed to go on a date with you doesn't mean they have to necessarily be the love of your life. Go to your date with the idea to have fun and get to know the other person, instead of testing whether they are a potential life partner. That way, you will probably feel more relaxed and conversation will be more fluid.
  5. Arrive five minutes early for your date. Reserve a place to sit and talk, and avoid looking bored while you're waiting for the other person to arrive. Read a book, talk on the phone, or look at the menu (if it's a dinner date).
  6. See how the date goes. Ask questions, but nothing too personal. Try to ask open-ended, engaging questions instead of one's which will just require a "yes" or "no" answer. Get to know them, smile and laugh a lot, and at least look like you're having fun, even if you're not.
  7. Make a decision to see them again. Don't mention anything about meeting again unless you really mean it. If there is really no attraction, then politely decline. Since there is a mutual friend involved, dragging something on could cause some problems.
  8. Plan an escape route. Plan for a friend to call you 45 minutes into the date. If its going terribly tell your date its an emergency and you have to go. If its going great just say you accidentally left something at your friends house and they were calling to see when you could get it. That way you don't have to sit through a terrible date.

Tips

  • Be yourself. If you're not that funny, don't try to be too funny. If you don't usually dress that trendy, don't dress trendy. The other person will be able to tell if you're uncomfortable in your own skin. And remember, this person is your friend's friend and might have already asked him about you: what if his first impression of you was completely different? Your date would probably be very confused.
  • Men: As in most dating situations, it is important for you to take initiative here. Women are generally attracted to men for this characteristic.
  • Watch the movie "Blind Date" with Bruce Willis and do the exact opposite of everything that happens on the date.
  • For your first meeting, go for a drink, not a full meal. This way, you're not bound by the time commitment of an entire meal. A drink can be quick if it doesn't go well, or can lead to more hanging out afterwards if it does go well.
  • Smile and make an effective use of body language. Remember: first impressions are important; you only get one chance to make a good first impression.
  • If you don't want to be set up, then don't complain or be rude to the person with whom you're being set up. If the connection is already made, just give it a try to make the most of it. If the connection has not been made yet, tell your friend to stop setting you up.

Warnings

  • Don't sound too desperate or too aloof during your preliminary communications. Being desperate is never good, and being aloof can come off as very rude.
  • Don't drink too much.
  • Whatever happens, it doesn't matter if the other person does so, don't criticize your mutual friend!
  • If the person you meet is rude, don't be rude back. As mentioned above, there is a third party (your mutual friend/friends) who will also be affected by your actions. Keep them in mind as well.

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