Date a Girl at Middle School when You're Overweight

Do you feel uncomfortable about asking girls out because you are overweight? You are missing out on having fun and meeting new friends by hanging back this way. Instead, here are some ways to help you overcome these feelings and stop worrying about your weight and start thinking about enjoying your life.

Steps

  1. Put aside your feelings about your weight. Use your weight to your advantage. Act confident and like you know you're overweight and don't care. A lot of of girls will feel that you offer protection. If you really like a girl, the important thing is for her to like you back. She is more likely to respond positively to you if you are a caring, vibrant and outgoing person who shows respect and interest in her. Girls respond to kindness, respect and displaying interest in their life and needs. She will be less likely to focus on your weight and see your wonderful personality if you do too.
  2. Spend time talking together. Try to get to know her first. Strike up a conversation over shared interests, such as books when in the library or nature when outdoors. After you have spent time talking together, start to compliment her in little ways here and there. She will notice and this will go beyond the matter of your size.
  3. Be well groomed. Brush your hair, take a daily shower using good smelling shampoo, conditioner, and body wash. Wear deodorant, and if you like, a little cologne. Brush, floss, and use mouth wash for oral hygiene. Clean your clothes, never wear them twice in a row.
  4. Pluck up the courage to ask. Think of a place that the two of you can go together where you will feel comfortable and that you think she will also like to go. Suggest going there together in a friendly, casual manner.
  5. Be persistent. If she says no, you are simply in dating land. Do not refocus on your weight. Instead, focus on the reality that dating is hard work! Your strength still remains in letting your potential girlfriend know what a great person you are by always being friendly, helpful and caring in your attitude toward her. And if you are naturally funny, share jokes and fun stories as well but don't force it and don't use humor to put yourself down - there is never any need to draw attention to your looks or weight in a derogatory manner.
  6. Keep calm. A calm, smooth and confident voice will always command attention, as will genuine eye contact. Focus on all the dating techniques - there are plenty on wikiHow.
  7. If you feel that you are unhappy with your appearance, see a doctor or a health professional and discuss your options. Join a gym or try to get hold of some home gym equipment and do some light weights and build up a regular cardiovascular exercise program. There are always ways to combat weight problems, they may take time and they may take a lot of effort but if you persevere you will get there.
  8. As for the girl you're pursuing...make sure you like her for the right reasons. If you only like her because she's "hot," it's probably not going to work out. You want a girl to see who you are as a person, so why not do the same for other girls?

Tips

  • If a girl says no because of the fact that you are overweight, don't sweat it. You never want to be with a girl who will only date a guy for looks.
  • Don't let it get in the way of your personality and make you insecure. Girls like a confident guy, despite any flaws.
  • Treat rejection as a learning experience. Assess your approach afterwards and ask yourself such questions as: Were you confident? Were you speaking smoothly or stammering? Were you looking away?
  • If you do have other issues about being overweight, such as health problems or psychological problems, see a health professional for assistance.
  • Consult a doctor before starting any exercise program.
  • Don't beg for a date! This could either make the girl feel bad for you and only go out with you because she pities you, or turn you down because she thinks you're whiny.

Warnings

  • Obsessing over your weight can make your middle school and high school experience miserable! Enjoy who you are and the time you have in school. It goes by way to fast to obsess over things like weight. If you truly feel like you need to lose weight, talk to your doctor or a parent/guardian. They can help you.
  • Don't ask you to obsess over your weight in front of her; if you are on a diet or planning to lose weight, these are good things to clarify with her when eating out etc. but they are not draw cards to woo with.
  • Don't expect immediate results, it takes time.
  • Don't get too cocky; it is off-putting. You want to appear confident, but not too confident.

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