Make a Man Fall in Love with You

While you can’t really “make” someone fall in love with you, it is possible to encourage someone to feel a certain way about you. Read this wikiHow for some advice on making a man fall in love with you.

10 Second Summary

  • Show that you care about your appearance and health. More ↓
  • Smile often and make eye contact. ↓
  • Demonstrate your independence.↓
  • Be kind and considerate. ↓
  • Show him what makes you special. ↓
  • Be a positive force in his life and make him feel needed. ↓

Steps

Attracting Him

  1. Show that you care about your appearance and health. By putting time and energy into your physical appearance, you will demonstrate to your man that you value your looks and good health. You will also feel more confident about yourself if you feel healthy and strong, and confidence is always attractive.[1]
    • Stay active by going to the gym regularly. Don't skip your workout to spend time with him. Invite him to join you or take a rain check.
    • Keep your hair clean and styled neatly, and pay close attention to your personal hygiene.
    • Put on a little signature scent in the morning or before you go out, or wear scented body lotion for a subtler scent.
    • If you wear makeup, aim for a look that's flattering but simple; don't try to overdo this aspect.
    • Brush your teeth twice daily, floss, and use mouthwash. During the day, use mints or gum to freshen your breath.
    • Do your laundry regularly. Instead of buying a new wardrobe, make the best of what you have. Set up a regular schedule and make sure you always have clean shirts, pants/skirts, undergarments and socks available. Don't let him see stains or unkempt clothing!
  2. Smile well and often. Your best weapon is always available, completely free, and can't be overused—your winning smile! Flash a genuine grin as often as possible, whether it's directed at your guy or not. It makes you look approachable, and it might actually make you happier.[2][3]
    • Find something to smile about. If you're a bit blue, think of a happy moment or amusing joke to spark a smile. Do you have a favorite pet? A favorite memory? Whatever it is, think of it as often as you need to.
    • Try a slow smile. If you've made eye contact with the man you love, smile at him slowly, letting it spread over your face. If you tend to blush and look down when he's looking at you, let it happen after the smile — you'll be irresistible.
  3. Make frequent eye contact. Making eye contact is a crucial component of flirtation and it can also increase his feelings of attraction for you. Gaze into his eyes when he is talking to you and don’t be afraid to lock eyes with him even if you are both silent.[4]
    • If you are too nervous to gaze into his eyes or you don't think it is appropriate yet, use quick glances to make frequent eye contact with him. By looking at him for a moment and then looking away, you can show him that you are interested and see if he is interested too.
  4. Wear soft textures to attract his touch. Studies suggest that people find soft and pleasant textures pleasing and soothing.[5] Try wearing clothing made from microfiber, silk, faux fur, or other soft textures that he'll want to touch. This will make your guy associate these pleasant sensations with being around you.[6]
    • Try wearing red to catch his attention. The color red has been shown to increase feelings of attraction and passion in both men and women. Try wearing a red dress, a red top, or some red lipstick to make him notice you.[7]

Using Your Personality

  1. Emphasize your similarities. Part of the reason why people feel attracted to each other is due to a sense of connection. If you have things in common with him, emphasize those things in your conversations. For example, if you both love a certain type of music or band, talk to him about it. Just make sure that you do not overemphasize or lie about things you have in common. Doing so may cause him to see you as desperate or dishonest.
  2. Demonstrate your independence. Being clingy and dependent on someone else for your happiness are not attractive qualities. Instead, try to show him that you are an independent, strong woman. Showing him that you have a great life and that you don’t need someone else to be happy will intrigue him. Keep your plans with friends and family and turn him down for dates now and then so that he knows that you have your own life.[8]
  3. Be kind and considerate. Being rude to the guy or other people is a quick way to make him lose interest in you. Be polite and kind to the guy you have your eye on and show that you are also kind to others. Demonstrating your kind personality will increase his affection for you.
  4. Show him what makes you special. Letting a guy see what makes you such a catch is another great way to increase his affection for you. It will intrigue him and make him want to get to know you even better. For example, if you are skilled at playing an instrument, look for an opportunity to play in front of him. Or, if you are an excellent baker, whip up some cookies and share some with him.[6]
  5. Be a positive force in his life. Most people can manage to be negative all by themselves, so they're drawn to people who focus on the bright side of things. Instead of focusing on what's wrong with your life or talking about the people who annoy you, try to emphasize what's right. Moreover, be pleasant in all that you say toward him and avoid gossiping. Be a positive person in his presence and aim to be positive in general.[3]
    • This isn't to say that you can never complain around him. Everyone complains. But it can be exhausting to listen to someone gripe constantly. Try to keep a rein on it so that he feels warm and fuzzy about his time with you, not tired and down.

Enticing Him

  1. Maintain a balance. In the beginning of a relationship, it is important to spend lots of time together. During this time, you are just getting to know each other and spending time together should be fun. Don’t fight this urge to spend lots of time with him when you are just starting out, but know when to pull it back. The "scarcity principle" suggests that people are more likely to want and value something that's a bit hard to get.[9] This doesn't mean you have to play mind games with your guy, but make sure that you're not available at the drop of a hat every time he calls. Maintain a good balance between spending time with him and spending time on your own.
    • To get some time away from him, make plans with your friends and family, spend more time alone, or work more to have some time away from him.
    • This strategy may seem odd, but it will be good for both of you. It will give him some time to think about his feelings and it will also give you a chance to think about your feelings. Having some time apart will help the two of you avoid getting bored with each other or taking each other from granted.
  2. Make him feel needed. Doing things to make your guy feel needed may increase his feelings of affection for you. Asking him to help you with something or even just asking for his advice can make him feel needed and important. For example, you might ask him to help you move some furniture in your bedroom or ask him to help you make a decision about your car insurance.[10]
  3. Act casual. Remember: you can't actually make him fall in love with you. He's free to choose what he wants. Beyond that, though, people can't always control who they love. If it's simply not there on his end, resist the temptation to punish him for it. Accept that if the relationship is meant to be, it will happen; if not, then you're meant for something better.
    • Avoid using the "girlfriend" term until he has said it first. If you say it too prematurely, he may run and never look back. Even more importantly, avoid all talk of marriage and babies––that will definitely scare him away.

Tips

  • Let him feel free to be himself around you.
  • Give him space. Let him hang out with his friends, and once in a while say that you can't come. This will make you find out if he really wants you to be around him or not.
  • Be yourself there's no point in trying to be someone you are not just for a guy.
  • If you don't know a few things about him, open a room for getting to know each other. There's no harm in having a good conversation with him.
  • Don't be "easy", say no sometimes and never show him that you are very excited for your date, and make him feel comfortable, and be yourself, it's not worth to change for anyone.
  • If you get to know his friends and you become friends with them, he will feel more comfortable around you.
  • Don't talk about yourself. People tend to do that when they get excited. Give him some room to talk about himself.
  • If he's not interested in you; move on, girl! There are other fishes in the sea destined for you...
  • If you feel the need to flirt, try not to do it too much. For instance, if you flirt-fully tickle him in public, he may think you are weird or get embarrassed to the point where he doesn't want to be near you.
  • Just tell him how you feel about him and hope for the best.
  • If you try to move on and he has feelings for you and you still have feelings for him don't be afraid to tell him how you feel.
  • Don't fall into the over-analysis black hole! Analyzing your feelings for and interactions with him is one thing, but over-doing it can lead you into a black hole of false assumptions, and you don't want to do that.

Warnings

  • Don't flirt with his close friends. This will just end up with fights between mates and none of them will care for you.
  • Don't put him in a compromising position. Men care about how you feel, even if they're not interested in you romantically. Don't force them to answer a question if they look uncomfortable with it.
  • Don't be annoying and obsessive; if he says he wants to be just friends, accept it, but show that you're still interested if he changes his mind.
  • Don't make him feel worthless by ranting on and on about your exes. If you say what you dislike in your exes, he might be put off.
  • Don't be too clingy. If you rely on him for everything, he won't see you as independent, and this is likely to drive him away.

Related Articles

Sources and Citations

  1. ↑ http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/barbara-aleks-hecht/confidence-is-sexy_b_1933183.html
  2. ↑ http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/smile-it-could-make-you-happier/
  3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201402/how-flirt-and-be-attractive
  4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sideways-view/201412/the-secrets-eye-contact-revealed
  5. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/design-and-the-mind/201106/sad-times-call-soft-textures
  6. ↑ 6.0 6.1 http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/a2441/What-Makes-Men-Fall-in-Love/
  7. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201110/how-get-man-or-woman-attracted-color
  8. ↑ http://www.cosmopolitan.co.uk/love-sex/sex/tips/g558/12-steps-make-him-love-you/?slide=7
  9. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-attraction-doctor/201204/does-playing-hard-get-make-you-fall-in-love
  10. ↑ http://www.relationshipmatters.com/a-few-good-ways-to-please-your-man/
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