Stop Staring at a Girl's Boobs
A lot of people can’t keep their eyes front and center when talking to women. It can be disrespectful, especially if the girl notices the staring, so it's a good idea to lift your gaze to meet the girl's eyes. It's okay if this is a problem for you -- after all, you're only human -- but if you want the girl to respect you and to not feel objectified, then you have to make an effort to change your tune.
Steps
Looking Elsewhere
- Make eye contact. If you're talking to the girl, then you should stay focused on her face. If just looking into her eyes isn't enough for you, start to really study them. Note the color of her eyes, whether or not they are speckled, how they are shaped, what kind of eye makeup, if any, she is wearing, how long her lashes are, etc. Only do this if you don't think it's creeping her out, and if you're engaged in conversation.
- Even if you're focusing on her eyes, you should break eye contact from time to time so the girl doesn't feel creeped out or like you're paying too much attention to her face.
- Pay attention to the rest of her face. Pretend you have to give her description to a sketch artist and fixate on her facial features. Note the color of her eyebrows, the shape of her nose, the width of her cheekbones, whether or not she has freckles or moles, etc. If you’re an artist, try to memorize her face well enough to be able to sketch it later. Again, try not to stare. Keep your eye gaze natural and let it flit around the scenery around you two as well.
- This is best achieved by looking at her whole face at once and mentally noting her various features, not by eyeballing every area of her face individually. Be especially careful not to stare at her lips, as this can also be taken the wrong way.
- Stare off to the side like you’re lost in thought. If you don’t know her that well or feel like you’ve been staring too long, alternate between looking at her face and looking off to the side like you’re thinking or remembering something. (Looking up and to one side is especially effective, as it keeps your eyes from straying downwards.) Though this may feel weird to you at first, it’s very common for people to get lost in thought like this when they speak.
- Find another place to rest your eyes. So making eye contact is great, but you can't do it 24/7 without freaking the girl out, so decide on a place where you will rest your eyes from time to time. It can be the clock above the girl's head, it can be your watch or the books you're holding, or it can be the door to the left of you. Whenever your eyes need to take a break, return them to that same location so they don't end up wandering over to an inappropriate area. One of the reasons that you may be looking at the girl's chest is because you feel the need to break eye contact and naturally rest your eyes on an appealing place.
- Sure, the girl may think it's a little strange that you're looking at the clock every minute, but that's better than staring at her chest, isn't it?
Trying Other Tactics
- Get lost in conversation. Talk to her about anything -- movies, school, events, or whatever interests you enough to distract you from her breasts. Practice the art of good conversation and attentive listening. If you're having a great conversation, then soon enough, you won't be thinking about her boobs. Think of ways to make her laugh, impress her, or to make her feel special, and soon enough, you'll be focusing on the right things.
- Think of the consequences. If you do end up staring at the girl's boobs, she will definitely notice. She may call you out on it and embarrass you, or she may just feel bad and like you think of her as a sex object. Either way, looking at the girl's boobs won't make your relationship any better and can only lead to bad things. Here are some other consequences that may happen as a result of you staring at the girl's breasts:
- You may get an embarrassing erection from looking at her breasts for too long.
- You will likely lose any chance of asking her out or seducing her.
- She may tell other girls what happened and they won't want to hang out with you because they will think you're a pervert.
- If all else fails, pretend she’s your mother. If nothing else is working for you, picture your mom’s face in place of hers. That should keep your eyeballs squared firmly above her shoulders. Though this may sounds a little bit gross, that's exactly the point -- do whatever you can to keep your eyes at eye level. Nobody said it was going to be fun. And hey, why not, you can also pretend she's your sister. Either way will keep you nice and respectful.
- Apologize if you're caught. If the girl catches you staring at her chest and calls you out on it, then don't deny it, turn bright red, and call her a liar. Just fess up. Say, "I'm so sorry, I know that was disrespectful." Sure, that won't be pleasant for you, but it's better than looking like a wimp. Remember that seeing you looking at her chest probably wasn't all that pleasant for the girl, either.
Tips
- If you find it hard to look at her eyes, stare at the space between them or just above them.
- Try to be animate. Leaning to the side, sitting down, stretching, and brushing your hair, among many other things, allow you to logically look away from her point of view.
- They say looking at a person's face in a triangular motion, that is, looking into each of her eyes and her mouth and going back and forth helps in looking like you're engaged in the conversation.
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