Talk to Your Crush Even Though You Are Shy

Talking to your crush can be intimidating for anyone, but this is especially true if you're shy. Simple conversation starters like compliments and pop culture can be great ways to begin talking to your crush when you're shy, and if you talk to each other a lot, you may eventually feel comfortable enough to even reveal your feelings. Confidence is key at any level so take a deep breath, be yourself, and go for it!

Steps

  1. Have confidence, even if you are shy. Or, fake it till you make it––just thinking about being more confident can help even if you don't actually feel this way. Think of who you are, and if your crush likes you the way you are, they will accept you. Having confidence is one of the key ways to get your crush's attention. Not having enough confidence will show through your words and actions. Be proud of who you are!
    • Stand up straight. Good posture will trick your brain into thinking you're confident.
  2. Be yourself when you speak with your crush. Your crush may not like you if you pretend to be someone you're not. Plus, it gets tiring to have to put on an act every day. Your personality should shine through your words. Never be ashamed of who you are - don't try to hide yourself!
  3. Start simply. Conversations can be easily started with just a simple sentence. All it takes is bravery and confidence in yourself. If you are passing in the hallways, just try to get the courage to greet them and softly smile. There is nothing more powerful than a genuine, acknowledging smile. Eye contact is also very important in this step.
    • If you have a crush on a girl, compliment her on things she does in class as well, or something you know she did like an event or win an award. It will mean a lot more to her if you complement her actions rather than her outfit or hair. You should show an interest in their personality, not just their looks.
    • If you have a crush on a guy, you might want to compliment their looks and outfits (if you really like an item of clothing they wear well, like a hat, compliment it), or focus on something they did. For example, you could say, "Hey, that presentation you did in class was great" or "You did great at yesterday's soccer game!". Things like this will boost their ego and make them feel great about themselves.
  4. Have an interesting topic to talk about. Read some blogs or check the news. Read magazines, books, watch TV, have adventures, listen to different music, and watch different movies. If you expand your knowledge to a variety of topics, you'll have lots to talk about with your crush!
  5. Don't lie or embellish when you talk to your crush. If they enjoy a hobby that you don't, refrain from lying and telling them you like it also. Your crush will eventually discover the truth and their opinion of you will diminish.
  6. Be nice. Never give your crush mean looks or anything to draw attention unless they know you're joking with them. When you do tease or joke with them, make sure it's obvious and that you don't really mean it. However, too much teasing may lead to hurt feelings and a sour relationship! Keep your teasing to a minimum and light-hearted; tease them only about things you know that they won't mind. Keep away from touchy topics.
  7. Break bad habits. If you have any bad habits while talking to your crush, you'll be at a downside. Try to be yourself, but refrain from cursing excessively, calling everything retarded, etc. Keep your conversations innocent, clean, but entertaining in a positive way.
  8. Make things clear. After talking to crush a lot, finally come out with saying you like them, but don't say the exact line! Your line should be something like a hint, but big and clear enough that your crush will get the point and understand. Come up with something original:
    • "Hey uh...I've been talking a lot with you because I like you"
    • "Hi, nice to see you again, um, look, I like you"
    • "Hey. I gotta tell you something. I maybe um, sorta kinda like you a little bit"
    • "Uh hi.. um okay I know I'm shy and all, but I have feelings for you.." something like that might work.
    • "Hey um, look, I have to tell you something, and you might like it, or might not. -sigh- I like you."
    • "Hi, um, look, I think you're a cool person. I'm sure there's someone that likes you out there." will be good enough (see tips for more suggestions).
      • Refrain from sounding like you have practiced the line. One to three "um" or "ah" will make it sound more natural - stick them in appropriate places!
      • Try not to use "um" and "ah" too much. It will make your crush think that you're far too shy! When confessing your crush on them, let them know about it with confidence. Everyone likes someone with confidence - the more confidence, the better. However, be careful about having too much confidence!
      • Have eye contact when you're telling your crush you like him/her. It will make you appear more confident and it makes you look bold!
  9. Ask him/her out if your crush likes you back. However, if your crush doesn't feel the same about you, it's fine. There are plenty of other fish in the sea. The right person is out there, waiting for you to come around the corner. If you never get past this event, you will never find your true love! Move on!

Tips

  • Be truthful. Do not lie. If you lie to the person you like, they will find out eventually and may never respect you for it.
  • Do not leave it too long! If you do, someone else might get your crush before you do, that is an awful feeling.
  • Do not be rude if your crush doesn't like you back. It isn't fair to them that you are giving them mean looks and are rude to them just because they are not interested in you.
  • If you want to tell your crush that you like them, but you are too shy, don't get one of your friends to tell them. This will make it seem like you don't care enough to take the risk.
  • Don't boast! That may make them feel bad.
  • Don't let them think that you are obsessed with them.
  • Always remember that you can't grow as a person without going outside your comfort zone. In other words, take a step out and take a chance for a minute and watch the impossible happen! It may be uncomfortable, but it can't hurt you. And you will never know unless you try.
  • Don't stare at your crush awkwardly, just look at them every so often and if they look back at you, then just smile. If they smile back, that means they probably like you.
  • If your crush seems to talk to you in a light baby voice or says please a lot and touches you, they probably like you.
  • Talk about what you both like, make yourself interesting. They will want to spend more time with you and, eventually, they might like you too.
  • If you are shy, ask a friend to be with you, you know to help things get going if you're too shy. Soon, you may be able to do things on your own!
  • Don't get upset if they don't like you back. Just tell yourself that you tried and that they just aren't the one.
  • Don't fight with the person you like; it will give them the idea you don't like them at all.
  • If the person you are trying to talk to sounds annoyed when you talk to then a lot, they might not like you.
  • You can win a person's heart by being funny. Try to find some jokes that everyone would like (read: no discriminating, disgusting or otherwise potentially offensive jokes) and which are short and easy to memorize. Test them on a friend or a family member. Practice telling it in a fluent but not too fast way, so you won't stumble over your own words. And in case this happens anyway: Laugh about yourself - if your crush is a kind person, they'll see that you are an easy-going human being that could be fun to hang out with.
  • Talk about things you have in common. Try to talk about things you both find interesting, not boring.
  • Smile and be happy around them, hint to them that you like them
  • Try and casually be around your crush but not excessively, and make sure that if you're being around your crush, your crush likes it. If your crush asks to sit by you at lunch or be your partner for a class project, that's a good sign.
  • Remember, body language counts, too! Maintain eye contact with them when you are talking. This will get the message across that you enjoy their company. And always smile!
  • Don't worry about it if they don't like you,even though it's hard, just move on.
  • Get to know their friends a little bit more if you haven't already. Don't get too close to them though because if your crush does like you they might think that your not interested anymore.
  • Give her some space. If you talk to her every time you see her, she will become annoyed.
  • Try and refrain from telling a lot of people you like your crush, because it could make it's way back to them, and they might feel embarrassed.

Warnings

  • Don't tell your friends you like your crush unless you can honestly trust them. They might tell everyone, making the situation between you and your crush awkward! And even if they don't tell, you still might feel awkward interacting with your crush when they're watching you.
  • Having your friends talk to your crush for you can be awkward for both your friends and your crush; it is best to just talk with him yourself.
  • Try not to play with your fingers or any jewelry you have on. They might be able to tell you're nervous.

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